Rambling beauty

the darkblue night sky blankets me in the warmth of the heavens,
a god, a god i say to the person next to me but this though cannot be emapthized i suppose.
the stars shine,
and love shines,
and i shine,
but the thought is still stagnated to my mind
a lonliness,
a veratile feeling of exemptness from normal ebb and flow of thought.
i wish myself to become one with it,
i wish to become nature,
to have what makes me,
make others,
if i should become grass,
then let the deer eat of that grass and i shall be a part of the deer,
if the deer's life should be taken may i become part of the cunning predator.
make myself a son a daughter and father a mother and sister a brother,
and in this i am god and my life only the greatest gift to be given to me to interpret the things i intake,
i wish for a stability so that i may love deeply a woman of great beauty in body and spirit,
the love made would bring me close to that which i call god.
i dont want to be a tool, i dont want to be a tool,
i wish only to be, to love and live and write and play and sing.
may i find a love to melt into and let my heart calm.
may i find you love, where you may be.
the plan of all that exists, do not let my stay without a love,