Chapter 1

Tears filled her dull blue eyes as images flashed before her, his harsh words filling her ears.  She crumpled, broken, to her bedroom floor, her dark hair swirling around her face.  Pain ripped and gnawed at her chest as she curled into herself.
~ *~
Laughter filled the room and she was surrounded by smiling faces.  She carefully scanned the faces, searching, but his wasn’t anywhere in sight.  Panic began to seize her mind, her legs began to tremble.  When the room began to spin, she carefully moved to an empty couch.  Once seated, she placed her head against the back of the couch and closed her eyes.  He’ll be here she thought, trying to calm herself.
“Katrina, are you okay?” his voice asked.  Opening her eyes, she saw his face clearly and she stared into his brown eyes.  A small smile appeared on his face and her heart fluttered.  Slowly, he ran his hand through his black hair.  Coming to the party suddenly seemed like a good idea.
         “I am now, you’re here.” She responded.  Jason and Rina had been dating for three months-today was their three month anniversary; she was head over heels in love with him and she even over looked the fact that he always called her ‘Katrina’.
         “Why are you so dressed up?” he asked.  “A dress is not normal for you.”
         “Hmm, I wonder.” She teased.
         “Jason!” a female voice rang above the laughter.  Rina looked towards the source of the call and her heart stopped.  Slithering their way was one of the most beautiful girls she’s ever seen; her almond shaped sapphire blue eyes were enhanced by the way her wavy blond hair fell around her heart shaped face.  She wove gracefully through the crowd even though she wore four inch stiletto heels.  The rose colored halter dress she wore clung to her every curve and it seemed to perfectly frame her breast; the stranger looked like she belonged on the run way, rather than a high school party.  This girls’ sheer beauty suddenly made Rina feel sub-standard.
         “Malorie,” Jason called back, unnecessarily gesturing for her to join them.  When Malorie reached Jason, they hugged tightly and, as they turned back to face Rina, Jason left his arm around her waist.  Immediately, the atmosphere in the room changed; Rina struggled to breathe as her world seemed to crash down on her.  She couldn’t seem to think clearly as she gawked at the two people standing in front of her.
         “Who’s this, darling?” Malorie purred.
         “Just a girl I know from school; I help her with physics.” he replied.  Rina felt her stomach flip over and over again.  She knew what must be happening but she didn’t want to believe it; pain tore at her chest and her throat as she fought back the tears.  “Why don’t you try to find Mike and Ash?” he suggested to the beauty beside him.  She leaned towards him and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before she ambled away.
         “No.” Rina uttered in disbelief.  How could this happen? They were in love, weren’t they?  This didn’t happen to people who were in love.  Rina stared at the boy she loved but she felt nothing in his returning gaze: she felt empty.
         “Yes.  Katrina, it’s over.” He hesitated “It has been for a while; I met Malorie in May and she made me realize what I was missing out on.”  His words hit her hard, like a steel bar slamming into her chest.  Why would he do this to her? How could he do this to her?          “I thought you loved me.” she whispered so her voice wouldn’t crack.  As she spoke, memories flooded into her mind so fast it made her dizzy.  As she remembered with a new perspective, she realized her words were false.  Jason seemed to see the realization on Rina’s face for he swooped down and kissed her on the check.
         “Good-bye.” he whispered into her ear.  Jason straightened, turned, and walked in the general direction in which Malorie had sauntered off a few moments earlier.  Dread quickly filled Rina, like poison in her bloodstream.  Her mind was numb as she stood up and stumbled towards the door, bumping into strangers as she went.  When she reached the door, she turned and her eyes swept the room; in a corner, Malorie was sitting on Jason’s lap while his arms snaked around her.  Rina turned back towards the door and walked out into the night.  A cold, bitter wind whipped around her, biting at every inch of her exposed skin.  She didn’t care, nothing mattered anymore.  She walked home, numb, as honking cars flew down the street.  When she finally opened the door to her house, the tears she’d been holding back violently burst from her.
~*~
         As she curled into herself, her cell phone vibrated in her purse somewhere; she didn’t move to answer it- it wouldn’t be the person she wanted to talk to.  Rina wanted to fall asleep so she wouldn’t have to think anymore; she didn’t even bother to get into her bed or remove her lavender dress.  The heel of one of her black shoes dug into the opposite ankle as she curled up tighter.  She knew she wouldn’t be able to fall asleep, yet she just laid there, tears streaming down her face, pain burning her insides.
         Her phone vibrated again, but she didn’t move.  Rina heard the front door open and close-her mother was home from her date.  Her mother tread quietly up the stairs so she wouldn’t wake up Zach, Rina’s little brother; Rina thought for a fleeting second where the babysitter was.  There was a knock on the door and Rina moaned: she didn’t want to talk to anyone about anything.  The door swung open and her mother glided towards the bed.  “Rina?” her mother quietly called.  Rina moaned and her mother looked around the corner of the bed to find her distraught daughter.  “Baby, are you okay?” she asked frantically.
         At these words, Rina burst into renewed tears, her whole body aching from the heaving.  “H-he b-broke up-p wi-ith m-e!” she sobbed.  Rina tried to blink the tears away so she could see her mothers’ face- some comfort must lay there.  Rina’s mother was a slender woman, whose round face was out-lined by her light brown hair; Rina stared up into her mothers’ anxious bright blue eyes and she began to cry again.  She cursed the blond bitch to hell for making it difficult to look at her mother.
         Rina’s mother kneeled next to her and pulled her upright so that she could hold her sobbing daughter.  Rina allowed herself to be held and she placed her head against her mothers’ bare shoulder.  As she drifted towards unconsciousness, she felt her mother lift her from the floor to her bed with difficulty.
         Her sleep wasn’t easy: her mind kept replaying the horrible night.  She saw Jason’s face, his eyes, and how they held no love for her as he’d said his good-byes; she saw the beautiful blond and how she’d perched on his lap in the corner of the party, a spot that wasn’t supposed to be for her.  How could he do that? when she shuddered, screaming awake.  As she lay in her bed, new tears making their way down her cheeks and she curled into a ball on top of her blankets.