For the Best

PROLOGUE:

“I guess to look back now would make it all appear insignificant.  I have to look to the future and I just can’t see you in it with me.”

Tears slid quickly down her smooth face, landing at the bottom of the note. Her hand continued to write on.

“I hope you understand what I’m trying to say and realize that it’s the truth. I’m so sorry for hurting you like this, if I wouldn’t have been so selfish, I could have saved us both. I’m so sorry.”

A tear slid downward, smearing the last word. Her reddened wet eyes looked towards the bed where his silhouette slept soundly in tussled sheets. She dwelled on the idea of him trying to find her. God, she hoped he wouldn’t be such a fool. Her eyes trailed the skin that was left bare and uncovered; she could remember the feel of it, his smell. She wondered how long it would take before the aching would stop. The idea of longing made several more tears flow down her face, each quicker than the last. But she had to do this; she wouldn’t let him die like the others. He meant too much.

So stupid of her to get him involved. What was she thinking? That everything would dissolve itself, had she really been that naïve?

The thought of signing the letter with an ‘I love you’ came so naturally that she hadn’t thought about it until it had already been done. She erased it quickly, ripping a small hole in the paper.  She couldn’t leave him with any ounce of hope. That would be reason enough to track her down. She refused to let him know how far down the rabbit hole could go. Questioning would be impossible to avoid, he would search and want to know. Her only wish was that it would all end clean.



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Summer was at its peak and Lea had the sweat to prove it. A hand moved to wipe some aside as her eyes watched sternly forward. There hadn’t been movement for over an hour now. “What could be taking them so fucking long?” she whispered to herself from inside the car. She looked back at the dashboard where 1 o’clock am flashed neon red. Lea released a deep sigh of exhaustion before turning her attention back to the house. The lights that had shown from windows were now gone, night enveloped the house. The front door had just begun to open as Lea slouched hastily into the driver’s side seat afraid of being seen.

The laughter of two was heard as the front door slammed shut. The female’s voice she knew all too well, the male was unknown.  The start of an engine told her that the freedom to peak was close at hand, and as soon as the sound of the engine had disappeared, Lea poked her head just above the window.  With the car surely gone, she sat up fully and started to assemble herself. A dark duffle bag was pulled from beneath the passenger seat and placed on top of the seat.  She opened it quickly, and sent both hands to work placing specific items on her own lap.  Her hands quickly went to a rosary the hung from the car’s rear view mirror, moving it to her own neck.

Lea breathed in deeply while the cross was held within her hand, her eyes closed in a small prayer. The order in which things were prepared had become a tradition and had been easily placed on her body.  First a rather large cross ring that took two finger holes was placed on her left hand, the cross it’s self about an inch and a half long. Second a wrist sheath that held a nice four inch steal blade was put into place. Finally a wooden stake was slid into the back of her pants and hidden beneath her shirt. With everything in its place, Lea closed the bag up and dumped it onto the floor so that it could be hidden by the dark.