Sorrow Soaked Memories

The sun unveiled her emotions as it rose to kiss the sky good morning. Trapped in her own thoughts of a love that was as gentle as the tears that now streamed down her rosy cheeks. How could it be that she could weep this much of something she lost so very long ago? She wondered if she were to be forever plagued with this never ending sadness of a great love perished. Was this her love story? This has to be a tragic mystery and the end seems far from over. Perhaps she is waiting on an ironic twist.. great stories often had those, right? The window feels so cold against her forehead as she catches a glimpse of herself in the sideview mirror. Empty. Her face looked as if someone replaced her reflection with a mere sketch of herself. No details.. no expressions.. just outlines. What a scary image. Frightening to see the girl who holds all these emotions somewhere so deep inside..pushed down and away. It is her from ages ago frozen in time.. that face she often saw when the wounds were fresh and the feel of familiar wet salt was the only thing that comforted her. She closes her eyes and floats along the melody of the music that shared her feeling of sorrow. It guided her to painful questions that she often pondered in this state of mind. What is the point of this life if her one true love's eyes never gazed longingly into hers? If she never again breathed in the scent of her skin before falling asleep.. if.. she never touched her intimately ever again? Some of these questions appeared visually which only made her sob more deeply. How many times did she have to tell herself it was gone before she could move on? How many tears had to be shed before they carried her to a place of acceptance? Always asked.. and always unanswered. Time heals all wounds but what if shes just... broken? What heals her then? "Crazy glue" seems to be the only response that ironically made sense. Silly. She then turns to thoughts that were not any nicer than the lasts... She could not decipher which was worse.. that she always deals with such a pain alone.. or that she frankly feels like there is just no one to help her through such a chaotic mess. She longed to be held at that precise moment. No one had to understand or feel her pain; she just wants to let go while safe inside the protection of someone's .. anyone's arms. Let the tears dramatically fall on someone else's shoulders. Some shoulders have undoubtedly grown cold of this age-old subject and maybe thats why she shys away from even begining to ask. Instead she sat and mimmicked the undisturbed morning air and let the feelings take over her. She learned over the years that It was easier to let these occasions run its course through her veins than to try and pretend like she did not care. She cared. And these tears and these sorrow soaked memories were all she had left of the lovely dreams that were once her real life.. and these, she knew, were greater than nothing at all...