♥ Memories of [[Me && You]]

♥ Memories of [[You && Me]] ♥


Once upon a time . . .
♥ x ♥

If only this was a fairy tale, she thought.

“Whathappened?” The words were rushed and sounded like one word. She took a deep breath, pushing a piece of her brown hair out of her gray, broken, pained eyes. Her heart was beating fast. Too fast. She felt like she was going to be sick.

His mother, the mother of the boy she'd fallen in love with so long ago, stood up. Taylor Cohen felt herself about to crack. She needed to know what happened. Andrew Bay's mother said, her words soft and painful, “He's in a coma.”

Taylor didn't know what to do. Somehow, just like in the really sad movies, time froze still. Taylor couldn't see Drew's mother, she couldn't see the doctors and the nurses. All she seemed to be able to see was the door. Running towards it, she felt her world slipping fast. Part of her wanted to let go, but the other part of her was telling her to hang on.

She pushed the door opened, not surprised by the big 'bang' noise it made. She'd barely heard it. Time was still, and she scrambled over to the bed.

There was her Drew. His eyes were closed, his skin was deathly white, and cuts and scraps covered his face. She grabbed his hand, immediately feeling the shock that had always happened when they touched, but she didn't even glance when his heart monitor picked up speed. He knew she was here.

She didn't, or rather, couldn't see the man he'd become with all the cuts and bruises. She couldn't see the bandage that covered part of his forehead. All she saw was the boy she loved, sleeping peacefully. It was easier that way.

She slipped into the past as she felt the hot, stinging tears chase each other down her cheeks.

♥ x ♥

“Drew! Stop it, would ya?” she said, bursting into giggles. She was her teenage self, shorter, skinner, little black glasses, an outfit that her father would kill her if he'd seen her, and freckles all over her cheeks. Her long, wavy brown hair was untouched by dye, and the blonde and red were dancing under the sun's rays. Her eyes were bright with happiness. She was innocent.

“Aw, come on. You have to get in the water! It's great!” Drew called up to her as he splashed around. His hair was wet, but if anything, it made him look hotter. His green eyes were still intense, and they were on her. Not anyone else. His face wasn't so hard or worn, it was easy and gentle.

She glanced down at what she was wearing. Definitely not a bathing suit. She was wearing her short, favourite mini-skirt that was a pink and brown plaid. Underneath it, she wore her little black panties. Her top was a simple white blouse, with a black tank top under it. She also wore her black bra too. She looked at Drew and decided she wanted to play a little bit naughty today.

“Alright, but remember you asked for it.” As she said the words, she slowly unbuttoned her blouse. Drew had only ever seen her in her little blue and purple bathing suit. And that was a one piece. Her father wouldn't have let her get a bikini to save her life.

She kicked her brown flip-flops off and tugged her blouse off. Tossing it on top of her flip-flops, she slowly pulled down her mini-skirt.

“What are you doing?” Drew asked, when he realized what she was about to do. She wanted to laugh, she loved the look of desire he had on.

“I'm going swimming with my best friend,” she told him, and then added the mini-skirt to the pile.

“No, you're not. You're stripping,” he said, his eyes wide. She smiled, almost like she liked the feeling of danger, and then she tugged her tank top off.

With that done, she squealed, “Cannonball!” just as she jumped into the lake.

When she came up, her brown hair was wet and she was pushing a piece of seaweed off her face. She looked up at Drew, almost like a challenge. She swam towards him, and then said, “So, you were right.”

“About?” he asked, and she heard his breath catch. Finally he saw her as a woman and not some stinking best friend or worse, little sister. She grinned.

“About the water being great,” she told him, swimming in a little circle around him. “You usually are right, that's why I came in.”

“After you stripped first,” he told her, nodding.

“Aw, come on. Hasn't it been your fantasy that a fifteen year old girl strips in front of you? Or are you disappointed it was me who made it come alive?” her voice was soft, and teasing. Her threat was real though. If he told her he was disappointed, she would drown him. Not literally, because she was her best friend and she loved him more than life itself, but she would be going home wet and with a broken heart. She waited for his answer.

“Not disappointed,” he told her, his green eyes locked on her gray ones, “Very, very, very happy.”

She wasn't sure who leaned in first, but suddenly they were kissing. Sizzles and snaps were happening. It'd always been sizzles, snaps and shocks when they touched each other. Usually they avoided touching, and maybe because they knew it would be like this. Electrifying, Earth-shattering. Her hands slipped up his sides, and his found her waist.

She couldn't breathe, and she liked the feeling. When they finally broke apart for air, she looked at him. She could feel the heat between them -- hell, she was sure people on the other side of the lake could feel the heat between them -- and bit down on her bottom lip.

“Holy,” he said, his eyes meeting hers. A smile played at his lips.

“Yeah,” she'd said, just as breathless. Not surprised, but breathless.

That had been their first kiss. They'd been the hottest high school sweethearts through high school since that kiss.

♥ x ♥

“Wake up, Drew. Drew, you have to wake up. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I shouldn't have left, but the pain was unbearable. You have to understand, if I could I would go back and do it all over again. Drew, Drew, wake up.”

The words came out slurred, because she was trying not to break down sobbing. She hiccupped and swallowed. Trying to breathe, she squeezed Drew's hand. She saw him, the man he became and she liked him. He was handsome, strong and tough. A hard worker, and part of him seemed sad. She started to shake, but held the tears back. She wouldn't break down, not when Drew needed her the most.

“He won't wake up,” a small, tiny, deep voice came from behind her. She sucked in air, and turned around to see Drew's older brother, Mac. Her lips parted, just slightly, and then she pressed them together.

A single tear slid down her cheek. She looked back at Drew. “No,” she murmured, “he will wake up. He has to.”

“Not everyone gets a second chance, Taylor,” Mac said, as he walked to the opposite side of his younger brother by a year's bed. “The doctors want people to give their peace. Then we're supposed to pull the plug.”

“No,” Taylor said, shaking her head fiercely, “he will live, Mac. Please, you have to believe that the doctors got this one wrong. They got this one wrong! Drew will be okay. Oh, God, Mac, Drew has to be okay.”

With that, she collapsed into her own gut-wrenching sobs.

She could still remember the smile on his face, the taste of his lips, the touch of his skin.

♥ x ♥

“Drew! Drew!” the younger version of Taylor called out. She giggled and raced down the hall. Drew turned around and saw her. Immediately his face lit up and he opened his arms. She ran into them, finding them like a safe haven from the rest of the world. She giggled and sighed peacefully.

He slipped his arms around her waist, and then she looked up at him. His lips barely brushed hers, but the light kiss made her jump, like always. It wasn't a feeling she would get used to. To feeling this excitement, this love, this desire.

“What's going on, girlfriend?” he said, with a tease in his voice. His green eyes bore into her, like they were seeing right down to her soul.

“I aced my exam!” she squealed and then pulled him closer to her. The electricity that flowed through them would always amaze her. She could feel the warmth rushing through her. Her safe haven. Invincible. She'd always felt like nothing could tear them down, tear them apart. How wrong she'd been.

“Tay-Tay, that's awesome!” he said, holding her close. He leaned down, his lips brushing her ear, his voice low, deep and honest, “I love you, Taylor Cohen.”

She froze and looked up at him with wide eyes. It'd been the first time he'd said it to her, and she felt tears in her eyes. She was so happy, life was good. She grinned at him and leaned up on her tippy toes. Her voice was low and arousing, “I love you too, Andrew.”

He grinned at her, and said, “Then let's go and take on the world.”

She giggled.

♥ x ♥

She remembered being so happy with him. So in love. Not so stupid. Taylor looked at him, squeezing his hand, she wondered how she could've let him go. Her eyes tore apart from him for a second, as she looked at Mac and asked softly, “Do you think he'd want me here? After I...after what happened?”

“I think he would,” Mac replied, “and I think he'd want you to know it's okay to let go. Come on, Taylor, you know Mom wouldn't have called you unless we knew he'd want you here. Drew was miserable after you left, he worked himself way too hard.” Sounded just like her, she realized with a startle. “He loved you. He would've forgiven you and let you get your peace. He wouldn't want you to hang on to him.”

Taylor looked at her Drew. That was the funny thing about Drew, she'd always thought of him as hers. Even before the warm summer day when they'd shared their first kiss, he'd always been hers. Sighing heavily, and not too peacefully, she murmured, “I'm not letting go of him. Not this time. Thank your mother for calling me, but I'm not giving up on him. He will live. He will open his damn beautiful eyes and he will be okay. He will not die. If you're going to bring doubts and negativity in here, you have to leave. He needs us. He needs me.”

Mac glanced at her, parted his lips to tell her what he thought of her and her damn hope, then closed them. He didn't really want to watch his brother die, no matter how hard it'd been between them. So, with that, he got up and murmured, “Maybe your love alone will bring him back,” and then quietly left the room.

Taylor found herself pushing her top up. Her little scar was still there, and she put her hand on it. An emergency C-section that hadn't come quickly enough. She pressed her forehead against his hand and whispered, “Our little Annabelle, she was beautiful, wasn't she? Oh, baby, Drew...I'm so sorry.”

♥ x ♥

“Drew! I can't believe we just got married!” Taylor squealed, as she lifted herself up to look out the sun roof. Drew followed her and Taylor giggled. They waved bye to their friends and family. It was time for them to go on their honeymoon. Taylor wrapped her arms around Drew's chest, and drew him close to her. She had tears in her eyes, but what other twenty year old woman who just got married do? She hugged him and he kissed her forehead.

“We're forever baby,” he said, with a chuckle. “Now, dry your eyes. We've got some lovin' to do.”

She laughed, freely and openly. She'd given Drew everything she'd had, and would've given him more if she could. As they slipped down into the back of the limo, she asked in a small voice, “Think my dad will come around?”

“I think he already has,” Drew told her, grinning. “I over heard him and my mom discussing the, ahem, house they bought. For us.”

“They bought us a house?” Taylor screamed. Drew laughed and pulled her into his lap.

She kissed him and laughed again. “Second best day of my life.”

“Second? What was your first?” Drew asked, his eyes shinning curiously into hers. She grinned.

“The day I stripped in front of you and you kissed me,” she told him and then kissed his lips again. Sparks were flying everywhere, and she thought that was okay.

“Ah, so in celebration of you becoming my very own wife, would you like to repeat that scene?” His voice went low, and she liked it, “With less clothes on, say?”

“Oh, Taylor like, Taylor like a lot,” she said, going into a giggling fit as he tickled her. “I love you Drew.”

“I love you more, Taylor.”

And that night, he showed her just how much.

♥ x ♥

Taylor looked at Drew. His heart monitor told her that he was still alive, still breathing, but was that him or was that the machine? She squeezed his hand and found herself praying to God -- something her family had never believed in.

“Just make him okay. I'm sorry,” she prayed, out loud, “I'm sorry I messed up. I left him when we needed each other the most. I just need a second chance. I love him with everything I have. Everything. Take me instead. Please, please, God, let Andrew live. Just let him live. I need him like I need air, and it took me two years to figure that out. Maybe I already knew, but if something happens to him, if he dies, well, we're a packaged deal. You take him, you get me.”

“Doctors are wrong all the time,” a voice came, soft, timid and low. Taylor raised her head and looked up to find Drew's father walking in. She nodded and then kept her eyes on Drew. “They're only human too. You made a mistake, and you're paying for it. But maybe the doctors made a mistake too. That's what Mac says you're saying.”

“Mac's an idiot. He tried to tell me to just let go. How do I let go of my life?” her voice was soft, scared and she knew she looked like a wreck. But her looks hardly mattered to her. When Drew was around, they'd hardly mattered then either.

“You don't,” Drew's father said carefully. Taylor looked up and met his eyes. Just like Drew's eyes, except she couldn't see Drew's eyes because they were still hidden beneath his eye lids. “Come on, Taylor, don't you remember what Drew used to tell you?”

Taylor nodded. “He used to say, 'Everything has a reason, Tay-Tay. But that doesn't mean you give up and don't fight for what you love. Miracles happen in strange ways, I mean, look at you. You're my miracle.' And I used to think he was cute. He was -- is -- my everything.”

“Isn't that why you never got a divorce?”

The question hung in the air, even after he left her alone. Taylor knew Drew had been in a coma for five days, and they'd all made their peace with it. She hadn't. That's why they called her. She hadn't been able to make peace with anything.

♥ x ♥

“Don't push, don't push,” someone kept saying. She could barely hear them over the pain and over the screams. Who was screaming? she wondered. Realizing it was her, she groaned. “Don't push, honey. Everything's going to be okay.”

Someone was squeezing her hand. She supposed it was supposed to be comforting, but the way they were squeezing, it only brought on more pain.

“Don't push, Miss. Bay. Don't push. You're going to be going in for a C-section, alright? This baby needs to come out now.” A strong voice. Feminine. Obviously a doctor who knew her stuff.

Taylor nodded, taking in gulps of air.

Forty-five minutes later, Taylor felt like she was going to pass out. The doctor, Dr. Vandertramp, had given her a needle that froze from her waist down. For the pain, Dr. Vandertramp had told her. It wouldn't harm the baby.

Taylor waited for what felt like eternity and then finally, she was allowed to see her baby girl. Annabelle Bay, is what her and Drew and decided to call her. She was all rosy pink, and she wasn't crying.

“Why isn't she crying?” Taylor asked, knowing immediately something was wrong.

Then they took her away from them and wheeled Taylor into a private room. None of the doctors would tell her what happened. Drew sat beside her, telling her everything would be okay, and holding her hand. He kissed it enough to let her know that she should be worried. She was worried.

Then a nurse came in and sat down beside her. The nurse looked oddly familiar, and Taylor realized it wasn't a nurse at all. It was Dr. Miller. Taylor's eyes filled with tears. Dr. Miller said, softly, “There's been some complications.”

“Do I get to see her?” Taylor asked, tears over-flowing from her eyes. “Or is Annabelle...already gone?”

“You can hold her, but she only has less than an hour left. I'm so, so, so sorry, Taylor. Drew.”

With that, Taylor and Drew took turns holding their little daughter. Taylor's arms shook, but she talked to her baby daugther and told her how much she regretted that Annabelle wouldn't be able to grown up.

That was the day her entire world fell apart. Annabelle Tay Bay died in her arms.

♥ x ♥

“I didn't mean to lose it,” Taylor found herself whispering, “but when you wanted to try again, only a year after Annabelle...well, Drew, I couldn't take it. I'm sorry I was weak after she died. I know I ruined everything. Oh, God, Drew, she was barely even two hours old, and the life was sucked out of her. Annabelle...Annabelle was my baby girl.”

She started to sob, and she needed someone to comfort her. She needed to feel safe. Drew had always been her safe haven. She crawled up in the bed, laying partly on him. She shivered as she felt how stiff he was. She looked up at him, caressing his cheek. She whispered, “I love you, Andrew Bay. You're mine. Forever. Don't forget it, okay?”

She laid her head on his shoulder and with hot tears still damp on her cheeks, she drifted off to sleep. She had found her safe haven again.

♥ x ♥

“Drew, I'm sorry,” a broken hearted, depressed Taylor pushed him off. She shook her head, tears falling freely but painfully, “I love you. I always will, but I can't do this anymore. I have to go. I have to. I'm suffocating here.”

With that, Taylor ran to her car. It didn't matter, she hadn't need to run, he wasn't chasing her anyway. She opened her car door, got in, put in reverse before she'd even thought to pull her seat belt on. She had to get away.

Drew would understand, they needed to make something of themseleves. Alone. Together it was too painful. One look at him and she remembered the way he'd cried, holding their little Annabelle in his hands.

She drove away, crying and wanting to return to him.

♥ x ♥

“Drew,” the name came out as soon as she woke. She opened her eyes, finding him there with her, and nearly sighed with relief. But he wasn't awake. She pressed her eyes shut. Her baby was gone, she sure as hell wasn't losing Drew too.

The dream, the nightmare rather, of leaving him was on her mind. She couldn't shake the thoughts that had ran through her head away. She held onto Drew and kept her eyes closed. She felt the warmth, and even now, the desire. He'd always wanted her, always loved her. Even through the pain which had blinded her, he'd wanted her. Had loved her.

Shit, she screwed up more than she knew.

“Drew, I love you,” she whispered, her voice shaking, “you have to believe me. And you have to come back to me. Please. I need you. You are, and always will be, my life. Don't leave me.”

She shifted and opened her eyes. He laid still.

She remembered the first time she'd wrote a letter to him, telling him she was okay. It'd been two weeks after she'd left him.

♥ x ♥

She sat at the motel's little desk and pulled out the pad and pen. She wrote, without thinking.

"Dear Drew,
I love you. You have to know that first, but I'm still hurting. Understand that I didn't want to pull you down with me, okay? I left you, and I'm still regretting it. I will always regret it, but I know that we can do this. We can become whoever we're meant to be. One day, Drew honey, one day we'll meet again. Maybe I will have accepted life by then. All I know is that I love you, and I miss you.

You know that ol' quote? 'Sometimes if you love something, you have to let it go. If it doesn't come back to you, it was never yours in the first place, and if it does, keep it forever.' Or something like that. Think of it like that, and know that eventually one day, I will come back to you. I don't know when, I just know I won't be able to live my life without seeing you sometime in the future.

I am safe. I am exploring the world. I will write you, since you've always been my one steady rock.

I will always love you,
Hold onto my heart for me until I get back,
Tay-Tay Bay.”

She drew a couple little hearts, barely understanding what she was telling him. Was she telling him this was temporary? Was she telling him that she was leaving him for good, only to come back as friends? What the hell did she mean? Whatever she meant, she sure hoped he understood. She slipped her necklace, the one her father had given her, with the little golden heart charm, into the envelope. It had meant the world to her, and she always told Drew that in a way, it belonged to him.

He would understand that part of it. He would know that eventually, one day, she would return to him, because no matter what, her heart belonged to him.

She licked the envelope closed and wrote his address, the one that used to be hers, on it. Who knows? Maybe she'd meet him someday on her travels...

♥ x ♥

“Drew, Drew, Drew,” she whispered his name, hanging onto it as if she was hanging on for her life. She had, somehow in the night, managed to wrap his arms around her. She felt safe, but it didn't matter. Her Drew's life was on the line.

“Come back to me,” she begged, “please. I'm begging you.”

'Let him go, Taylor' Mac's words came back to her.

“No. No. I will not let go. He's mine and he won't leave me. He won't leave me. He can't. He's mine. I love him. I'm weak without him. I'm...I need him. I don't care if that's selfish. I love him.”

♥+♥
Three Days Later
♥-♥

“What do you mean?” Taylor asked, feeling everything shift. “What do you mean you're pulling the plug! No! You can't! You can't! Why? Why would you do that?!”

“Taylor, it's been eight days. A miracle would've came by now.” The words made Taylor sick.

She ran into the room with Drew and found herself crawling in beside him. She sobbed into his shoulder and whispered, “I can't believe they're doing this to you.”

Ten minutes later, they were crowded by his family -- his mother and father holding one of his hands, his brother Mac, holding the other, and Taylor hanging onto his entire body -- and the doctor was slowly shutting off machines.

“It can't be helped,” the doctor told Taylor over her sobs, “there's too much brain damage.”

“Brain damage my ass,” Taylor whispered into Drew's ear. “I love you, baby.”

With that, she felt the easy, steadiness of his breathing slow down. She held her breath, held back her tears, and waited.

“It's done. He's gone,” the doctor said softly.

His chest rose and fell under Taylor. She felt sick with fear, and hope, “But he's still breathing.”

“That's normal, after someone's been in a coma. They can breathe on their own for a few minutes,” came the reply.

Drew coughed, and Taylor sat up straight. No one dared to breathe or make a movement. The doctor moved over and put two fingers to Drew's neck.

“Come on, baby,” Taylor whispered under her breath, “come on. You gotta wake up. Come on, Drew. Drew, please. Wake up.”

“His pulse is good,” she barely heard the doctor murmur. “Strong.”

Laughing slightly, Taylor whispered, “That's my Drew.”

Drew coughed again, a harsh sound. She knew that the doctor was waiting for Drew to give up, but he didn't know Drew at all. He hadn't grown up beside him, hadn't kissed him, shared secrets, snuck out of the house with. He hadn't fallen in deep love with him, hadn't known what it was like to look at him and know exactly what he was thinking, hadn't known what it'd been like to be held by him. Memories of them together flickered through her mind at top speed.

“Come on, Drew,” she heard Mac whisper. “Prove your brother wrong for the millionth time.”

She smiled lightly, because she'd known that's exactly what Mac had wanted. He'd wanted Drew to prove him wrong.

“Oh, please, baby,” she heard his mother's voice come, catching on a sob.

“Drew?” his father asked, slowly.

“I love you,” Taylor finally said, feeling like she needed to add something even though she'd been saying it repetitively over the past three days. “Drew,” her voice caught on a laugh, “you're family's all here. Your aunts, uncles, cousins, nephews, nieces. And me. I'm here too. You've got to wake up.”

“Don't get--” the doctor started to say.

“Your hopes up, yes, we know,” Drew's father snapped.

Drew coughed lightly this time. Leaning forward, Taylor pressed her lips to his ear and whispered, “Wake up, baby. And I'll show you a good time.”

He'd said that a lot in the early mornings of their first six-months of being newly weds. She'd always woke up to his kiss, giggling, laughing and being just plain happy.

Taylor pulled back and waited. She realized that she was slipped off the edge of the bed, and tried to stay up. When she grabbed onto Drew's leg for support, she heard a deep chuckle. A chuckle that she used to hear all the time.

Then she slipped off the bed with a loud 'thump'. Few of his family looked at her, but she knew his parents and his brother was staring at him. He was alive. Of course, he'd never died, but he'd been basically marked 'death bed'. She scrambled up onto the bed and looked at him.

His deep, but bright green eyes were staring back at her. It was a sight she'd wanted to see...for a long, long time. Way back before she'd even left him. A smile played at his lips and he tried to reach out to her. His arm was obviously stiff, so she went to him. This time when she laid in his arms and cried, she felt his arms around her, holding her tightly, and heard his hoarse whisper, “I love you too, Tay-Tay Bay.”

This time, when she cried in his arms, it was for happiness. Just like the first time he'd told her that he loved her. She hung onto him and promised him she was never letting him go. He promised her he wasn't going to let her go anyway.

♥ x ♥ + ♥ - ♥ = ♥forever


-
Epilogue
-

The first year of their renewed marriage was a little bumpy to begin with. She still melted every time she saw him, and he still woke her up with dirty and naughty promises. A few unanswered questions still needed to be answered, but it took Taylor a great deal of courage to talk to Drew about the very same thing that made her run off in the first place.

The doctors told her that yes, she could have another baby, but it would have to be strictly monitored and they would have to be extra careful. Nine months later, and Taylor gave birth to a baby girl, whom they named Naila Annabelle Bay. Taylor chalked up Naila's birth as tied with the other four best days of her life; first time Drew told her that he loved her, their first wedding and seeing his eyes open.

♥
. . . and they lived happily ever after.