Alone

I watch the world and how it moves,
gliding and sliding, flashing and splashing,
colors, sounds, emotions, words.
I see the people and how they fit, like puzzle pieces into one another,
they act, react, and pretend
that they own all, that they know all, that they are all,
But I know more about them than they think I do...

I am polite to those that say they are my friends,
but they can’t possibly understand me
or help me
they really don’t care.
I wonder why I bother 
when I truly am alone,
in a dark world full of people.

I feel cut off, like I’m in third person view,
an out of body experience, an omniscient feeling,
floating,
drifting.
Sometimes I see so much
I feel like I’m inside their heads-
I see their true colors and feel their emotions
and hear their words,
but my friends don’t care.
Why should they?

I walk alone
deep in thought, a silent observer.
I feel like an outsider,
An unwelcomed visitor,
a stranger.
Nobody really notices me.
That’s fine because
personally
watching people isn’t always pleasant.
But I’m forced to
because no one looks at me,
no one hears me,
no one feels me,
no one pays attention to me.
In an eternal blackness, the emptiness surrounds me.
It’s like I said:
I’m alone.
Utterly alone.