In That Instant

You never notice
until it's too late
that you're burning
under the florescent lights-
listening to every word he says-
believing what he tells you-
hoping that he doesn't lie--
and then you find out
that he does...

Your world is changed--
in that instant-
the non existent telephone calls-
and untyped words-
of an e-mail
that he never even meant to send.

You can't make excuses
for him any longer-
He's too busy;
depression;
work to do...

You're forced to believe
that you aren't anything
was just-
something to boost his ego-
something to take up his time
(Second hour recess
from an otherwise
crushing reality).

Still though
there's that-
admiration-
that you can't get out of your head-
your soul.

And then
You need to tell him
that he'll find-
You wilt in the light
of no affection.

Work to do;
Too busy;
Depression.