Repetition

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It wasn’t like Lily really left, she only moved into a dingy hotel 40 miles away. But she needed to teach Ryan a lesson, and give herself a break from his complicated feelings.
“I miss him.” She muttered one night as she was sitting on the grimy hotel bed, watching late night TV. There was only one time before that she had hurt him like this, and her promise to never do it again was made with blood, thick and strong. She bared her teeth and snarled. It didn’t matter. Ryan’s promises meant nothing, so that meant that hers didn’t either. Lily sat in a quiet state for several moments, finally deciding that maybe her promises did matter. Her only family left mattered. But not quite yet. This vacation wasn’t going to ruin itself.
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Another four weeks later
Lydia found Ryan slumped over a table outside of an ice- cream shop one hour before dawn.
“Oh God.” She gasped, rushing over to him with concern. She shook her head pityingly when she heard his mutters.
“She promised, she promised…” Lydia felt terrible, but she had made a promise herself. She knew where Lily was and no matter what problems they had in the past; they wouldn’t give away each other’s secrets.
“Ryan, we need to get going to my place ok? The sun’s going to be coming up soon.”
He nodded and stood up, leaning against Lydia heavily. She grunted once but held him tightly, moving at a slow pace. She gagged when Ryan turned towards her. His breath reeked of booze, cigs, and beer. There was no way that Lily wouldn’t hurt him like this anymore.
“Ryan sweetie, we need to get hurrying ok?” To Lydia’s relief, he nodded once more and picked up the pace, moving faster. There were mixed feelings in the air as Lydia led Ryan to her apartment. When they finally reached her door, Ryan puked on the floor. Lydia sighed and stroked him comfortingly, whispering in his ear. She had almost puked herself, but there was no one to stroke and coddle her. She opened the door and gently pushed Ryan inside, reminding herself to leave a message for management before she went to bed. By the time Lydia was showered and ready for bed, Ryan was sprawled on the couch in the living room, snoring quietly. Lydia smiled softly and covered him with a thin blanket, glad to see the young vampire asleep and near someone who cared about him. Today he would rest, tomorrow night, he would have a lot to explain.
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The following night, Ryan awoke with a long and grateful yawn. The previous night was a blur; the only memory was of Lydia taking him to her apartment. There was the sound of glasses clinking in the kitchenette and the pad of bare feet on the plush carpet. Lydia came around the back of the couch and sat on the edge of the coffee table, setting two empty glasses and a bottle of red liquid next to her before leaning to put her hand on Ryan’s shoulder kindly.
“How’d you sleep?” She asked, smiling warmly.
“Better than I’ve been these past couple weeks.” Ryan laughed sleepily. Lydia laughed with him and took her hand off of his shoulder, pouring a glass of the thick blood.
“I figured that wasn’t a bottle of Chardonnay .” Ryan smiled, taking a drink of the warm sticky liquid.
“You figured right!” Lydia laughed, pouring herself a glass.
“I thought you only went for the fresh stuff?” Ryan asked, setting his glass down and sitting up all of the way. Lydia smiled slyly and took a sip of the refrigerated red liquid.
“You thought wrong there. I don’t always want to go out.” She explained, “ And where I get this stuff from, I know it’s good. I never go for the cheap stuff.” Ryan raised an eyebrow in amusement before taking another sip out of the glass.
“There’s a lot to know about me.” Lydia murmured, staring at Ryan over the rim of her glass.
“I guess there is.” There was a silence as the two sat, sipping their drinks and observing each other. Finally, someone spoke, or rather, set down their glass and lunged at the other.
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Lydia Wagner knew what she wanted in life and she knew how to get it. The beautiful young woman knew her strengths and weaknesses well, and her friends could have said almost too well. She played people and read them like books, using their own weaknesses to her advantage.
At the age of 18, Lydia ran away from home, taking with her $100, a bag of clothes, and her precious stuffed teddy bear. Lydia’s father had given her the little white bear to her when she was a small child and even though she was 18, she had to have the bear near her when she slept.
She traveled to New York City, a popular destination for runaways and immigrants at the time. With no money left, Lydia was forced to use her newfound street skills to earn a living. The dangerous game caught up with her when she was 21 and Lydia lived off of the few friends she had, hidden from the police. She eventually decided to leave the city and go back home to her father, even though she didn’t want to. On her last farewell, she spent her last few dollars on a cab to her favorite club. There she met Ryan. His inhuman beauty awed her, but she took the advantage and a quick bond was made. He explained to her that he was already in a relationship and that she was quite the jealous type, but Lydia didn’t care. Mistresses weren’t uncommon those days, and as long as Lydia could stay in New York, she would do anything. Ryan took her to his place, an expensive looking apartment that obviously housed two. She ignored the empty wine glasses and a woman’s clothes strewn around the rooms, leaping at the beautiful man eagerly. He accepted her with open arms, but his strength was painful. He didn’t look as fierce in the club as he did in the apartment and Lydia was scared.
“Stop.” She cried, whimpering in fear. He stopped immediately, stepping back with a confused look in his eyes.
“What’s wrong?” He asked, concerned. Lydia felt embarrassed. 21 years old and afraid of a man that was strong.
“Nothing.” She smiled, hiding her embarrassment with false confidence. Suddenly Ryan’s face looked indifferent.
“Actually, there is something wrong.” Ryan said, looking weary and serious.
“Oh. I’m sorry.” She muttered, picking up her purse and turning towards the door.
“No!” He cried, sitting down on the arm of the couch, setting his head in his hands.
“The problem is that you’re human, love.” The muttered words had a strange accent to it. Irish, Lydia decided. The accent was something that she hadn’t heard come out of his mouth the entire night.
“Yes, I’m human, what else would I be?” Lydia asked, beyond confused,
“What else could you be? Love, you could be me.” At his last word he lifted his head to grin at her, his smile terrifying her. Long, sharp canines extended out of his gums, sparkling in the dim light like diamonds.
“What the-” She controlled her voice to a quiet tremble.
“I’m a vampire love. A creature of the night, bloodsucking fiend, that whole bit.” Ryan closed his mouth, still smiling, but only slightly. Lydia could only find the strength to nod.
“Are you ok love? You’re pretty quiet. It’s definitely better than screaming.” The vampire stared at her with wonder in his eyes.
“You aren’t scared?” He asked, still amazed.
“Yes, but I’ve seen worse.” Lydia answered, voice trembling, but eyes unwavering, “ It’s New York City sweetheart. Compared to some of the creeps I’ve seen, you’re harmless.”
Ryan laughed loudly.
“Harmless love? You make me laugh.” He glanced at the clock on the wall.
“We’re running out of time.” Ryan muttered almost to himself. He stood up from his seat on the couch’s arm and walked into the bedroom. Sound of fumbling and rustling were heard.
“Time for what?” She asked, dropping her purse to the ground with a small “thud”, following him.
“Time to change you.” He said casually, not looking up at her, “Well, bite you actually. The changing process takes longer than that.”
“Whoa Whoa Whoa, who said that I wanted to be turned?” Lydia asked. Ryan stiffened and turned, standing straight up.
“Technically no one, but I made the decision for you.” Lydia’s expression made him confused.
“That isn’t what you want?” He asked.
“No! I mean, well, I don’t know!” Lydia folded her arms across her chest, words clogging her throat. Ryan’s face looked undecided as he pondered her answer. Finally he spoke.
“Well, I think your opinion will change after it’s done.” He advanced on her, grabbing her lithe body in his strong arms, tilting her head away with one gentle, long fingered hand soothingly.
“You need to relax,” He murmured, the two long white fangs sliding out of his gums smoothly. His cool voice soothed Lydia and she immediately relaxed under his hungry embrace.
“Good. Just stay still and drink when I tell you to.” He didn’t wait for a response, digging his teeth into her throat, breaking her skin as easily as he had broken her other barriers. Ryan drank slowly, savoring the sweet honey suckle flavor. He almost drained her, leaving enough lifeblood for her to have the strength to drink from him. Ryan laid her limp body on the couch, pulling a small dagger out of a side table. Quickly he swiped it along the inside of his wrist, blood immediately rushing out of the wound. Cradling his wrist, Ryan turned back to Lydia, kneeling down on the floor beside her. Hurriedly he brought his arm to her mouth, forcing her to drink. She obeyed, drinking hungrily. Almost immediately her strength began to return and her eyes flashed open, the dazzling light blue putting Ryan in awe.
“Like the sky.” He murmured, staring into them deeply.
Ryan was intensely disappointed. Even though Lydia looked awake, she was still asleep, her body going through the process of the change. Even though their body mass was almost always more, males didn’t take as long to complete the change as females. Ryan knew he would have to keep Lydia somewhere until he changed completely. The whole changing process was different from person to person. One might feel entirely blissful for the length of the change, while another might be in extreme agony. Fortunately, Lydia slept peacefully. Ryan put her in the bedroom, tucking her in comfortably. Just as he closed the door with a quiet “click”, Lily opened the apartment’s front door. Her lips were curled into a disgusted grimace. The motion could have easily been mistaken for a snarl.
“I can smell her Ryan.” She spat, glaring at him. Ryan looked her up and down, a small smile curving his lips. The female vampire was clad in a flashy short yellow dress and she smelled like wine coolers and liquor. Her hair was pulled back in a tight bun. It hadn’t have been up for long, for the tips of her fingers were still red from pulling the rubber band. A small teardrop shaped spot of blood was resting on her cheek. Ryan strode to her swiftly and wiped it off with his index finger. He inhaled deeply, taking in the scent.
“How do you know I didn’t just kill her?” He murmured coyly, licking the drop off of his finger.
“Don’t you think I can smell your blood? Look at your wrist you idiot. You changed her! You changed a filthy little whore!” Lily slapped him across the face, her hand leaving a red imprint on his smooth cheek. With his hand to his cheek, Ryan straightened even more. He towered over Lily more than usual. She didn’t flinch.
“She’s not a whore.” He growled.
“Why not?”
“Because I want her.”
“You want her? You want her Ryan? I want a lot of people, but I want you the most!” Lily threw her small bag across the room, shattering two wineglasses that were sitting on the coffee table behind Ryan. He jerked slightly.
“So I’m not good enough?” Lily snapped, “We’ll keep her, and I’ll show you how good I really am.” Bored with him, Lily turned away from Ryan in a huff, disappearing into the bedroom where Lydia was resting. Ryan’s first instinct was to run into the room and protect Lydia, but part of him resisted, telling him to wait. Lily emerged from the room almost immediately. She had her hair hanging loosely, poorly hiding the bleeding wound on her collarbone.
“She was thirsty.” She muttered, walking into the kitchen and pulling a white wash cloth out of one of the generally bare cupboards and put it casually up to her wound. Ryan came up behind her and pulled her into a backwards embrace.
“Thank you.” He whispered into her ear, kissing the side of her head tenderly.
“Stay away from me Ryan.” Lily growled, voice thick with contained rage. Ryan obeyed, keeping his distance. The next night Lily was gone to her own apartment.
And that was that. Lily, Ryan, and Lydia. A vicious love triangle that shook them all to their cores.
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The two kissed passionately, groping and pulling on each other’s clothes and hair.
“This- Isn’t- Right!” Ryan gasped between breaths. Lydia pulled his head away from hers and looked at him with azure eyes.
“Does it have to be right?” Ryan hesitated for only a moment before locking his lips on Lydia’s once more. Under their long awaited kiss, Lydia smiled. There was no way that Lily was going to get Ryan back.
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While Lydia and Ryan were getting to know each other again, Lily was opening the door to her apartment. She had decided to come back soon after killing a guy that had looked like Ryan from behind. She hadn’t meant to kill him, no, but then he pissed her off when he turned around and blew off her flirty actions. So, as she gently opened her door, Ryan’s scent flooded her nostrils. He had spent 3 days here. Plus some. Lily smiled smugly as she sprayed Frebreeze all over her small two-room apartment. The scent of a heart broken vampire was soon overpowered by the smell of fresh laundry. Her smile was diminished when she saw that the note she had left him was still sitting, untouched, on the refrigerator. She grew fierce, grabbing the paper and tearing it to shreds, throwing it on the floor.
“Dumbass.” She cursed, regretting ever coming back to Hell in the first place. But the thought of seeing Ryan’s face when she walked through his door, wearing her sexiest outfit made her change her mind again.
After unpacking her belongings and cleaning her apartment twice, she wriggled into an extremely small and tight-fitting short black dress. She fixed her make up to accentuate her full-but-not-too-full lips and intense green eyes and put her hair in a modern, but “bay watch” style. (For some reason, that was Ryan’s favorite time period) Smiling and singing happily to her favorite songs, she hopped into her car and drove at a leisurely speed to Ryan’s expensive apartment at the edge of Hell.
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Their bodies, strong and wired with endless energy, meshed together, a blend of rumpled clothes and lacey lingerie that looked and smelled like lilacs and fresh-bloomed white roses. Soon the rumpled shirt was discarded and the groping continued. Finally, in the middle of the heated embrace, Ryan shoved the rambunctious Lydia off of him, slamming her against the opposite wall. She grinned fiercely, taking the action as a rough way to be more sexual with her. Ryan stopped her as she pounced on him again.
“No.” He gasped through fake tired breaths.
“What’s wrong?” Lydia asked, her face concerned, but her voice holding a tinge of command as she smoothed her mussed up hair.
“This isn’t right. We’ve tried this before and I don’t think it’s a good idea to try now.” Ryan worked an earnest look onto his face as he waited for Lydia to respond. The truth was that Ryan was feeling guilty. As he and Lydia pushed farther, the aching pain chewed at him, growling and eating away at his dignity and self esteem. A pang in his heart told him something that he had been waiting for for 6 long weeks.
She was close, he realized, a smile splitting his tight lips open happily in a wide grin. There was still another chance.
“Ryan? Ryan, are you still listening?” Lydia pressed. Ryan shook his head and chuckled.
“Yeah, I’m here babe, but not for long. I have to get home, there’s something I have to take care off.” He kissed Lydia one last time before throwing his shirt on and running out of the door, leaving Lydia to sit on her couch in her skimpy lingerie, wondering if her “charm” was disappearing.
“Damn.” She muttered. $40 dollars for the whole “outfit” wasn’t going to magically reappear in her bank account. Lily was close, she knew it, and Ryan wasn’t coming back without that bitch she called her friend being right at his side.
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Lily’s good mood was ruined when Ryan didn’t answer his door. He obviously wasn’t home, and the sun was coming up in a couple of hours. His car was in the parking garage, so coming home was going to take longer than usual, so she was going to have to wait another day or more for him to come back. That just wasn’t going to happen. Gas money wasn’t a thing to waste these days even if there was millions of dollars just waiting to be spent in her bank account and safe deposit box. That meant spending the day in Ryan’s spacious lonely apartment until he returned. She hated the expensive apartment, it was so big and dark all of the time. And being a “creature of the night” didn’t mean she always liked dark and gross things. That was a rumor she had always despised. As she pulled his key out of a mysterious spot in her dress, she wondered what she was going to say when they spoke again for the first time in a month and a half. The thought pondered her as she opened the door and walked inside, becoming shocked by the scent of cigarettes and alcohol. He never smoked in his apartment; Lily always told him that the scent was horrid. And alcohol was never an issue either: Ryan never drank unless he was worried. And the smell told her that he was very worried. The guilt hit her hard then. She caused him strife and misery beyond anything she had ever done before.
“Oh, wait…” She paused her self-induced guilt trip and realized that this wasn’t the first time. Brazil was worse. So much worse.
Brazil was a time that Lily hoped she would forget, but seeing Ryan’s face everyday sent a wave of memories crashing down. She wished for forgiveness, but it never came. The years only sent more pain and the longer she thought about it, the worse it became.
Sitting in Ryan’s bathtub, soaking away her troubles with lavender scented bubbles made everything ok. Her apartment didn’t have a bathtub unfortunately; there was no room for it. So frequently she came to Ryan’s lush apartment to relax and chat with him about long ago. Sighing tiredly, she eased herself out of the wide porcelain tub, unplugged the drain and got into the shower to wash off all of the makeup, perfume, and hairspray that just wasn’t her away. She was just wrapping up rinsing the shampoo out of her hair when she heard the sound of the front door slam. She hurriedly finished rinsing and turned the shower off, wrapping a towel around her tightly, brushing her hair with her fingers. She listened quietly to the sounds of Ryan running towards the master bathroom door. She threw it open before he reached it and was swept up into strong, sweaty, Lydia smelling arms. Ryan laughed into Lily’s wet hair, squeezing her tightly. She winced as two of her ribs cracked warningly, but she held her towel up with one hand and stroked Ryan with the other.
“Oh babe, I missed you!” He said softly, running his long fingers through her hair with a ferocity that only Lily could bear and enjoy.
“I missed you too.” Lily replied through gritted teeth, trying to smile through the pain and hold Ryan with one hand. He seemed to get the hint and let her go sheepishly.
“Sorry babe.”
Lily laughed quietly and gently pushed Ryan out into the room so she could get changed. She got dressed in a pair of tight sweat pants and a tank top that she had left in one of Ryan’s spare closets. After semi drying her hair, she came into the bedroom to find that Ryan was also clean and was sporting fresh clothes. Lily smiled when she sniffed the air and found that it did not smell like smoke and alcohol. The only threatening scent that lingered was Lydia’s perfume. It sickened her, but she held her smile proudly and slid into the bed, stretching her body across the plush pillows at the head of the large bed. Ryan grinned and with the grace of a panther, he launched himself into the air and his face landed just inches away from Lily’s. She giggled and pulled his face to hers, settling a gentle kiss on his cheek. Almost all was forgiven.
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20 minutes later, they were lounging on the couch in the living room.
“Don’t leave me again. Please, don’t.” Ryan murmured ever so softly, still stroking Lily’s hair. There was a thick silence as Lily thought everything over. Finally, the silence was broken.
“Only if you promise never to touch Lydia again. You’ve tried that before, and no matter where you are or how much you try to clean and wipe out her scent, I’ll know it’s there. If you really care about me as much as you say you do, then it won’t be as hard as it sounds. Ok? Do you promise?” Lily was serious, Ryan knew that, and even though it would hurt the both of them if she left, she would in a heartbeat if a promise as big as this one was broken. In an instant he said “yes” and twisted her around to face him and kissed her passionately. His fangs poked out of his gums hungrily. Even though Ryan was much older, he had less control than Lily did, and that always seemed to be one of his downfalls. But tonight, it was his strength, a symbol of lust and a long buried passion that he could finally release. Lily loved it and returned the lustful bites with her own pearly white fangs. A knock on the door interrupted their steamy reunion.