Scars

                                                    scars
Look at my skin and you will see the scars.All the scars tell a story.A story of pain, heartache, and bitterness.You left a group of scars on me. Not all of them are bad but each and every one of them has effected me in one way or anotherYou want to see the scars? You should know all about them. You are the one who made themyes, you! You were the one holding the blade guiding it across my armin the zig zag pattern you have made in my heart called your love.Im getting to involved.I cant get involved its not allowed.But when im alone all i can think about is you. I pace around daydreaming.But i cant daydream its not allowed because daydreaming means a wondering mind and a wondering mind means you are again at the handle of the blade.Tell me you love me again and pull the blade over the same path as you have time and time again.Watch the blood flow, pour in the salt and make me feel fucked again.The way you make me feel when you cut,it is not the "normal" feeling of cutting.I get a certain type of enjoyment out of it.Watch the scars pile up and you still cut me without mercy. Tell me you care then break my heart and poison my mind, make me feel as though im nothing, just a figment of your imagination.Will it ever change or get better? Will you ever pull the blade across for the last time?Will you ever let me go from your grasp? And tell me that you will no longer hurt me?But I think that is to much to ask, it seems as though you need me there to show somebody even if its just me that you have the upper hand in my life. You need to let go of all your pain and Im your only way out. My arm seems to be your only scapegoat.Take a look at my arm, do you see one space that is not covered with scars? When im not with you the day is a blur. I sit and think of you, and when i think of you my sleeve starts to turn red, BLOOD RED. This time i cannot cover it. Its running to fast and wont stop, i start to feel light headed and dizzy. As i look at the blood start to pool at my feet i find it amazing that no-one has figured out that i might be dying.As the world starts to go black and i take my final breath i think of you one last time.I found it is true: love can kill you.