Imagine This Long Journey

Imagine the long
journey from midnight
where we grow layers
to cover us as we
madly erase the
fiction of our lives.

Imagine the long journey
into light knowing that
as night melts away
you, all of you, may see
all of me - and I, all of you;
and you (all of you) may
then choose to erase the
truth I believe is me.
forever and ever,
amen.

Imagine my long journey
dragging the history of women
which imagines the story of me:
forgotten beginnings entwined
become nameless fears and longings,
become demons twisted into
the sins of my making.

Too long entombed by
your story, I fear
your imaginings are
my immutable reality

Imagine my long journey
carrying this question: who
am I,  before you existed?
And, what if  I do not exist
outside your story?
what if  I disappear into all of you.
forever and ever, amen.

Dare to dream differently
Dare to imagine waking the demons,
making allies of their yearning.
I do not know if I am planning
redemption or merely
calculating madness: 
I will dance a counterpoint to hissing;
wake & weave the sins you tie to
the thought of me, until all is unbraided
and I am free. 

It is you I will expose, but will you see?
I expect nothing less than death

Imagine this long journey:
the desperate longing
to become real.

To be known and still to be loved:
this is everything!