Once

Word count 1023



“Once,"

Just once Tobias’ thoughts mirrored. Just one time would the world be what he remembered, what he dreamed.

A stream of people flowed around him making an island out of him on the sidewalk. Tobias placed his dirt smudged hand on his forehead, his head hurt from the ruddy orange hue of the world. The colour had crept into his consciousness as the day had worn on, it had not been this way before. He exhaled a sulphurous breath and pulled his dirty overcoat around his frame. The thick layers of clothes beneath his overcoat gave him the appearance of mass, his 110 pounds of bone and skin spoke of a different man, a broken man. Tobias told his legs to move. They slowly creaked into motion and dragged his body towards the alley from where he came. He looked back over his shoulder at the orange reflections cast by the glass skyscrapers and like a ghoul retreating into a tomb he moved into the shadows.

The world stuttered and blurred from his awareness as he stepped behind the dumpster and slid down the wall. Tobias reached behind the rusty blue dumpster and produced a dirty bottle wrapped in a plastic bag. He unscrewed the cap and felt his guts churn from the anticipated swallow. He put the bottle to his lips and gulped down the rest of the toxic mixture, none of meant for human consumption. The bite of the drink screwed up his face for a brief moment until the warm concoction burned its way into his belly. His mouth watered and his throat tightened he was going to be sick. He held himself stiff until the feeling passed and he grew light headed and unbalanced. Nauseas warmth flowed from the swirling in his head and radiated throughout his body usurping what little control he had over himself.

A melange of noises rose and fell over Tobias from the city around him. He propped himself up on the wall with his mouth open and his cheek pressed firm against the dirty bricks trying to reason with the cacophony that assaulted him. He concentrated hard dragging his vision back from the spinning vortex for brief moments before it was pulled back in to the chaos. Tobias staggered forward colliding with the dumpster head first as his arms collapsed uselessly under his forward momentum. A thick buzzing noise covered his entire being as arcs of mind numbing pain shot threw his head. Nothing made sense as he pawed at the ground in front of him, white noise filled his head and static bled threw his vision.

        Tobias opened his eyes and moved his hands to his head. Pain rippled down his scalp as he fingered the wound.

“Ahhhh, shit.”

He exhaled and puffed dirt into his eyes. Tobias rolled himself onto his side to rub his eyes, the movement encouraged spasms of pain from his wounded head. He smacked his tongue trying to encourage some moisture in his mouth to combat the dry fuzzy feeling and to distract himself from the throbbing.

Tobias new the need for water would grow. He lied still until he could no longer hold out and the prospect of the pain from movement had to be overcome for a drink. Tobias steeled himself against the pain and lumbered to the edge of the alley. He gripped the edge of the brick building and pulled a hood over his head from under his overcoat.

Tobias staggered out from the alley into the dusk, a violet haze radiated from the sky above him.

“Fucking colours,” Tobias groaned.

He stumbled towards a small park where a water fountain was located. The noise of people reached Tobias from around the corner. He turned his head towards the ground to avoid being seen. A flood of bright colors and light hurt his eyes as the voices neared him. He placed his hand over his brow to shield himself from the lights. As the group of people were on top of him he stumbled from the overpowering lights and colors onto the street.

“Are you OK man?”

Tobias looked directly at the voice and reeled backwards further into the street.

“Stay Back!”

A group of figures were encased in radiating colors. White light condensed at a distance from the prismatic auras, Tobias gapped, awestruck by the vision. He fell to his knees with his hands raised in fear in front of himself.

“Don’t touch me!”

“Don’t worry douche bag, touching you isn’t high on my list of things to do.”

A chorus of laughter flowed from the group as they moved off. Tobias stared with his mouth open following the glowing group.

Tobias pulled his hood tight around his face and ran towards the park catching fleeting images of his pathway. A tall oak stood at the entrance to the park backlit by a strange undulating glow.

Tobias stopped, “No! This is not the way it’s supposed to be.”

Tobias felt his world melting away as he stared at the streaming colors and lights.

A crowd moved around a stage deeper in the park. Tobias approached the edge of the park and stared at the vibrant colours swirling and merging in front of the stage. Tears ran down Tobias’ face, this wasn’t real, his body shivered from the flood of emotion. The forgotten pains pricked at the edge of Tobias’ consciousness, a small girl twirled in streaming colours and shooting lights by the fountain.

Tobias walked with his hand outstretched, mouth open and tears streaking his dirty face. She was so beautiful, so bright. He staggered at the girl unconscious of the world around him.

His breath sucked out of him as someone slammed into him from behind. Tobias crashed to the ground head first colliding hard with the pavement. Rough hands pulled him around and a face swirled in and out of focus as a screaming man came into focus.

Tobias’ head listed and the words slid around him. Tobias stared at the little girl clinging to a woman’s leg, all the colors washed away, replaced with the hard images of reality.