Breaking Point

Sensing impending doom, Sara tried to hide behind the large oak tree. As withered as her small body was, one of its branches would have worked adequately. The wailing of the sirens grew closer but she wasn’t about to let them take her. The ambulance flew by and left Sara hiding in silence. It didn’t fool her, though. She made her way toward the house hiding behind a bush or tree every few steps. It felt like she was a spy on a mission.

Anna watched the embarrassing display from the kitchen window. She shook her head in disgust as she began making dinner. If there was a God, he would have mercy on her by not allowing anyone from school to witness her mother’s insanity. Junior high might be perfect for her if her mother didn’t continually embarrass her. The other kids thought they had it bad until they realized who gave birth to her. Apparently, a normal mom whose greatest method of embarrassment is kissing you goodbye in front of everyone was too much to ask for.

"Hey, Princess, what’s wrong?” Bradley asked. He gave her a warm hug as he joined her in the kitchen.

“What do you think? That crazy woman is at it again,” Anna replied and turned back to her dinner preparations. Bradley didn’t need to look out the window to understand what his daughter meant. He hated seeing Sara like that, so he just didn’t look. That wasn’t the Sara that he married. The Sara he loved was full of life. Her blue eyes always sparkled with some kind of mischief and her long chocolate locks always smelled of flowers and honeysuckle perfume. The woman out there with the shriveled up body and the limp, over dyed, yellow hair was a stranger.

“Anna Morgan, I don’t want to hear you talk like that! She is your mother.” His voice wasn’t in the least bit harsh and he knew he hadn’t fooled his daughter. He still flinched when Anna whirled around to face him with anger flashing in her eyes. She looked so much like the old Sara it was almost scary.

“That woman out there. That woman whose brain cells are so fried from too much meth that she thinks aliens are out to get her or something is NOT my mother! My mother died when she came to my school play high as a kite! I don’t have a mother!” Anna screamed. She turned back to the stove with a tear in her eye. It was quickly wiped away before even her father could see it.

“Here, let me do that. You go do homework or something. Go be a kid,” Bradley said, taking the dry spaghetti out of her hands. He smiled and ruffled her hair.

“Isn’t that something a mother should be doing?” Anna asked before walking out of the room.

“Listen here, Kid, you know I always have cooked better than your mother!” he called after her. Soon after Anna’s exit, Sara burst through the kitchen door. Her face was red and those lovely blue eyes of hers were wild and bloodshot. Her whole frame shook more violently than a Parkinson’s patient. Bradley gave an exhausted sigh.

“You told them, didn’t you?” Sara screamed.

“Told who, what?” This was beginning to grate on his nerves.

“You told them! You told them where I was and now they’re after me!” She lunged toward him but his reflexes were much quicker. Sara landed sprawled in the floor. Bradley felt bad for about two minutes. It ended when their four-year old son, Alex, wandered into the room with Anna at his heels.

“Daddy, what’s Mommy doing in the floor?” Alex asked. Bradley froze and felt his heart break at the concerned expression on his tiny son’s face. Someone so small should never know such big worry.

“Oh, nothing’s wrong Buddy. Mommy’s just looking for her contact. Right, Mommy?” Bradley said, giving Sara the sternest obey me look at his pitiful wife who was picking herself up off the floor.

“Alex! Oh, Alex Baby!” Sara cried, holding out her arms and moving to sweep him up in her arms. It was as if she thought she had not seen him in ages. He backed away and wrapped his little arms around his sister’s leg. Anna leaned down and picked him up, holding him tightly like a protective mother.

“That’s funny, Sara doesn’t wear contacts,” Anna said, “Come on, Alex, let’s go watch TV.” Dinner was quiet. Sara never ate with them anyway. As usual, she passed out on the sofa in an awkward position. Anna remained angry but she did help her father put Sara to bed.

“It won’t be like this forever, Princess,” he said when they were parting ways for the night.

“Wake up, Dad, Sara is not going to magically change back into Mom. My mother and your wife doesn’t exist anymore. The meth killed her and maybe one day we will get lucky and it will kill finish the job,” Anna said, “I love you too, though.”

Sometimes his daughter amazed him with her insights. What she said kept him awake all night. It wasn’t hard to see that she was right. Sara wasn’t going to just decide one day to put everything bad out of her life and come back to her family. There was no way he could keep living like he was and his children shouldn’t have to live the way they were. Anna should be chatting on the phone and have sleepovers with other girls her age. Friends should be in and out of the house but he knew she would never bring people home with her mother acting the way she was.

The next morning, he sent Anna off to school and drove Alex to daycare while Sara was still asleep. When he returned, Sara had finally awakened and getting ready to leave the house. Her eyes didn’t have the animalistic look anymore so his guess was that she had run out of whatever supply she had hidden.

“Come here and sit down, Sara.” He grabbed her arm and pulled her to the table. Though she tried to resist, he was able to make her do what he wanted. Alex fought harder at bath time than she was able to.

“Let me go! You can’t tell me what to do! Let me go!” Sara screamed.

“You are going to sit here and listen to me or I’m calling the police and they’ll get you for use of a controlled substance and possession,” he replied. Sara glared at him but listened. “I can’t go on like this. The kids can’t go on like this. They need a mother, not some crazy woman pretending to be a spy in the front lawn.” He ran his hands through his thick black hair. Though he was a lucky man in that there was no sign of a receding hairline, it was prematurely graying. “You have two choices, so you best be listening close.” With a nod of her head, she indicated that she was listening. The anger was still there but it had begun to wane. “You can go into rehab and get clean for good or you can keep using and lose everything. I will file for divorce, kick you out into the street, and take sole custody of Alex and Anna.” It hurt to say those things to her, especially when she started to cry. The tears brought a glimpse of the old Sara with them. It had to be done, though, and he meant every word.

“No, please don’t. Please don’t leave me. Please don’t take my babies away,” Sara pleaded. Tears streamed down her face and she reached out for him. Her bony arms wrapped around him but he stayed as still as a statue.

“What are you willing to do? Are you going to stop doing this to yourself and to us? Forever?” Bradley asked.

“Yes, yes, I’ll do anything!” She tightened her arms around him. The river of tears she still shed dampened the shoulder of his shirt. Finally, he sighed with relief and rose from the table. Neither of them spoke as he guided her to the car. Her things were already packed and loaded. Although Sara was silent throughout the journey to the treatment center Bradley had contacted early that morning. It was difficult to fight the tears as he walked his wife inside.

The nurses were sweet and gentle in dealing with Sara. Amazingly, Sara surrendered her things willingly and the counselor assured Bradley they would take good care of his wife. Sara and Bradley hugged each other warmly before they had to part ways. Her frame was so thin Bradley was afraid to hold her too tight. It was much worse than it had looked.

“I love you, Sara, I know you can do this,” he whispered.

“Thank you,” she replied with a look of love in her eyes for the first time in years. The nurses took Sara’s hand to escort her to the detox room, leaving Bradley behind starring after them. Finally, he knew everything would be okay again.