First Writer's Block

This blank page stares back at me. I know, thanks to many years in the American education system, that a blank paper on a smudgy computer screen can not taunt me. Still it seems to do just that. It’s laughing in my face. This is what I want to do with my life, but this inanimate pixelation has defeated me. It stands in the way of my entire plan. I can see where I need to go, what I need to do. If only there wasn’t this thing, this monster stopping me from accomplishing all my goals.

It has no feelings, no discernible figure, no voice, no anything. It doesn’t have life. It might as well be a pebble or any number of other inanimate objects in this universe. However it continues to block my path. It’s a mouse and I am the frightened elephant, unable to see a path past this foreign creature without changing paths entirely. It looks up and smiles at me, knowing what I am.

Who is this thing to intrude upon my life and plans? Does it really think it can just walk in and sabotage everything? The idea of this all seemed so simple in theory. How simpler can it be than to write? I have read books, poetry, plays, articles, essays, and the list goes on. What I saw did not look so difficult to create. No one ever warned me about this lion. My arrogance and naivety are shameful.

But is this creature foreign or something else? Could this monster actually be…me? This page doesn’t have life, a voice, or anything for that matter. The only one throwing obstacles in my path is me. I am the one who is a perfectionist. I am the one who wants to write the next masterpiece. I am the one who is not willing to dive in and perhaps make a fool out of myself for the sake of learning my craft. My fingers are the fingers that don’t move. My brain is the one that second guesses and self-destructs itself at every possible opportunity. 

No one could warn me about this demon because it resides inside of me. This culprit, now that it has been identified, will be brought to justice. Through hard work, dedication, and probably a lot of coffee, this giant will be conquered. Without slaying the dragon you do not get the princess. I suppose this peasant has a long journey ahead.