"here," she handed the necklace to the other. "now, hold it like this," she demonstrated, holding the end of the wire between two tabs which were intended to be pushed down, restraining the beads. Although her fingers were quite thin, she always felt they were large and clumsy because there wasn't a trace of elegance to be found. just chewed bone and raw cuticles. "here, yea," she giggled as her fingers fumbled with the others. "now, just ... this is so frustrating. how was one person supposed to do this?" The other answered the rhetorical question with a shrug and a smile as she tried to keep the wire steady enough for the other to close the first tab on the right hand side with rusty plyers. She was standing on the other's right and attempted to close the tab located on the left side of the wire. "No, you're going to have to go on the other side," the other stated. She walked to the other's left. The pressue was on. This was the product of the past four hours. Endless free episodes of THE OFFICE buzzed in and out of both ears while she strung and restrung the beads of previous necklaces she no longer cared for. Transparent reds, wooden browns, oval blacks, tiny circular golds, on and off on and off. Countless beads were slipped onto the wire by her fumbling fingers for four hours. Michael Scott, the Dunder Mifflin paper company, Jim & Pam, everyone was there and had , without realizing, witness one of the more tedious, and yet, successful creative endevours she had taken on. There isnt much of a beginning other than a sperm cell and and egg. there was, of course, the nine months, in which, considering the strange cravings she had on a regular basis, may have been even stranger for the person she essentially came from. essentially? DID come from. Other than the cut of an umbilical chord, covered in placenta, and smacked on the bum, there is no other beginning. for, we do not begin again. we are led to different places, revisit the old, embark on new adventures, but we never begin again. Humans like to imagine things as being a new beginning and somehow have this notion that things will be different in these new places. What brought her more peace of mind, more than anything ever had, was realizing that coming back, everything would be the same. She wouldn't be a completely different person, she couldn't expect more from herself just because her different bed was in a different room than it had been for the past ten months, and that there wouldnt be anyone sleeping next to her, like there had been for almost the entirety of the past ten months. |