Master Thief II

Master Thief II

In a suburban city, there was a father of three sons. They were in extreme debt, and the sons did little to help. The father had enough. What he should have said was “OK, you three need to leave this home, and get a job.” But he really said “GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE, YOU FREELOADERS!” The sons were kicked out of their own home, and on to the streets. I don’t know what happened to the other two sons, I think they died. Anyways, the youngest son, whose name was Rob, wandered the streets of the suburban city, in search of a shelter.

Rob wandered the streets for what seemed like days, turned out to be four hours; he finally found an abandoned warehouse. He walked inside, and it was completely empty, save for a few crates and a broken coffee machine. Rob found a small office, and a couch. He rested on the coach, and fell asleep. He was then waked up by a metallic clicking noise that was close to him. He opened his eyes, and three men, one holding a gun pointing at Rob, were standing there. Rob asked “Who are you?”

The man with the gun replied “The guys who are going to kill you, for trespassing on our property.” He then put his figure on the trigger.

“Hold it!” Rob shouted. “Maybe we could work something out, I scratch your back, you scratch mine kind of deal?” Rob negotiated. The men turned around, and whispered quietly to each other.

It was five minutes later that they turned around, and said “OK, what can you offer us?”

“I could become your lackey, I can do stuff to help you guys out.” Rob spoke.

“Do you know what we do, kid?” one man spoke. “We’re thieves, see? We don’t need a kid to babysit.”

“I can take the heat from the police, or distract them, or maybe even throw them off?” Rob offered, desperate not to die.

The men turned around and whispered again. Another five minutes pass, and they turn around and say, “OK, you’ve got a deal. But, in order to become our lackey, you must prove yourself that you are capable of stealing something without getting caught.”

“OK, where do I go, and what do I take?” Rob asked.

“There is an auto body shop just down the street. The owner has three vintage, extremely rare motorcycles. They’re worth thousands, but the owner wouldn’t sell them for any amount. And the guy is cheap, very cheap. So, what you have to do is go there, steal the motorcycle, and bring it back here.” The men explained.

Rob said “OK, sounds easy enough.”

“BUT! You can’t hurt the owner in anyway, and you can’t get noticed.” The men added.

“OK, still sounds pretty easy.” Rob said confidently.

Before Rob went off to the body shop, he noticed a pair of broken sunglasses on the desk. One of the lenses was shattered, but the other lens was perfectly fine. He broken the other half the shattered part off, and took the other half with him. Rob went to the body shop, and saw the motorcycles on display. They were clamped in, but it would be easy to unclamp. The owner was working on a vehicle, but he could easily see the motorcycles. Rob threw a rock near him, and made it seem like it came from a different direction. The owner walked off in a direction away from Rob. Rob then ran toward the vehicle the owner was working on, and placed the sunglasses near it. Rob then ran back, and the owner came back.

“Damn, kids.” He mumbled. He then noticed the half sunglasses. “Hey, that’s a nice lens. Shame it’s only half.” He turned to the vehicle and mumbled “I’ll work on this tomorrow, it’s an easy fix.” The owner then walked into his office. Rob ran to the vehicle, and picked up the sunglass. He then snuck by the office, placed the broken sunglasses by the door. He then knocked on the door, and hid under an upside down cardboard box. The owner came out, and mumbled a curse. He then saw the broken sunglasses. “Hey, it’s the other half.” He picked it up, and examined it. “It’s in a good shape, and looks easy to fix, I bit of duct tape. But it needs the other half.” He ran to the vehicle he was working on, but it wasn’t there. “I could have sworn it was here, maybe it was moved by the wind. It’s got to be around here.” The owner then searched all around for the other half of the sunglasses. When he wasn’t looking, Rob unclamped one of the motorcycles, and without turning it on, he moved it down the street towards the abandon warehouse. An hour later, the owner gives up on the sunglasses, and notices that one of the motorcycles. “WHAT THE HELL!!!!!! WHERE’S MY BIKE!!!!” The owner shouted.

“OK, here’s the motorcycle you wanted.” Rob said. The thieves were impressed.

“W-wow, good job, kid. It must’ve been difficult.” One of the thieves said.

“Pfft…it was a piece of cake, the guy is an idiot.”

“Well, if you thought it was so easy, then steal another one. And if you do, you will become one of us, an equal.” Another thief said.

“You’ve got yourself a deal.” Rob agreed.

“Still the same rules as last time, you can’t hurt the guy, nor can you get noticed.”

“Whatever, I wasn’t planning to.” Rob said very confidently.

Before Rob left, he found a small bag, filled with pennies. He took the bag with him, and went to the body shop. Once he got there her saw the owner, sitting in front of the remaining motorcycles on a lawn chair, armed with a rifle. Rob snuck behind the body shop, and shifted by the wall to the front. The owner was sitting there, looking at one direction, with very intense eyes. Rob started to place pennies in a row, which lead behind the shop. Once it was completely behind the shop, Rob ran back to the front. He made a noise to get the owners attention; the owner turned his way, and saw a penny. Then the cheapskate part of his brain turned on. “Hey! A Penny!” he said out loud. Rob heard this and ran around to the other side. The owner walked up to it, and saw the line of pennies. “Sweet!” The owner shouted, and started to collect pennies one by one, and counting them. Meanwhile, Rob ran to the front, and unclamped the second motorcycle, and walked it back to the abandoned warehouse. The owner came back, happy as a lion catching its prey, and his pockets were filled with pennies. He then noticed that the second motorcycle was missing. “WHY!? WHY GOD WHY!? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME!?” He shouted and fell to his knees.

“Here you go, gentlemen. The second motorcycle.” Rob said in a cocky tone. The thieves were shock by this.

“You killed him, didn’t you?” one of the thieves asked.

“Physically, no. Mentally, probably.” Rob said.

“And you had no trouble?” another asked.

“It didn’t feel like stealing anymore, it was like he was just giving it to me.” Rob responded.

“Un-fricken-believable.” The other thief mumbled. “Do it again.” He said. “If you do it again, we will make you our leader.”

Rob was interested. “Alright, I’ll steal the last one, and if I do I get to be your leader.”

“Same rules, different deal. “

This time Rob asked one of the thieves for a baklava, and on his way to the body shop he picked up a rock. Once he got there, he saw the owner with a six pack of energy drinks. “Perfect.” Rob thought. He put on the baklava, and walked right up to the shop. The owner looked at him, and Rob threw the rock at a window in the body shop.

“WHAT THE HELL!? GET BACK HERE YOU LITTLE ****** YOU DAMN ********** YOU *** ** * *****!” The owner yelled and cursed at Rob, and chased him all around the body shop. It was about 30 minutes of running, and the owner crashed. Rob checked to see if he’s OK, he just fell asleep. Rob walked to the final motorcycle, unclamped it, and walked it back to the warehouse.

Once Rob got back, the thieves weren’t in the warehouse. He looked in the office, and saw a note. It said “Kid, we watched you take the last motorcycle, we don’t want you as our leader. You can have the building, the motorcycles, and the stuff we stole before. We’re going to get real jobs, because you showed us that even kids can become Master Thieves. So, good luck in life. The Guys who tried to kill you.”

Rob found their stash of stole goods, which wasn’t much, a tire, a TV, and what’s left of an iPod. But Rob had three shiny and vintage motorcycles so that made up for it. He also got the warehouse, where he can stay for shelter. Rob has finally found his profession, to become a thief. Rob stayed the night in the warehouse.

The next day, Rob went to the Body Shop. He found the owner sitting on his lawn chair, drinking what Rob assumes is coffee, he walked up to the owner and said “Hey, pal. You OK?”

“No…I’m not. My pride and joy were stolen yesterday, I tried calling the police, but I have a record with them. And I have the greatest headache from all that Red Bull.” The owner mumbled.

“What if I told you, I know where the bikes are?” Rob said.

The owner mumbled, “Then I’ll give you 50 Grand, for each motorcycle you find.”

“Deal.” Rob said.

The owner became confused, “What you talking about, boy?”

“I know where the bikes are, and I’m just agreeing with your terms.” Rob explained.

“…You’re screwing with me.” The owner said.

“Come with me to prove it.” Rob offered.

They went to the abandoned warehouse, and the bikes were sitting there.

“Oh…my…god…You have them here.” The owner mumbled.

“I found them here.” Rob lied.

The owner then pulled out his check book, and wrote “$150,000” to a…”What’s your name, son?” the owner asked.

“Rob <last name is covered for federal reasons>.” Rob said.

The owner wrote the check, gave it to Rob, and took his motorcycles back to the body shop.

“Well, I have a profession that I am good at. I got paid a great amount, now all I need is someone to motivate me the stay alive. And that someone is my neighbor.” Rob spoke to himself. Before Rob was abruptly kicked out of his home, he had neighbors. A former military soldier and his family. But Rob was interested in the soldier’s daughter. Rob’s new mission is to get his neighbors daughter to become his girlfriend, maybe more. But the person standing in the way is the soldier.

Rob went to his father’s home and knocked on the door. When he answered he should of said “Yes?” What he really said was “WHATEVER YOU’RE SELLING I AIN’T BUYING!” his father yelled.

“Always a pleasure seeing you too, Dad.” Rob said.

“Oh. Rob, what are you doing here? I thought I made it clear that—“

“I just came for a visit. I now have a profession that I am good at, and it pays well.” Rob interrupted.

“Oh? And what is that?” He asked.

“Dad, I have become a thief.” Rob said.

“No seriously.”

“Seriously.”

“You’re screwing with me.”

“Why would I lie about a situation like this?” Rob asked.

“...Holy Hell, you’ve become a thief.” He gapped. “OK, what have you stolen, and how much is it worth?”

“I stolen three extremely rare motorcycles, and returned them for the amount they are worth…each.”

“And that is?” He asked.

“In total, $150,000.”

Rob’s father was silent.

“I’ve come back, because I need a place to stay for a few days until I find an place to live.” Rob explained.

Rob’s father just gestured him inside.

“And I need a favor.” Rob said.

“Sure, you’ve become semi-successful, I’m proud of you.” He obliged

“I need you to talk to the neighbor, about me and his daughter being together.” Rob explained.

“Why don’t you do it yourself?”

“He won’t listen to me, but he will if you talk.”

“But he thinks you’re still a freeloader.”

“Tell him, my profession.”

“Like that will work.”

“You won’t know until you try, right?”

“…OK, Fine. I’ll talk to him.”

Awkward Silence.

“Now.”

“OH! Now. OK.”

Rob’s father goes to the neighbors. He knocks on the door, and the soldier answers.

“What do you want, <Last name covered for federal reasons>?” The soldier mumbled.

“Uh…Hey, Bill. How’s it going?” Rob’s Father stuttered.

“Fine. What do you want?” Bill mumbled.

“Uh..you know my son?” He asked.

“Which one, that fat and lazy one, the dumb and lazy one, or the smart and lazy one?” Bill joked.

“Er…the young one.”

“So…the smart and lazy one?” Bill asked.

“Yeah.”

“What about him?”

“I was wondering if he could ask your daugh—“

“NO! Out of the question. None of your sons will lay a hand on my daughter.” He growled.

“B-b-b-but, Rob has a career! And it pays extremely well.” Rob’s father explained.

“Really? What is it.”

“Well…uh…how do I say it?” Rob’s father mumbled.

“Get on with it!” Bill roared.

“He’s a thief! Don’t hurt me.” Rob’s father whimpered.

“A thief? Isn’t that…Illegal?”

“Yes…but he gave it back, and he got paid for giving it back.”

“…what difference does it make?” Bill asked.

“…I haven’t gotten that far yet.”

“OK then, he can date her. But he must prove that he is a Master Thief.”

“How?”

“He has to steal the dog tag from my neck, then he can date my daughter.”

“I ACCEPT!” Rob shouted from next door.

“Hmm…Good, now then. Get off my property.” Bill growled

“Can do.” Rob’s father said as he walked off.

Rob had thought of a plan from the instant he accepted. He went to his medicine cabinet, and found a bottle of sleeping pills. He took a few and he waited for the right moment.

It was about an hour later, that he saw Bill working out in his backyard. Rob snuck into his backyard, without being noticed and hid in the shrubs. He saw Bill’s water bottle, and he decide to go for it. Bill was facing the other direction, so Rob just move quietly towards the bottle. He unscrewed the cap, and dropped the pills into it. He screwed it back on, and quietly moved back to the shrubs. He sat there for awhile. Bill done a set of exercises and grabbed his bottle of water. He drank from it, and all the pills went down. A few moments later, Bill was asleep on the grass, snoring away. Rob took the opportunity to take Bill’s dog tag. He then walked home, as if nothing happened.

It was the next day, when Bill came to the door. Rob answered it, and said “Howdy, Neighbor.” With a big smile on his face.

“I want my dog tag back.” He mumbled.

“Well, I want your daughter, but I have this nagging feeling that it’s not happening.” Rob countered.

“You just drugged me, anybody could have done that. This time I want you to steal something living.” Said Bill.

“Oh? And what do you have in mind. Your daughter?” Rob suggested.

“Hell no! I want you to try stealing our cat.” Bill explained.

“…You have a cat?”

“Got it last week, not important. Anyways, yes. I want you to steal our cat.”

“Fine, when I steal your cat. I get to be with your daughter. Deal?”

“Deal.”

Rob went in for a shake of hands, but Bill had already left.

It was around evening, when the family next door ordered a pizza. Rob noticed the delivery guy, and took advantage of the opportunity. Rob went outside quickly, and spoke with the guy. “Hey, pal!”

“What? I’m busy.” The guy growled.

“Let me pay for the pizza. And I’ll by that vest off you.”

“But this is my uniform.” The guy explained.

“So…50 bucks?” Rob offered.

“Deal.”

The guy gave him the pizza and the vest, and Rob paid him the pizza money and the vest money.

“Pleasure doing business with you.” Rob thanked him.

“Whatever.” And the guy drove off.

Rob put on a big, 80’s style glasses, to cover his facial features. He put of the vest, and rang the doorbell.

Bill answered. “Yes?”

“Here’s your pizza, that’ll be $14.70, and a tip would be nice.” He asked.

“Uh…hang on. Come inside, its cold.” Bill offered.

Rob walked inside, and saw his target instantly. Once Bill had gotten out of sight, Rob put down the pizza, grabbed the cat, and left.

The next day, Bill came to the door again, Rob answered.

“I want my cat back.” Bill just said straight forward.

“I’ll give you your cat back, if I can date your daughter.” Rob replied.

“One more thing. I want you to steal the pillow I lay my head on, from my bedroom. Think you can take that?” Bill asked.

“Yup.” Rob said confidently.

“I’d like to see you try. Now, give me back my cat. My wife won’t let me back in the house, If I don’t.” Bill mumbled.

“Fine…” Rob grabs the cat, and gives it to Bill. “Next time, don’t let pizza guys into your home with no one watching.”

“Bite me.” Bill roared.

It was the middle of the night and over the time of the morning and now, Rob was building a dummy. Well, it was more of a half dummy. It was just an odd head, with a torso, and arms. But it looked convincing in the dark. Anyway, Rob had waited until midnight. Then he grabbed a ladder, and walked it over to Bill’s bedroom window. He climbed up, and he placed his dummy above him. He then tapped on the window, and Bill woke up. Bill noticed that there was a figure by his window. He figured it was Rob, so he grabbed his gun from the nightstand. He pointed it at Rob, and fired. He shot through the glass, and shot through the dummy’s head. It fell to the ground. Rob was near the front door, because he knew he would shoot him. And he knew that Bill would come out and check on the body. Bill walked out the door, leaving the front door open. Rob walked through, the front door. He went up the stairs and pretended to be Bill.

“That was quick.” Bill’s wife mumbled, who was still sleeping

Rob just grunted. He walked to the side of the bed, and grabbed the pillow. He looked through the window, and saw that Bill wasn’t there. He heard thumping of footsteps coming up stairs. Rob jumped out the window. And escaped in a bold way.

The next day, Bill came to the door again, but this time with his daughter. Rob answers the door.

“OK, you win. You can ask my daughter out.” Bill said in defeat.

“Really. OK then. So…how about dinner?” He said to Bill’s daughter.

“Um…yeah. I don’t mean to be mean, but you drugged my dad just to steal a piece of metal, you dress up as a pizza guy, and steal my cat, and you break into our house, and escape through a window, just for a pillow my dad drools on. Sorry, I’m not interested.” She explained.

Rob was a little shocked. But then said. “Oh well. Other fish in the sea, I’ll find someone else. Blah Blah Blah, Words Words Words. Have a good life.” The Rob closes the door.

In the end, Rob found a place of his own. He still does what he does. And he meets many women on a regular basis. And the funny thing is, he still hasn’t been caught yet.