Nothing

fading..what happens when I start to feel nothing,,,am I anything then..would I be souless..empty..forgotten. They have already forgotten about me, im a traveling amusment park. My life has been so crazy…I am so tired of sucking it up..do things I don’t want to do..being at everyones beck and call. I want to hide inside myself covered…sheltered…safe. No one understands me. Why am I so difficult..what is wrong with me? Sadness..guilt..confusion so consuming. I want to cry for days…weeks..years. get it all out before I become numb..a lost soul floating in limbo...unphased..uncaring…defines the term nothing. I would be nothing…Is something better than nothing? My thoughts are my own..thats something.