Mom...

Have you ever considered living without one or both of your parents.. It might SOUND cool...but definitely its not actually so cool be in the real situation... I lost my mom... Two years ago...

I haven't been the really nice kind of kid...yeah I have had my share of conflicts and fights with mamma... You known, what? I realised that we all used to take each other for granted... Never really thought how it would be without any one of us...I mean, come on!...who thinks about it?

so I never did either... Almost a year before she passed I had just come to my new college...new hostel... new freedom... and as I ws the oldest I ws the first kid to leave the house... ans as you know MOMs... she ws also very protective about me.. calling me up two times a day to make sure I am alright... I've had my food... gone to the college.. asking me where I am..

You know It kind of gets a lil irritating at times... I would continously tell her "mamma! I am a big girl now...come on...stop trying to watch over me" and she'd realise I was right...nd she'll all be like " yeah , yeah!! I know...u want freedom, but I am a mother... I cant help it..."

and I knew she ws right on her place and I on mine... she was the person who spoiled me... with her pampering nature...love..care... she never let me loose my innocence... And when she left... INNOCENCE.. was all that i ws left with...

I have tried to find many surrogates after she is gone... even when I know deep inside my heart I'll never find one who could stand in her position for even one tiny bit... I miss her... I miss her phone calls that I used to get irritated to... I miss her outspoken nature due to which earlier I used to feel embarresed about..wen she'd talk about my childhood and stuff... I miss her wen I fall sick...

everyday I have come back to a home where she'd be standing at the door...waiting for me... and I'd be all fussy about it.. that I am not a kid any more... I can take care of myself.. now when I am 20... I return home every six months and I miss her at the door... I miss the meticulously cleaned house... steaming hot served food... And her remark "haven't you been eating in college?? you look thin..."

I miss you... everyday..every hour...every phone call... I miss you, mamma...