Ten Tiny Ribbons

Monday

She didn’t understand what she had done wrong. All she had said was she hated herself. Apparently, that was a big deal.
Mom cried. Her and dad talked very quietly for a long time. Her teacher looked at her with sad eyes, and she had to go see the school guidance counselor, an old man who smelled of powder and smoke. At age nine, it’s hard enough to understand why you can’t wear your favourite dress to school every day, so all these changes and sad looks had her completely confused and overwhelmed. What had she done wrong?

“Trisha, why do you keep saying you hate yourself?” the old guidance counselor, Mr Harvey, asked her one morning. He had seen her only a handful of times, but each time, she had stated she disliked herself. The child shrugged.

“Because I’m ugly,” she said plainly. She poked her stomach, where her uniform white shirt was pulled a bit tight over some persistent baby fat. “My tummy is too big, and my hair,” she pulled a tightly curled lock, which sprang back into place instantly, “it’s not as shiny. Like Paula’s or Jenny’s.” She pulled the lock again, upsetting the blue bow-shaped clip on the side of her head.

Mr Harvey shook his head. To every adult, little Trisha Malone was a beautiful child. Plump cheeks, Shirley Temple hair, bright green eyes and a short stature made her downright adorable. But in this day and age, he thought to himself, thin, tall and exotic women, with small faces and dark hair, were the ideal beauty standard. A short, slightly chubby blonde girl would be looked at as ugly through the eyes of children. And he knew well exactly how cruel children could be.

He took off his glasses, rubbing a hand down his face as he tried to riddle out what to do. Slipping them back over his tired eyes, he looked over his desk at Trisha, who appeared small in the plain brown armchair. His eyes danced around his beige-pink coloured office, searching for an idea, a way to help her. He looked back at her, his eyes falling on the blue bow, such a sharp contrast to her pale curls. His mind began to spin, an idea growing. Reaching into his desk, he pulled out a spool of white ribbon. He held it up and looked at Trisha. “Do you know what this is?”

She looked at it curiously, cocking her head to one side, almost like a dog. “It looks like balloon string,” she answered in her soft, high voice. She reached for the ribbon to examine it further. Mr Harvey handed it to her.

“That’s exactly what it is. You’re very smart, Trisha.” He watched her turn it round and round, looking for the loose end. Finding it, she unraveled a few inches, feeling it between her fingers, playing with the curl left behind.

“It’s as curly as my hair!” The excitement of discovery made her voice strong. She pulled the ribbon, then her hair, then the ribbon again. “It bounces back the exact same way!”

Mr Harvey smiled, offering a small laugh. “Yes, that it does. Would you like to keep some of the ribbon?” Trisha nodded eagerly, her eyes lit up with joy as she looked at him with thanks. “Ok then, come around to the side of my desk.” She jumped off the chair and was by his side in a second, her whole body vibrating with the excitement of the curly ribbon. Grabbing a scissor off his desk, he spun himself to the side to face her better. “Can you hold out your hand for me, like this?” He put his hand in front of him, spreading it as wide as he could so none of the fingers touched. Trisha looked puzzled, but complied, extending her right arm and stretching her fingers until they shook. Holding the spool carefully, he wrapped a short length of ribbon around her little finger. Cutting it from the rest of the ribbon, he tied it around her finger. Trisha watched as he did this for her ring, middle and index fingers. He reached for her thumb and she pulled back.

“Not my thumb. I’ll have trouble holding my pencil.” Mr Harvey nodded and, instead, tied a large bit around her wrist. He straightened up and allowed her to survey his handy work. She smiled. “My hand looks so pretty! Can you do the other one?”
“Of course, dear.” He repeated the process on her left hand, a small smile playing at his lips. When he backed away, she held both hands in front of her face, looking at the ribbons with glee.

“Thank you so much, Mr Harvey!” He smiled down at her, and told her to sit back down. He had something else to tell her. “What is it?” she asked quietly, pulling a curl of the ribbon on her left wrist.

“I have a game for you. A new, secret game that no one has ever played before,” he said, a bit dramatically. She straightened up, excited by the prospect.

“What is it? What is it?” She bounced in the chair, begging him to tell her more.

“Those ribbons are magically glued to you right now. Every time you say something bad about yourself, like you’re ugly or you’re stupid, the magic wears off a little and you need to take a ribbon off, or else it will turn black and burn up in a cloud of smoke. If you can keep all ten ribbons on for ten days, the magic will absorb into you forever and you’ll be the most beautiful, talented, intelligent girl in the entire school – no, the entire world!” He threw his arms wide, his face excited. Trisha’s face, lit up with excitement, flattened.

“But… I am ugly. How do I not say that for ten days?”

“You need to be careful, Trisha. You just now said you’re ugly. Normally, you’d have to take a ribbon off, but you get one freebie. Try to think nice things about yourself. Tell yourself you’re a fast runner, or great at drawing dinosaurs. If you think nice things, there won’t be any room for the bad thoughts. And if you don’t think them, you won’t say them.”

Trisha studied her hands, looking doubtful. The bell sounded. She had to go back to class now. The two stood up, heading for the door. Mr Harvey opened it as Trisha stepped outside, her back to him. She spun suddenly, asking, “How will I know if the magic goes into my body after ten days?”

Mr Harvey smiled. “That’s easy. You’ll feel happier than you ever have in your whole life.” Trisha nodded, accepting this answer, and walked down the red and white tiled hall to her classroom.


Tuesday

Trisha looked at the floor, upset with herself. Mr  Harvey frowned at her bowed head. Six ribbons. Six ribbons had been taken off since just yesterday. He was worried.

“Trisha, why did you say six bad things about yourself?” She shrugged. She hadn’t said anything for nearly ten minutes. She came in, sat in the chair, and there she had stayed, still and silent. “Trisha, please talk to me.” She shook her head. Mr Harvy sighed. “Ok, I guess I can’t replace the ribbons then, and you’ll never get the magic.”

“That’s not fair!” she yelled, her head snapping up, her eyes angry.

“You need to tell me why you said the bad things, otherwise I can’t give you more ribbons. That’s one of the rules of this game. Do you want more ribbons?” She nodded. “Then you need to tell me what happened.”

“Well, fine! The first thing I said was I’m a bad drawer because Timmy was making fun of my t-rex, he said the arms were too long. But his giraffe had a short neck and when I told him his giraffe had a stupid neck, Mrs Amy put me in time out for saying a bad word. I didn’t say anything bad about myself but good kids don’t get time outs. So I had to take off two ribbons before it was even lunch time! Then we did gym and I tried to kick the ball really hard but I missed so I said I was dumb because when I missed I fell down. So that was ribbon number three. Then we had free time and Andy and Jessica were playing house and I went to play with them and they said I could be the dog because I was shortest, so I called myself short, I’m not sure that was actually bad or not but I felt bad saying it so I took off another ribbon. That’s five-”

“That’s only four,” Mr Harvey corrected.

“See? I can’t even count right! I’m so stupid!” She looked down and pulled off another ribbon. “Now I have seven gone. I’m bad at this game, Mr Harvey. I’m a bad game player.” Another ribbon gone. Only the two around her wrists remained. Mr Harvey sighed, upset at how much this little girl put herself down. He wanted to hug her, reminded of his own daughter, now an adult, but held back.

“Ok, Trisha. We’re going to start the game again. Come here.” She came over to the side of his desk and extended her hands, looking sad. He tied eight small ribbons around each of her fingers, leaving her thumbs open. She dropped her hands, looking at the floor. “Hey.” Trisha looked up. “Don’t be so sad. Just keep thinking nice things. I know it’s hard, but you’ll get the hang of it before you know it.” The bell sounded. Away she went.

Mr Harvey sighed, looking at the calendar on the wall. Taking a black marker, he marked on the Tuesday square:

Day 2, -8.


Wednesday

“Look, Trisha, only three ribbons missing! That’s so much better!”

Trisha nodded, looking happy. “I did exactly what you said! I messed up a few times, but I just kept thinking nice thoughts. And it worked! See?” She held her hands out all the way, waving them excitedly, and she showed off how many ribbons there were. “I think the magic is going into my body already, I feel happier.”

Mr Harvey smiled. “I’m so glad!”

Wednesday: Day 3, -3


Thursday

“They’re all gone? How did that happen?”

“I forgot to think nice things! And I messed up all day! My painting was bad and I couldn’t catch the ball and I tore my skirt so I looked ugly all day, and I was just bad!” Trisha wailed, tears in her eyes, her cheeks stained, as Mr Harvey replaced all ten ribbons. He pet her head lightly, pulling on a curl.

“Just keep trying.”

Thursday: Day 4, -10


Friday

“Now Trisha, you need to be extra careful. I won’t see you for two whole days after today, so these ribbons need to last three days.” She had come in missing six, looking sad. He replaced them as soon as she walked in the door, a routine developing.

“I know, Mr Harvey. But I think I can do it. I want that magic. I feel it a little bit sometimes, and it’s nice. I feel warm and happy and my face hurts from smiling. I want that to happen all the time.” Her small face was determined, her jaw set tight.

“I know you can do it.”

Friday: Day 5, -6


Monday came, and Trisha nearly ran into his office, waving her arms around.

“Look Mr Harvey, look! Only two gone! That’s less than one bad thing every day!”

Mr Harvey beamed at her. “That’s excellent, Trisha! What did you do all weekend that you said so few bad things?”

Trisha shrugged. “I dunno. I just kept thinking happy things. I was able to run around more than my dog, and I beat my brother at Uno, and I helped mommy clean the kitchen, and daddy and I worked on my bike, it has a bad chain, and-”

“I get it, Trisha,” Mr Harvey said, smiling at her. She smiled back.

“Am I doing good, Mr Harvey? Am I winning the game?”

He smiled at her, bright eyes looking expectant. He nodded. “Yes, Trisha. You’re winning.”

Monday: Day 8,-2


Tuesday

Mr Harvey ran into his office, running late. His car had broken down on the drive to work. Trisha was in his office, looking down. Her hands were under her bottom. His shoulders fell.

“Oh no, Trisha. Did you have a bad day?” He set his bag on the floor, removing his hat and coat. She was still looking down, unspeaking. “Trisha? Did you lose all the ribbons again?” She looked up at him. He noticed her trying, and failing, to fight off a smile. The corners of his own mouth begin to quirk up. “Trisha? How many ribbons do you have on?”

She jumped up, waving her hands at him. All ten ribbons were there. Mr Harvey felt his face light up, proud of the young girl.

“Trisha! All ten! Fantastic! You must be feeling the magic already!” She nodded, bounding on the balls of her feet, her hair jiggling, pride and happiness making her entire body glow. He smiled brightly, offering her a sweet for doing so well.

Tuesday: Day 9,-0

It was working.


Friday

“I MESSED UP!” Her voice was shrill with sadness.

“It’s ok Trisha, it’s ok. You can’t expect to get it all right away. You only lost one ribbon since Monday. That’s one ribbon in 4 days. That’s still really good.” He watched her cry, rubbing her eyes harshly. Handing her a tissue, he tried to soothe her. “You’re still winning, Trisha. You can still get the magic.”

Friday: Day 12, -1


Friday

“You haven’t lost a ribbon all week, Trisha.”

“I know,” she said, the pride obvious. “That’s seven whole days. If I can make it to Monday without losing one, I get the magic!”
“Uh uh, not Monday. Count it again.”

She held up her fingers, giving each of them a day of the week. “Oh, Tuesday.”

Friday: Day 19, none (+7)


Sunday

Mr Harvey had spent the entire day down town, looking for the perfect gift for Trisha. He knew she could do it; she was only a few days away. She wanted that magic too much to mess up now. But he had to be careful. With all the scandals and arrests lately, he couldn’t give her anything extravagant, lest he be looked upon as a predator. But shop after shop, he found nothing.
It was nearly 6 pm. His wife would want him home soon for dinner. One last shop, he told himself. Pushing open the glass door, a little bell jingled as he crossed the entryway into a small antique shop.

“Anything I can help you with today?”

He turned. A bright redhead, looking only in her 20’s or so, stood behind the desk, offering a friendly smile. “Yes, actually, you can.” He explained the situation, telling her all about Trisha and the magic, as well as mentioning his fear of this gift being looked at the wrong way.

“I understand. Hm, that’s hard, a lot of the items here are very ornate, very pricey.” Mr Harvey shook his head. “Although… let me see if we still have it. I think it’d be perfect.” She disappeared into a back room. Mr Harvey turned, surveying the shelves. He flicked his fingers against an old silver jingle bell, making it ring. “Aha!” He turned back just in time to watch the woman return to the main shop, holding a small, rectangular wooden box. “Check it out, see if you like it. It’s not too pricey either, I can give it to you for fifteen even.”

Mr Harvey opened it, surveying the contents. He felt himself smile, his eyes going wide This is it. He nodded, staring into the box. “It’s perfect.”


Tuesday
“I DID IT I DID IT I DID IT!” Trisha jumped up and down, her arms held tight to her side, her hands balled into small fists. “I did it! All ten ribbons for ten whole days! I got the magic!” She continued to jump, her hair flying everywhere, pink skirt flattening over white tights with every upwards motion, parachuting ever descent.

“Yes, you did! I’m so proud of you, Trisha! Do you feel the magic?”

The girl nodded vigorously, her face pink from excitement. “I do! I felt it as soon as I woke up! It’s all warm inside of me, as if I ate the sun!”

Mr Harvey laughed, his smile wide. “There’s one last thing you need to do to keep the magic forever.”

Trisha stopped jumping, suddenly looking scared. “What’s that?”

Mr Harvey opened a small drawer of his desk and pulled out the wooden box. He had called her mother that morning, discussing his plan with her. She had given her full consent, thanking him for working so well with Trisha. “I’ve never seen her so happy,” Mrs Malone had gushed.

Coming around his desk, he knelt in front of the brown chair where Trisha sat, looking nervous. He handed her the box. She looked at the box, then back to him, unsure. “Open it.”

She lifted the lid, removing the white satin hair clip, shaped like a bow, from inside. “Oh, it’s so pretty!” She pulled her trademark blue bow from her hair, replacing it with the white one.

“Every time you think a bad thing, or feel a little upset, I want you to put that bow into your hair. It’ll give you an extra burst of magic so that the bad thoughts and feelings will go away.”

Trisha smiled, touching the bow. “Thank you, Mr Harvey!” Before he could stop her, she threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tight. He smiled, wrapping his arms around her small body, returning the embrace.

“You’re welcome, Trisha. You have that magic forever now.” He let her go, and offered her a friendly smile. “Make sure you use it.”

“I will!” She jumped out of the chair and ran off down the hall, yelling for her friends to come see her new hair ribbon.

Tuesday, Day 23.

Magic.