The Perfect Dinner

I planned the perfect dinner,
I knew it would be a winner,
You ask if you could bring your pets,
I thought you still had cats.

I fixed your favorite meal,
French fries with flambéed eel,
And for desert I baked,
A vanilla chocolate layer cake.

When you arrived at seven,
I thought I was in heaven,
Until I saw the huge spider,
And the poisonous pit viper.

My friends said you had changed,
But I didn't think you were deranged,
I said, "Your pets are weird."
You said, "They're not to be feared."

I said, "I think you,re wrong,
In my house they don't belong,
So please take them out of here,
Or make them disappear."

You said, "If they can't stay,
I'll go far away,
Perhaps to London or Beijing."
I said, "Like it's a bad thing."