The Wayfarers of Ocular Road Part four

The Wayfarers of Ocular Road

By Mantis

Part 4

Each in their own agony, James and Alicia trudged along the long corridor. Outside against the cold October wind, the balcony walkway of the Super 8 stretched for an eternity.

"Room 24 is wayyy down the far end," the clerk had said when she'd finally managed to snap her attention away from the string of texts on her smart phone. Her verdict was final. She'd sentenced them to the death march now at hand.

"Boy oh boy, she wasn't kidding when she said far end," griped James, faltering under the strain of his load.

"I know... right?" Despite her condition, Alicia seemed to be getting along better than him; and James wrestled with himself, mildly chagrined by that odd incongruity.

Alicia's agony was readily aparent in the way she limped, hunched over again, her head and shoulders leaning forward as if trail blazers for the rest of her beaten body. It could also be seen in the frequent grimaces appearing on her face as she struggled to propel herself forward in the most ergonomic, painless way.

Although, James saw only a heroine; an intrepid, strong woman, distressed by her condition, yet unbeaten by it. Her aura, her presence of character bespoke a resilience in her bearing, inviting one to surmise that she viewed her condition as but a mere setback, one to be pushed aside and forgotten after a spot of rest and relaxation.

It was in her grouchy grumbles which took the place of any sighs or moans, in her defiance to not let her condition slow her down, to make her stop and rest momentarily; it was in her return to an air of amusement which nearly always followed the grumbles or the chance wince brought on by a painful step or the irritation of her garments rubbing against a tender spot on her flesh. And it was most easily seen in the flash of an ornery grin shot his way when she'd catch his eye.

James' agony, on the other hand, stemmed from haulage. Not only were the CVS bags cumbersome, stuffed with first aid and other provisions, Alicia's duffle bag was a monstrosity. It had no shoulder strap attached to the metal rings where it was supposed to be, nor did it have handles anymore, long since torn away. God only knew how old it was and how many hands it had passed through in its existance. And so James was compelled to foist the whole thing up under his arm, holding it like a spoiled stinker of a child needing to be hastily carried away from the playground. Unlike Alicia, James was near to the point of unabashed whimpering under this infernal burden.

Finally at the end of their laborious trek, James painstakingly fumbled with the key-card until, mercifully, a little green light blinked and a satisfying click sounded. Suite 24 was one thing - and one thing alone. It was typical.

He lumbered into the room, dropping Alicia's duffle bag at the foot of the far bed.

Alicia, never one to contain her excitement, gave her reviled body a big "Fuck you", and suddenly dashed past him, her pain momentarily forgotten, and leaped onto the bed with a sprighness that amazed him. She landed on her back and bounced merrily up and down on its springy surface in ever diminishing lengths.

Then she bellowed like a knucklehead from that dire mistake. "Oh God," she moaned, "I think I just broke something." She gingerly rubbed her left shoulder.

Silly girl, thought James.

"Silly girl," sighed her Orbs.

"Don't worry," James said to her, "You can't break that bedframe... it's built like a tank."

"Smartass!"

He set the CVS bags down on his bed, then proceeded to lay out the contents there.

Bactine. Check

Tincture of iodine.... just for good measure. Check.

Band aides. Check

Gauze. Check.

Advil. Check

Wash cloths. Check

Stainless steel bowl... one gallon variety. Check.

Tooth brush & paste. Check.

Deoderant. Check.

More deoderant. Check Roger!

Carton of Camel Turkish Gold. Check.  Gotta get her to start Vapeing!

Mark Ten electronic cigarette kit. Check.  Gotta start somewhere.

And last but not least:

Humongous Hershey Bar - dark chocolate for him; 2 humongous Hershey Bars - milk chocolate for her. Check and check.

Inventory complete.

"Sheesh, Jamesy... got enough crap there?"

"Still got to call Farrari's pizza... otherwise, we're good."

"Humanity. Check," added her Orbs.

James smiled. "Mustn't let The Existential's generous reciprocity go to waste."

James and Alicia took a few minutes to settle in, their stream of banter forever ebbing and flowing like the ocean tide.

James arranged all the provisions on the cheap desk under the window, then checked the upper desk drawer for Gideon's Bible - just for fun. It was there, cementing his faith in that hostelry tradition.

He brought the tooth brush, paste and deoderant over and handed them to her. "Leave some hot water for me... okay?"

She looked at the items in her hand. "You trying to tell me something, Jamesy?"

He smiled at her. He couldn't help letting his eyes roam over her body for a brief moment. Relieved of her outer gear, James was able to see her figure to the full extent. Standing there in her black stretch pants and t-shirt (it said 'PIXIES' and showed a monkey set in a da vincian-style anatomy sketch) it was revealed to him that she was no skin-and-bones, half starved waife, but rather a robust woman possessed of lovely, ample curves set upon an otherwise athletic body.

In juxtaposition to that beautiful figure, were the cuts and bruises that pocked her arms, neck and face, and James frowned, suddenly overcome with a sense of pity when he saw the multitude of them.

"We have to talk, Sentients. Standby."

"Certainly, James."

"Oh, this is going to be pure bliss!" cooed Alicia as she gathered her bath items, painfully hoisted up her duffle bag and then disappeared into the bathroom.

James went to the desk, ignoring everything except for the chocolate bar which he grabbed. He plopped into the chair beside the desk, unwrapped the sweet treat, and began devouring it while listening to the sound of the running shower. He waited for her Orbs to enter on stage.

"You're going to ruin your appetite with all that chocolate."

"Nothing can ruin my appetite when one of Mick Farrari's large plains is on the menu."

"So you wanted to discuss... what?"

"You told me about her cuts and bruises earlier, but you didn't go into detail. What exactly happened? "

"Why don't you ask her?"

"Because I'm asking you."

"Commanding us, rather."

"Hey, what's with the attitude?"

"We are Orbs of stature now, James. Surely you can't expect us to be at your beck and call for every measly little thing about her anymore."

"Measly little thing? Are you guys off your fucking rocker?" James was surprised by their attitude. "Excuse my French," he added, nonetheless. He was, after all, an Adept now.

"Ahem... Perhaps not, but this constant revealing of her life to you is getting old."

"What else in God's name do you have better to do? This is what you live for."

"You may not be aware, James, but the position of Liaison carries with it the burden of utmost dedication. How shall we ever find the time?"

"I told you numbskulls not to let the power go to your heads. Tisk, tisk... look how jaded you've become. It saddens me."

"Listen, James, all jocularity aside, we're not going to tell you about it. If you want to know, ask her."

"Okay... if not merely drunk on power, then why, dearest Orbs, why not?"

"As you well know, there will come a time when your gift will grow silent. We see it as beneficial to you to begin more of a back and forth with her... beyond the endless banter you're both so fond of."

"Is that so?"

"Look how well you did drawing her out regarding her Black Fortress. You operated with such aplomb. Continue in that vein."

"What are you talking about... all of it was derived from what you revealed to me. I could never have done that without you."

"You rely too much on us, James," they snapped, side stepping his point. James was surprised by their tenor. "Take life by the horns and go get your girl!"

"Oh, this is rich. 'Go get your girl...'," he repeated sarcastically. "What, is this some kind of romance novel to you guys?" He didn't like were this was going.

"And he calls us stubborn," they empathised together before returning their focus to him. "Putting the blinders on, James, is such a futile endeavor. Since when have you become one to stick your head in the sand?"

"Listen, you two, I'm tired of this bullshit... now tell me what happened!" Maybe ire would kick them into gear? He hadn't really tried that tact on them yet.

"The language, James, the lan..."

"Fuck the language. Tell me!"

"No."

Note to self: ire is useless with humpty and dumpty.

"We heard that... Sir!" They feigned indignant, chuckling just the same. Then they turned serious. "Okay, James, if you must know, we'll tell you. We feel certain that what our darling needs is to tell her story. It's been bottled up inside her for over a week... she's had no outlet, nobody for which to listen.

She needs to get it all out, to re-live it once more, and in so doing, purge the demons from her mind. In this way we feel she will be better suited to put closure to the whole affair and move on with her life, instead of letting that sad episode fester inside her mind and pollute her soul. Do you understand?"

James remained silent, lost in thought.

They left him then. He soon tried to beckon them back, but they did not return.

The moments ticked by.

Who would do such a thing to her? What could she have possibly done to deserve that? Nothing! Nobody deserve a thrashing like that. He imagined that she could be rather heartless and insensitive out there in the world - and could probably drive anybody to near insanity. But a beating like that? No, that just was not right. Somebody sick or furiously angry did that. Or somebody very drunk.

His mind wandered further while he sat there, the sounds of busy Greensburg knocking against the windows behind his head, and the soft drone of Alicia's shower urging him to a near meditative state.

He recalled their breakfast at Denny's. He remembered her Orbs prescient question.

Precious?

How adroitly he'd pushed away his doubts regarding the extent of his love for Anna. With the doubts cast aside, getting on with her for those three years of marriage was good - very good indeed! He'd be a pig-faced liar if he were to say that they hadn't settled down into a pleasant and fulfilling coexistance. Their togetherness had simply begun to feel right.

Yet their question, that simple, two syllable question... What a dastardly thing her Orbs had done to remind him of the doubts.

Were he and Anna born for each other? Was it that kind of deep love that they shared? 

James sighed, the whole thing as yet unresolved in his mind. His thoughts then shifted to his gift.

When he'd endeavored to help Alicia face herself and her ungainly obsession with black attire, he'd used his gift to its full potential, digging into the facts her Orbs had imprinted in his mind and foisting the truth at her. He might have thought that he'd never used his gift more effectively, but not now, not after all that he'd learned from The Enlightenment.

Bits and pieces of his talks with Dunst drifted into his mind. Alicia's Orbs had mentioned his cunning mind. And they were right.

He'd used every bit of insight gleened from his gift on Dunst. He'd used it expertly to form his arguments. His reasoning and his forcing of the truth upon Dunst must have made the man reel. He'd become passionate, knowing full well that every word he spoke, every allegation he'd made was backed by the power of truth. And as time went by, he'd become stronger in his reasoning, harsher in his accusations, and wilier in his manipulation of Dunst.

Surely he'd used his gift then more determinately, more cunningly than he had with Alicia to break through her front.

He'd leveled up, her Orbs had told him. He'd grown so accustomed to his gift, accustomed to using its power, had become so attuned to what he was capable of with it, that employing it with Alicia this morning had practically seemed like second nature to him, something as simple as breathing or blinking. Hell, he could have done it with his eyes closed.

He chuckled at the irony of that thought.

He'd leveled up. Sure, how wonderful it all was. What a juggernaught he was now in his gift. And yet, here he sat, in all his leveled up glory, his understanding of its tenents backed now by the cosmic knowledge revealed in The Enlightenment; and what did he have to show for it? Sentient Orbs that had just abandon him! That's what he had.

And where was this Existential? Why would he not come to him, explain things to him himself? Why had he chosen to make those ornery Orbs liaisons NOW? What was so important about meeting Alicia? What could she possibly mean to him that the revelations of The Enlightenment and the introduction to the existance of The Existential had suddenly become so relevant? What was it all for? Where was it all going?

Questions. Questions. Questions - even after his enlightenment. God damn it, he wanted some fucking answers! Excuse his French...



***



Answers. That's all he wanted. But they would have to wait.

He looked up upon a sudden movement into the room.

James Krouplitz gasped!

"Oh, my God..." His heart skipped a beat. "Oh, Jesus Christ... Alicia, what happened to you?"

Alicia stood there in the bathroom doorway. She had the bath towel wrapped around her body, cinched in place near her armpits.

It was what he saw at her upper chest, just below her left shoulder that had made him gasp. There was the most ghastly puncture wound there, her flesh torn open, jagged at the perimeter, two inches in length from north to south and nearly an inch wide east to west.

Her whole left shoulder was enlarged, having swelled up from the trauma of that wound - something that her snorkel and clothes had hidden well up to that point. The whole area around the wound, her shoulder, nearly her whole pectoral muscle was purplish black with sickening shades of yellow and green around the edges, seemingly thrown in just for good measure to nauseate him.

"Don't look at me like that, James, you're scaring me... and I don't scare easy."

James made to speak, but choked instead. The level of shock was intense. He put his closed fist to his mouth, stifling the need to rage. If only he could get his hands on the monster that did this, he'd make him paid dearly.

"Talk to her, James. Tend to her," said her Orbs with a solemnness that he'd not heard from them before. This was serious business.

Their words broke his shock and he swung into action.

He came to her and led her towards the bed. "Sit down here," he motioned to the edge of the bed.

"Okay, doc."

"Alright... hold on. Let me get all this shit together." First he grabbed the stainless steel bowl, headed into the bathroom and filled it with hot soapy water. He placed it on the floor beside her feet. The he went to gather the first aid gear and layed them out on the bed beside her.

"Ouch," she bellowed when, while getting in close to inspect her chest wound, he bumped against her left thigh.

"What... where?"

"Upper left thigh. Got another doosy there."

Without hesitation, he hiked up her bath towel, completely unconcerned with the decorum of modesty at this point, and revealed a sickening gash on her thigh just below her hip.

"Oh, God damn it! Holy shit, no wonder you've been limping like that." He brushed the sweat from his forehead, his heart racing, then he rubbed his eyes, trying to focus his mind on what to do next.

"Why didn't you go to the God damned hospital, you asshole?"

"Hey, hey... I'm your patient here. How about a little bedside manner, huh?"

"I don't get you. These fucking wounds could be infected. Don't you have any idea how fucking serious this is? Holy hell, Alicia, you could have fucking bled out."

"Nah... I wrapped them up pretty good right afterwards."

"Why didn't you go to the hospital? Most people wouldn't have been able to get to a hospital fast enough. Most people would have demanded to go... would have gone kicking and screaming if you'd try to stop them."

"I'm not most people."

"Yeah... well guess who's getting stitches tomorrow?"

"I knew you were gonna be a pain in the ass about this."

"Arrgggghhh. Shut up and let me look at this. Look, you just took a shower... and look... look how much dried blood and dirt there still is. These wounds are filthy!"

"It's a little tender there, James. Gashes and punctures don't mix well with rough wash cloths."

"Shut up!" he yelled, completely flustered and faced with a situation out of his league. "I'm so fucking mad at you right now. God damn it, would you please tell me why you didn't go to the hospital?"

"Should I shut up... or tell you? Which do you prefer?" She let out a soft chuckle and eyed him intently. In fact, she couldn't take her eyes off of him. If he would have looked up at her face just then, he would have seen the glowing expression of enchantment there, the look of wonderment and admiration adorning her face. He would have seen just then how capable his consummate humanity was at casting its spell of charm - even on the most ornery sorts such as she.

"I don't know... huh? Where's the tincture... what? How the hell... Prefer? I gotta use the antiseptic... right? No wait... water first. Where..."

"James?"

"Yeah, hot water... soap, then antiseptic. Isn't that how mom did it? God damn it... so fucking deep. What do you mean 'prefer'? Wait... what?"

"James?"

Why wouldn't she shut up? He needed quiet, needed to think. He was too busy. Couldn't she see that?

"James?"

He stopped. Stopped everything. She took him by the chin and lifted his head. He looked into her face, felt the tears welling in his eyes, his lungs momentarily forgetting how to breathe. He bit down on his index finger, continuing to look up at her. They stared at each other for a moment, and he touched the slowly scabbing cut on her lip with his finger. Alicia palmed his cheek, her thumb caressing gently upon his cheek bone.

James broke down then.



***



Moments later, he was working on her shoulder. The savage gash on her thigh had been cleaned as best he could. He'd patted it dry, even smelled it - bits and pieces of information he'd gleened over the years concerning the bad smell of infections entering his mind - and thankfully there was no rotting smell. He looked for any bleeding, and when he was convinced that there was none, spritzed it with the Bactine. Then he'd wrapped her thigh in considerably more wraps than were needed.

"Stitches for you tomorrow, woman... and don't give me any lip about it. Westmoreland hospital is really close."

She only sighed.

He was going to use the tincture of iodine on it, as well as on her punture wound, but she instructed him not to. She'd had enough pain for the last week, she didn't need mind-numbing stinging. She explained that tincture was only used on small scrapes and scratches. But by God, thought James, considering the plethora of them on her body, apart from the two major wounds, he'd be putting the tincture to good use just the same.

"I want to know everything," he said.

"It's no big deal, James... let's just forget about it."

"Tell me everything."

"C'mon, Jamesy, we can..."

"Ugh ugh ugh ugh... shhhhhh," he put his finger to her lips. He looked deeply into her eyes. "I want to know. You need to tell me. Everything."

His humanity was a powerful thing. Plus James sensed she was self aware enough to come to the same conclusion that her Orbs had come to. She needed to talk about this. "Okay, James."

"This is good, James," said her Orb's. "She so desperately needs this for her catharsis. How good of you to listen."

Alicia looked off to the side in deep thought. She took a deep breath, sighed, then began to tell her story.



***



"I'd left New York City early last week. I'd been hanging around there for awhile, hangin' with a group of young runaways, but I got bored with them.

NYC is a pretty cool place, but I got the wanderlust... you know?"

"So it seems."

"So I hitched down to Philly... just to check that place out before I started west to Colorado. Made it there okay, hung around, got drunk mostly... then left, hitchin' my way west.

Got a ride from a local Bedford boy, which is where he dropped me off. Wonderful Bedford, Pa... a real paradise... such friendly folk and all," she scoffed, bristling at the mention of the town.

"I was getting desperate for a ride... I was having no luck with that. That night, I went into a local shit hole, and plopped myself down at the bar. And there I waited. What a bunch of backwards assed losers, let me tell you. I'd taken my snorkel off, was looking damned fine, if you ask me, yet none of them assholes would have anything to do with me.

Then Dan came in. He took a seat right beside me, ordered his beer, and proceeded to ignore me."

"Dan?"

"Dan The Wicked... that's the way I like to refer to him."

"So Dan's responsible for this?" He raised his chin toward her puncture wound.

"Oh yeah, Dan, sweet Danny, good ol' Danny boy." She suddenly flinched. "Ouch! Hey, be careful, chumley, that's tender there."

"Sorry. Go on."

"So I'm sitting there with this neanderthal next to me. Hasn't got a thing to say, and I'm just dying of thirst... not to mention starving to death... not to mention needing a ride west. What's a gal gotta do to get a drink around here, anyway?

He was dressed in his camouflage hunting suit... like just about everybody else in that stink hole. Camouflage pants, red flannel shirt, glaringly bright orange cap - I guess so those idiots don't shoot each other out in the bush... even wore camouflage boots. He smelled like diesel fuel and Taco Bell, with a goodly dash of B.O. You can just imagine how I swooned.

When I finally got him to talk to me, all he seemed interested in was hunting, motors and classic rock bands. Typical Pennsylvania hayseed. God... how they love their hunting around here. There's got to be a million of them just like him wandering these hills.

I decided it was time to get down to business, so I start hustling him, using my God given charms, you know..."

"You needed a little practice... right?"

"Let's not go there, chumley."

"Right. Go on."

"Well, for how ignorant and uninterested in me he was at the beginning, he was a complete push over when I started hustling him. Before long, we'd set a price, and were heading out to his pickup truck.

He'd asked me if it was okay to take me to his hunting shack about two miles away. I'd seen the bowie knife he wore in a holster on his belt, and I had to think twice before I rushed into going off with him out into the woods. But I figured all these hunter jerks around here kept their knives close at hand, and, at the time, it didn't seem like it was out of place. 

That was my first mistake.

I agreed to go with him to his shack and have a quick roll with him. He was a tall husky sort, mostly flab, a real bear, and his red beard was scraggly... which I hate. He seemed like just a lumpy, harmless country doof. I wasn't looking forward to the tumble with him, but damn, I was hungry, James. I'd been at least a whole day without food, and I had to do something fast about it. And I figured he'd be a real quick shooter... if you know what I mean. I got a way with turning guys into quick shooters."

"I'll bet."

"So we drove outta there and he took me out into the hills. Before long, we were on a dirt trail with deep tire trenches. The trail made its way down along a ravine by a stream. It was pitch black outside by then... the only reason I knew the stream was there was by the sound of it. All I could see of the woods was the narrow cone out in front of the headlights.

When we got to his hunting shack, I saw a tall pole out front which had a lamp on top. It dimly illuminated the surrounding area, and I could see what a dump the place was.

I was beginning to feel a little apprehensive by that time... but, what the hell, I'd gone that far... might as well see it through, get my cash and then see to some hot chow.

When we were inside, he just stood there like a big, dumb oaf. I teased him and cajoled him... might have even belittled him some.

That was my second mistake.

So, before long, I was sitting on the edge of the bed, and he was standing in front of me. He said nothing... just looked down at me with a vague, far off smile. He seemed confused and a little agitated, child-like... or like a retard.

So I unzipped him, figuring a hand job would be all that was needed - probably the quickest one I'd ever have to give. He didn't seem like the kind of guy about to last real long. He'd get his rocks off fast and I'd be outta there and back in town before prime time, a pocket full of cash and a hot meal in store."

Alicia paused then, looked off beyond his shoulder and took a deep breath. James saw a look of pain and regret suddenly appear on her ravaged face, her black raven hair still wet and pulled back behind her ears. Such a beautiful face it was.

"And then, out of nowhere, he hit me. He hit me so hard, James... right across the face. I remember thinking, as I fell back on the bed, stunned and shocked, that it really was true... you actually do see stars when you're hit that hard. What a silly thing to think at such a time, huh?" She didn't expect an answer.

"When my vision came back, I looked at him, pleaded with him and put my hands up... but I knew right then that it would do no good.

He jumped on top of me, straddled me, his big, fat body crushing me... and then he proceeded to beat the living shit out of me. I struggled under his blows as best I could, but that fucking bear was strong, James... so fucking strong.

I was gripped by a fear I'd never known before, the kind of fear that makes you unable to breathe... the kind of fear that makes your heart pound so hard that it actually hurts.

Strike after strike, he layed into my body, consumed with a rage that made his eyes look like red hot coals and caused him to froth at the mouth. He was no longer a man flailing crazily on top of me... he was a beast. THE Beast!

I can remember the chills which shot down my spine that moment when I felt a strange certainty dawn on me that I was in the presence of the Devil himself... that he'd come up from hell, possessed this back-woods hick, and was going to finally punish me the way that I deserved.

And then, something broke inside me... not physically, mind you... at least not yet, but inside my mind. I suddenly understood, with a terror that curdled my soul, James, that I was about to die. This was the end. At the hand's of the Devil's shill, I was about to make my entry into hell. I was about to become a statistic - another sad news blurb: Prostitute Found Mutilated.

But despite the terror, I can remember steeling myself, preparing myself for the inevitable... instead of collapsing in despair." Alicia paused a moment, looked away and stared at nothing in particular. "Funny," was all she said in a far away voice. Then she returned her gaze to James.

"Then he pulled out his bowie knife. The vision of him on top of me, that long, sharp bowie knife trembling in his hand, was to me like looking at the very Gates of Hell.

With one hand choking my throat, so hard that I thought my eyeballs were going to pop out, he reached back with his knife hand and slit my thigh open. He did it so calmly, as if he were just testing its sharpness. I would have screamed the most wretched scream ever if his hand wasn't choking my throat closed. But I can tell you, James... the scream inside my chest was deafening.

Dear God... the way he then began to flick that knife over my body... more for the sake of causing pain than to kill. 'How unfair you're playing', I thought in my crazed mind, 'why won't you just kill me and get it over with?'.

As if reading my mind," she gave James a funny look just then before continuing. "He plunged the knife into my chest.

Do you know what it's like to have a giant bowie knife sunk deep into your chest, James?"

"Please, Alicia... please..."

"It is like a firm handshake with Death. It brings forth an immaculate understanding of just how fragile you really are. It really is amazing how cold hard steel can produce such white hot pain. But beyond that, the feeling of that blade digging into your tendons, the way it makes your mind intimately aware of what 'Merciless' truly means, is actually worse than the pain."

Her Orbs suddenly spoke up inside his mind. "Just so you're aware, James, she hasn't uttered one lie about this sad affair so far, and we expect she won't. It's actually the first time in years she's spoke at such length about anything without lying... just so you're aware."

James only nodded at them in his mind. He was having trouble breathing just then, let alone thinking.

"Then a strange thing happened. In that most damning, terrifying moment of my life, my blood spilling out of me, I became resigned to the fact of my imminent death. A calmness washed over me, James... as strange as that sounds, and I became unfeeling. The pain simply shut off.

I stopped hating him at that moment... I may have even smiled at him, I don't know. But then I did the strangest thing. I hooked my right arm around the back of his neck for leverage and pulled myself up toward him. With his hand still on the hilt of the knife, its brutal bite digging into me, trying its damnest to reconnect my mind with pain, we looked into one another's eyes, and then..." She paused.

"Wait 'till you hear this," said her Orbs.

...and then I kissed him."

James went frozen for a moment, his heart feeling dead, like nothing more than a cold slab of beef. But almost immediately, he was practically crushed under the hammer of sudden understanding. Dancing around its edges, a whisp of a notion fluttered in the back of his mind, carrying a simultaneous second understanding on its little wings: He didn't need them... he didn't need her Orbs to reveal everything about her. With his insight alone, his personal affinity with her - not his gifted affinity with her, he realized he was able to know her mind, to read her thoughts with an intimacy that shook him.

"Oh my dear God, Alicia... you were thanking him!"

She only looked down, her breathing heavy and sorrowful. When she looked up at him again, there was a pleading in her eyes, and if imploring him to understand, to empathize with her.

"You were thanking him," James continued, "thanking him for taking you out of your misery. You were thanking him for ending your wretched existence. You've sunk to such lows of self loathing, are so ashamed of who you've become, that you actually felt gratitude to that beast who was about to destroy you."

"Yes, James, you're right. There you go reading my mind again... I'm starting to get used to it."

"See, James," interjected her Orbs, "No need to rely on us for everything that needs knowing about her." James was too focused on Alicia to give weight to their words - what he'd figured out for himself just moments before.

"I was thanking him for doing what I'd been thinking about doing for months by then... but hadn't been able to do myself. I'm just not strong enough." Her tears began streaming down her face, but she held his gaze.

"No, Alicia, you're wrong. You're so wrong! You couldn't end your own life because you are not coward enough to do so."

She thought long about that. "Maybe," she finally allowed.

They dwelled in each other's gaze for a long moment, studying the lines on each other's face, both carried away upon the currents of emotion brought about by this accounting of her ordeal.

"I kissed him, James. I kissed him without hunger, without passion, only with thanks in my heart.

Apparently, it felt like passion to him, as I soon felt his erection against my other thigh. We continued to kiss, him rubbing himself against me, slobbering on me, but I was slipping into the dark shadows of death... at least that's how I felt at that moment. The submission to it was the most calming sensation I've ever had.

My eyes fluttered up into their socket as I awaited the inevitable. With his growing urges, he pulled the knife out of my chest and dropped it on the bed beside us. I didn't even feel the pain. We continued to kiss, my gratitude for his service trembling on my lips.

But then I heard a voice." The barest hint of a smile suddenly formed at the corners of her mouth. "It's a funny thing, but it was actually two voices. They spoke inside my mind as one, as in two part harmony. Two faint voices suddenly urging me, pleading with me... instructing me.

I fought them, willed them to go away, to leave me be and let me go on my terrible journey beyond. I almost suceeded but for a moment, although, soon I simply couldn't ignore them. I remember suddenly feeling a sense of great love for me in the harmony of their voices.

And so I listened to them. My sense of gratefulness and gratitude to Dan The Wicked suddenly became remote in my mind, began drifting away from my thoughts; and I remember picturing it as a pile of rotten floatsom being swept away upon the currents of that beautiful harmony inside my mind.

I did as they instructed.

I grabbed the bowie knife at my side... and in a sudden return to the reality at hand, I plunged it into his back, just like the voices told me to do. I plunged it so hard, James, with such force that I felt its tip reverberate against my own chest as it pierced his heart and knocked against his sternum from the inside.

I killed him, James... as sure as I'm sitting here before you, I killed Dan The Wicked." The air in the room seemed to sizzle and crackle with static electricity upon the utterance of that statement.

"After a long time just lying there, trying to regain a sense of moment, a sense of clarity, the pain now fully returned to the point that I nearly passed out, I finally crawled out from under him. I staggered around the shack and found a first aid kit. I managed to wrap my leg and shoulder as best I could, then I grabbed his keys, ran outside and jumped into the pickup truck.

I'd be in Colorado by now if I hadn't drove off the bank at the side of the trail and wrecked his truck." She suddenly smiled at James, and he was astounded by her mental fortitude. "Just what I needed, huh? To get into an accident after all that shit." Alicia let out a manic chuckle. "So I hiked it outta there, back to Bedford and spent the next few days licking my wounds."

There was no chuckling for James, though. Once again, he was overcome with emotion. He dropped everything from his hands, fell to his knees in front of her and placed his head in her lap, sobbing. Alicia comforted him, soft and gentle as a butterfly, and he couldn't help but wrap his arms around her waist, hugging her to him.

What shameful display is this, James... you fucking whimp! After all that she's gone through, and here you are being comforted my HER?

What the FUCK, Krouplitz?

"It's okay, James," said her Sentient Orbs. "We can assure you that right now, it's the position she prefers to be in. She operates so much better from a position of strength than she does being the object of another's pity. This is an important step in the path toward purging her demons."

"We're so different... her and I. Aren't we?"

"So different. Yet so right!"

"Oh, my dear, dear Sentients... you beautiful, wonderful Orbs, if I could only reach out and touch you right now, I would hold you so close to my heart... hug you so tight that I would nearly squeeze the Sentience right out of you."

"Your kind sentiment is truly heartfelt, James. Never before have we faced such a struggle, and never again shall we."

James continued to weep in Alicia's lap, the feel of her hand stroking his head a perfect immitation of his mother's caring touch. He hugged her tighter. "I'm so sorry, Alicia... I should be comforting you."

"I'm strong, Jamesy. I'm okay. In fact I feel much better now that I got that all out. You, on the other hand, are a big, lovable cream puff." As he did when he'd first heard it that morning, he now delighted in the sound of her laugh. He was certain that only Alicia, out of everyone he'd ever known, could be able to muster a laugh after an accounting of such a brutal ordeal, repleat with the wounds to show for it.

He returned to her Orbs. "I gather that the emotion of that moment stirred your meager influence to sudden heights of glory then?"

"We cannot begin to tell you of the struggle that ensued with Dan's malevolent Orbs the moment that we determined Dan's intentions. Aghast, we enjoined in a battle of wills with them that we shall not soon forget. The evil that dripped from them will stain us forever."

"Tell me, you precious bastards... tell me."

"We steeled ourselves and commanded Dan's Orbs to halt what was happening. We reasoned with them with every last ounce of our intellect, then pleaded with them to use their powerful, malevolent influence on Dan, to make him cease and desist from this atrocious act. They fought us and we cursed them and reviled them... but to no avail. They only laughed at us, seemed to become stronger, even more determined. They fed off of our angst.

We became infected by their wickedness, diseased by the dark sickness that radiated from their souls. We were caught in the blight of their evil.

We were out gunned, James. Orbs like ourselves have not the power to match such malevolence.

At least not without The Existential at our sides.

But you can imagine the great joy and relief that greeted our hearts when The Existential did indeed arrive by our sides at that moment... arrived to lend his support to our cause. Sublime in His bearing, unyielding in His goodness, His presence changed everything. Let it be known that by His fierce and determined will alone, did our influence over Alicia blossom into a veritable force of nature.

And you know the rest of the story, good sir. Behold the goodness of The Existential."

"Indeed," said James, "Indeed!"



To be continued...