My Addicted Son / A New Low

I haven't written in awhile, been busy with life itself I guess, work, got married last August. My youngest son got out of the army, got his GI bill, goes to school, works, has a girlfriend, bought a car..life is good for him. I am so proud of him. My oldest son is working and doing well also. My middle son, my addicted son, well, I don't know. He called me one day and asked if he could come over to my house (I was at work) and hang out with his brother. I told him that was fine. His brother agreed also. He visited, left, and everything was fine....or so I thought. This was on a Friday. My husband and I also had to work on Saturday so when we got home from working our shift, we got out of the truck and told me that it looked like my car had been moved. I told him I didn't see how considering we worked all day and I knew my youngest son wouldn't use it (its a Kia Soul and he has a Dodge Challenger). We commenced looking around and he noticed that the door to the workshop had the doorknob on the inside taken off but was still attached on the outside so you couldn't tell just by looking outside. He asked me where my spare car key was and it was gone (its always hanging on a hook in the kitchen). Not only was that gone but so was an expensive ring and necklace he got me for Christmas, an old tablet, my new tablet had been used and restored to factory reset, another heartshaped necklace that I got as a gift from my husband, and we are not sure what else. I couldn't believe it. I was, and still am, completely devastated as I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that it was my son who broke into my home. I called the police and filed a report. they called me a couple of days later and told me they found my jewelry (the ring and necklace) and that it was my son who had pawned it and he used my car to take it to the pawnshop. I got it back, but I had to pay the pawnshop what they had given him for the items.
He has been stealing from me for, well, I don't know how long. This time he broke into my house and stole from me. I guess this means he has absolutely no boundaries. He didn't take anything that belonged to his brother, nor did he take anything that belonged to my husband (who had an expensive Movado watch sitting on his bathroom counter). The tablet was my husbands, but he would have had no way to know that. It seems personal to me. He has even asked me for money since then and denied taking it. I finally told him that I called the police and got my jewelry back so I knew it was him. He got his tax refund check back (almost 600 dollars) and his dad sent him 170.00 the day before on the promise that he would get the money back when the tax check came, plus he had 100.00 check from a debit card refund that he didn't even know he had. Within a couple of days, that money was gone. He was staying in one of the nicer shelters in town, a Christian one, and left there after he got his money.
I have decided that, at this point in time, I am distancing myself from this situation and from him. I don't see where I have a choice. When I think back on it, I realize that all I am is an ATM to him. I am nothing. I'm not his mother in his eyes, just a bank and if I won't give him money, he has no use for me. I don't know that I will ever trust him again, nor do I know if I will let him in my house again. I love him with all my heart and I forgive him. Here is my problem though..why do I feel like such a heel? Parents are supposed to be there for their kids and help people who need help. I am never sure if I am doing the wrong thing or the right thing. Maybe no one is. I have a hard time sleeping at night and I still worry about him. He is 26 years old, an adult, but I still feel responsible. Sometimes I wish my inner battle would just take a break. Maybe one day it will. He has several warrants out for his arrest and I hope he does get arrested. Not because I want him punished, or because I think he needs to pay, but for his own safety. And I pray that someday he finds the strength and courage to want to turn his life around. I talked to one of his counselors when he was in rehab and she told me that if he wants to turn his life around, he knows what he has to do...it's just a matter of doing it. Maybe someday he will do it...I aways have hope.