Finding
God in Washington State
By
Dawn
November
13, 2014
One
year ago today my life was in turmoil. A few hours into the day it
turned 180 degrees and I was free!
Free
of the bondage of hopelessness, loneliness, guilt, shame and the
desire to end Gods precious gift. Why?
Let's
go back a few years. May 2009 to be exact.
I've
experienced more traumatic events in a short period of time.
Certainly more than my share. We all go through at least one in a
lifetime however, I was blindsided with many within three months.
Losing
a good paying job was only the beginning. In a blink of time I would
lose everything! Everything except my physical self.
I
have been fortunate to be well accomplished and have lived three of
my dreams. Not many can say that!
A
lifetime ago I was a kind, caring, personable, tenacious and fun
loving girl. The key word "was".
While
living in the mountains of Colorado (where I was born) I came back to
work after taking a short vacation.
I
worked a half day and was given the words I no longer had a job and
handed my last paycheck. What? Seriously? I worked half a day and
don't get paid for it I thought. Then walked out the door with my
belongings never to look back.
It's
amazing how much your life can spiral out of control with just one
event. It is said that a person finds out who their family and
friends are when being down and out. I'm here to tell you it's a
fact!
Following
the loss of my job I will list the major events that caused my
downward spiral.
Move
out of mountains
Stayed
at my ex-husbands house until ready to move to WA
Had
a painful argument with my son that would change the course of our
lives
Moved
to WA
Shared
a house with a sociopath. Feared for my life
Moved
into my car to be safe
Boyfriend
of 10yrs broke up with me
Suicidal
thoughts put me at Harborview twice in one week. It's hard to
grieve when you are hit in so many directions
Poor
mental and physical health caused by so many traumatic events in a
short period of time
Bought
a sailboat (didn't know how to sail) and lived on it for two
years. This was the highlife yet an adjustment on how to keep warm
and dry during awful weather
Took
a very bad fall on my 50th
birthday and tore my ACL, sprained both ankles, blew two muscles in
my calf and eventually needed surgery to repair the damage. This was
all while living on a sailboat which required a lot of balance
Moved
off boat
My
dog and I moved back into my car
Not
being able to find employment and the small amount of money I
received from the state wasn't enough to live on
During
all these years my mental and physical health were increasingly made
worse by my situation
Moved
into a "friends" house who were concerned about me and my dog
living in the car during bad weather. I thought this was nice of
them until they broke into my car and took Everything I had in it
Since
2011 I waited to be approved for SSD
Approved
November 13, 2013
One
has no idea how to relate to someone who has gone through such an
ordeal. To completely understand, one must go through the
heartrending situation.
It
is very hard finding new safe places to park the car to rest so we
wouldn't be disturbed. It's a scary world out there!
Now,
going backwards a few months I need to share my experience with the
Good Shepherd.
Running
out of places to park I was connected to Sidewalk for assistance in
locating housing and help finding other resources.
By
this time I was no longer the same person I once was and needed help
with so many things.
My
advocate was wonderful. She was able to connect me to certain
resources which could help. I was so drained and tired I had no more
strength to help myself.
I
turned my life over to God. I was done! If you lose the passion that
drives you, the end is near. I was there.
Through
extenuating circumstances I became connected with the Church of Good
Shepherd.
I
was unaware of what was coming. I hadn't been to church in over 30
years and was brought up Southern Baptist in Colorado. How weird is
that?
During
this last year with the church, the congregation and God would help
my transformation from a lonely, sad little girl with nothing to live
for to the fun loving, caring, devoted person you see today.
Generosity
is the one word to describe the help, support and care I've
received from this church. My church, God's church.
I
would like to thank Pastor's John and Chuck for giving me the
opportunity to see what God will do for me or anyone if only you pray
and ask for help. For me it was the fear of asking and being turned
down like so many times before. I was distrusting of everyone so God
took my hand and walked me through the door of Good Shepherd.
There
are too many people to thank but I hope you know who you are. I was
overwhelmed by the power of God and this congregation.
Without
Good Shepherd I would still be the sad, lonely broken little girl who
could no longer do things for herself.
I
came to this church in despair. Now I continue my faith by praying,
asking God to continue holding my hand. I was baptized here and now
show my thanks by giving back to the church, staff and congregation.
So
here I am full circle one year later with money, (you don't realize
what it's like to not have it until it's totally gone) a new
vehicle and a home to call my own. And quite a lot in-between!
All
of you have given Sapphire and I so much. Thanks to the church,
congregation and God I have returned with a purpose and reason to
live. My passion for marine science has returned.
I
light a candle in my heart every day for people like you. And who
would have thought I would find God in Washington State!
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