Accursed Love

ACCURSED LOVE

Jani Donaj was a simple man. He tended to his shop during the daytime, selling handmade wooden tools and home-kilned pottery. He felt a different calling at night. He was the last in a long line of magicians in his family. The majiks they practiced were arcane and powerful, but often profane and corrupting.

He first saw Arinaji when she was a young girl, parading through the town with her father, the King. She was a beautiful creature, full of youth and innocence. The youngest daughter of King Samtar, she had already reached the age of marriage. Since she had not been promised to any young man of the kingdom, she was the object of many men’s affections. Jani was no exception. It began as a simple crush, a wish to simply have her know his name. It then turned to a longing to spend time with her. Over time, his appetite grew from an innocent and childish love into a need to love her as a partner. Adolescence added new desires and soon he yearned to have her as his lover. The frustration of this secret, unrequited love led to despair, then anger and soon to a deep, burning rage at the woman who had unknowingly spurned him.

He could see the palace from his bedroom window. He sat on his bed roll, staring out his window at the tiny light coming from her window so far away.

“How can she not know my feelings? They burn so brightly within me. She must feel them, even from her lofty spire,towering over the city. Each day I pray that she will notice me, that she will look out from her windows and see this star burning brightly beneath her, my love calling out to her heart, hoping for an answer or even an echo.

“Ishtar, great goddess of the sky, why do you still ignore my prayers? I now turn to your sister, in the hopes that her attentions will yield more than yours. “

Jani’s hands groped through his charm bag and pulled out a tiny wooden carving of a snake wrapped around a half moon. He lit a tiny candle and watched as the smoke twirled up from the burning wick.

“Erishkigal, goddess of the underworld, grant me the power to satisfy this yearning within me. Bring my lover to me to finally share the joys that our hearts long for.”

“As Nergal sought and fought to have you as his wife, I ask for your guidance to bring Arinaji to my side. She is the light that keeps my life-fire lit.”

Jani Donaj’s prayer fell through the earth beneath him, clawing past rock and dirt to reach the ears of the terrible goddess. He had run out of options and clung to this final, desperate hope.

The smoke that filled the room began to swirl and twist, forming a cloudy mist that coalesced into the face of Erishkigal. The goddess’ voice was grating and muffled.

“Your love for this woman is strong. The power you seek shall be yours. She shall come to you and she shall be yours. As Kur once captured me, so shall you soon take hold of this woman.”

In his haste to satisfy his needs, Jani forgot the nature of the deity he had invoked. A goddess of the underworld cares little for the world of the living. Despite her great power over the realm of the dead, she has little power over the land of the living.

That night, as Princess Arinaji was sleeping, a single snake slithered up the palace wall and through her open window. It lingered near the foot of her bed before slinking up and over her silken sheets. It found its way past her legs and chest before settling near her head. A quick strike to her throat and the toxic venom flooded into her veins, filling her with its death-bringing liquid. The poison worked quickly, numbing her mind to keep her from yelling out as it slowed and finally stopped her heart.

Later that night, Jani fell asleep at the small table in the rear of his store. He had stared at the castle, hoping to see his beloved racing down toward him but he had been denied. His frustration led to drinking and eventually his stamina waned as alcohol and fatigue overcame him.

Two days passed, yet he heard nothing from his love. He noticed a buzz of movement and excitement near the castle, but could not determine the cause. Finally, as crowds gathered near the palace, the King made a proclamation. He fought back tears of sorrow and rage as he announced that his only daughter had been taken up by the goddess Ishtar, to serve at her side in Heaven.
Janie fell to his knees at the King’s words.
“Have you also forsaken me, Erishkigal? It is my fault. I turned my back on Ishtar and embraced a goddess incapable of understanding the painful longing I held for Arinaji. My prayer has been answered with a curse.”

Jani fell into a deep depression. With Arinaji gone, his life lost purpose. The pain from a life that had once revolved around her was replaced by loss and the realization that she was forever beyond his reach.

Deep into his third night of drunkenness, there came a knock at his door. He recognized the visitor immediately. The face was the same, but the cold soulless eyes staring past him were not hers. The beautiful face wore the same features but the life within was gone. The crystal blue eyes had faded to a dull gray, the same gray that now covered her once porcelain skin.

“Don’t you want me? I am here because you asked for me. I am here as a gift from Erishkigal.”

“A gift? This is no gift. I asked for my Princess Arinaji, not some cruel echo of her.”
“Then you are unhappy? Erishkigal said this is your deepest desire.”

“Unhappy? You have blasphemed everything I loved about her.”

“Come closer, my sweet lover. Perhaps I can change your mind.”

Jani was still repulsed by the hideous mockery standing before him. He wanted nothing more than to run into the night, far away from this living nightmare. He turned to step past it and was forced to lay eyes on it again. Despite the dull gray covering it, he recognized the perfect lips, the comely shaped face, the tender lines of Arinaji’s body. Though he had only known her from afar, he knew every facet of the woman he had sought for so long. If he could find them, despite the appearance, perhaps he could also find his love somewhere within. He continued to study the being in front of him, probing for the familiar beneath the sickening exterior. He continued to stare, even as the monster stepped forward. He was now absorbed in his close proximity to his quarry. Even tainted by some unholy power, she was here before him, standing and offering herself to him. Her lips were temptingly close and he leaned in to press a gentle kiss against them. His eyes closed as he remembered the warm, vibrant woman he had fallen for. He was thus blind to the small gleaming blade hovering over him. Her hands held it tightly before plunging it deep into his back. Over and over again, the blade sliced into him, tearing into his flesh and puncturing his fragile organs. The blade drove into his back seven times, one each for the gates the guarded Erishkigal’s home. Jani never broke from his tender kiss, the embrace making him oblivious to his fate.

He awoke from the kiss to find that he was walking down a dusty, craggy path, littered with boulders and stones. He had to walk slowly to keep his balance. There was someone ahead of him on the path. He called out, but there was no answer. He quickened his pace, stumbling over the loose stones, but soon overtook the other traveler.

“Where are we?”

The stranger did not turn to face him, but simply answered.

“We are here. Where else could we be?”

Jani grabbed the strangers arm and spun them around to face him. The crystal blue eyes of his love stared back at him beneath the brown cloak.

“Arinaji? Is it you?”

“My name is Arinaji. Do I know you?”

“Yes, my love. I am Jani. I am the one who has called out to you every night. I am the one who begged Ishtar and Erishkigal to guide you to me. And now we are here together. We are finally together.”

“I am sorry, but I do not know you. I am searching for my father. Please leave me alone.”

“No! I cannot. I have spent my life wishing to have you by my side. I have made pacts with the lords of the living and the dead to have you. I will not let you slip away so easily. Do you not remember the kiss in my house? I saw through the monster to find you within. Surely you must remember.”

“If you care so deeply for me, then help me find my way down this mountain.”

“Certainly, if only to prove my eternal love for you.”

The two walked slowly down the trail, carefully negotiating the unsteady slope. When they reached the bottom, they found a gate. Jani recognized it as the first gate of the underworld. He stepped quickly inside and gestured for Arinaji to come behind him. He turned to see her staring at the sky. He tried to step past the gate and return to her side, but the gate would not open for him. He clawed at the gate but it would not yield. As he violently pulled on the gate, a brilliant white dove swept down from the skies. It lit on Arinaji’s shoulder and Jani could see her eyes sparkle as the dove spoke to her.

Jani cursed the gate before him and yelled at Arinaji, but his voice could not reach her. She began to float, then fly and soared off behind the dove into the clear sky above.

A deep redness appeared in the sky, it seeped down from above and swept over the mountain before covering everything in Jani’s sight. He turned away but saw six more gates before him, each one opening for him to pass. He turned and ran through them, hoping to find some refuge from the crimson tide soaking the land behind him.

As he passed the last gate, he came to a charcoal black throne bearing a woman in even darker robes. He recognized Erishkigal and raced to her feet, shaking his hands at her in a terrible rage.

“What have you done? You have extinguished the very light of my life and brought me before you. I asked you to bring us together, yet now we remain apart.”

“You asked to have her at your side, which I fulfilled. You never mentioned whether that should be done in the land of the living. I hold no sway over the living, but my willing is everything here. That was the only way I could answer your prayers.”

“Then why was she unable to come with me.”

“I granted your time with her, but she was not meant for my domain. She is now among my sister’s realm. She is one of the doves in Ishtar’s heaven.”

“What will happen to me?”

“You now belong to me. As my husband was taken from me while I languished here in this forsaken land, so you shall spend eternity here apart from your love, while her last deathly kiss leaves a torturous memory on your lips.”