Love's Suicide

Intro

Sleeping single in a double bed, as the song goes, had left her weary and alone. She missed him, his presence beside her at night. The mornings waking up, patting the bed beside her to reassure herself that she was not alone and finding no comfort there, just a cold empty space, had left her numb.





She woke in the morning with the feeling that her heart had taken flight, soared so high up above the clouds and refused to come down to earth to beat within mortal confines. Upon awakening from the night spent in dreams of him, reliving her time with him, to live within the day, subjected to earthly confines held nothing of the safety and nothing of the security she had found in him. Each morning she woke and replayed this ritual, finding the bed, where Mick once lay, was empty had brought her crashing down to earth, to experience  the reality of the loss over and over again.





Even though she had long ago accepted that he had given his heart away… Not to another woman but to music. He was not happy unless he was creating music. He chose his heart’s joy instead of her.





Despite this, she could not let him go so easily. At night, in the moments before sleep, she would talk to him, “How did the recording session go?” Only the stillness of night answered her and she gave an exasperated sigh, deepening the hole inside her. She lost herself in this feeling of being unwanted, a burden to others. She had begun to feel the coldness of depression creep into her heart, robbing her of the words she once loved.





Kyra woke from an uneasy sleep, looked at her clock, 1:00 am, it said in back lighted display.           She reluctantly got out of bed and dressed in a black mid-thigh length, skin-tight black skirt and her most revealing shirt, low-cut and two sizes too small, also black. She liked how she looked in the color and she felt comfortable in the outfit. It was a true reflection of herself, and it made her look sexy. She just wanted to feel desirable and to know that others, men, thought she was pretty. It had been so long since she had felt that way. She just needed confirmation of her attractiveness. Now she was dressed for a night of fun and quickly left. Feeling like she was a “hag” before her time. She needed to be looked at this night but no heads turned her way.





*note: no heads turned her way








A few hours later………..








In front of Mike’s Bar & Grill, a place Kyra did not normally frequent, truthfully, she’d never stepped foot in the place. She stood in the parking lot debating whether or not to go in.





“Oh hell, why not?” she thought.





The construction of the building was crude looking. It looked like it was built in a rush and was poorly maintained being it was in a part of town in which more upscale businesses were located. The front of the building had no windows as most restaurant/bars did. The two by fours were visible and dirty looking, no landscaping decorated the outside and sand covered the sidewalk. Minute glass crystals crunched underfoot as she walked up the front walk to the double dors, then through them…


The interior was larger than one would think, judging by the size of the building from the exterior. It was dimly lit with table lamps on every table. The air smelled musty, old and the scent of smoke hit her like a slap in the face. Smoke hung in the air like fog, obscuring her vision. The smoke clung to her hair and clothes, making her feel that she needed a shower.