Whine & Cheese Company, Inc. - 1

Dear Nate,

Nate, Nate, Nate…tsk, tsk. Bless yore heart, had a break with reality, have we? (See "Invalid Item"  for explanation to “Bless yore heart.”)

You know, it’s interesting that some folks like pickles on thair hamburger and some folks don’t. Don’t you find that interesting? I do. I did a study on that very subject one time and I talked with every student in the Red House Schoolhouse and I found out that ever’one, not just part of ‘em, but ever’ stinking one of ‘em…I mean ever’one from 1st through 12th grade, uh, no, that’s 1st through 9th grade ‘cause Harley Jr. dropped outa the 12th grade to join the army. But I mean all 28 students, ever’one of them either liked or didn’t like pickles on thair hamburger. So, that proves that pickles is a issue with folks here in Red House.

But, Nate. Nate, Nate, Nate. Thairs a very easy solution for this issue. Just go the MacDonalds, they say “have it your way.” I mean, you kin say, git them pickles off’n my Big Mac and they’ll take ‘em off. Or you kin say, “load er up” and they’ll load er up fer yu. Nate. Nate, Nate, Nate, bless yor hart, this ain’t rocket science. Tell granny to stop rattling on ‘bout how she kin open nem pickles. Tell pop to take a hike, or maybe tell him yu gonna take a hike down to MacDonalds, and order up them Big Macs with double pickles.

Nate. Nate, Nate, Nate, Nate. Life is short. Don’t be controlled by your pickle fettish. Break the bonds to freedom. Stand up and be counted. Be yor own man. When the going get’s tough, the tough gets going. Take the high road. A man what don’t lie ain’t got nothing to say. Know what I mean, Nate? Yes, that’s right. Order a case of our Christmas Gift Packs!

Whinningly Yours,
Jim Whinnery, Head Whiner-in-chief