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Rated: 13+ · Interactive · Comedy · #1946404
What trouble can a human get into while working at a newspaper for giant monsters?
Chapter #1

Disaster Imminent

    by: Unknown
The day begins in the office of your employer, the sphinx Lexi. The editor of the Daily Tombstone paces on all fours and lets out a stressed out meow. “Another day,” she moans. “Another disaster waiting to happen. When is that Tim going to get in here? I can’t take the anticipation. I know he’s gonna make something bad happen. I just know it.” The sphinx groans and lowers her head.

It was a wonder that you managed to score a job in a monster city like Fearfield. However, you had little to no choice. You were a jinx. You managed to mess up every job in your hometown in the human world so badly you were exiled to the monster world so you wouldn’t be a danger to anyone else. You found yourself in Fearfield, a city said to me the most dangerous monster city for any human to live in. Once in Fearfield, you saw a poster on the Daily Tombstone building that said they were looking for a photographer and you decided that since you were quite skilled with a camera, you’d apply. The only problem, you had no idea that the editor in charge was an 850ft tall man eating sphinx. Lexi’s secretary let you in to see the sphinx, the only day she was glad to see you.

Upon meeting you, Lexi didn’t see you as a potential employee so much as a meal and was circling you with a sinister grin. “So?” asked the sphinx. “A human applying for a job meant for monsters? That’s a laugh.” “No ma’am, I’m completely serious. I’ve lost so many jobs and I saw the offer in your window so...” Lexi licked you before you could finish that sentence. “I haven’t had a raw human in years. What to do? What do I have to lose? Seeing as I’m a sphinx, I’ll cut a deal with you. If you can answer my riddle, I’ll give you a job, heck, if by some miracle you get it right, I’ll give you the best job security you could hope, n matter how badly you might screw up. Answer incorrectly and...” Lexi snapped her jaws to show you how dangerous she was.

“I’ll do anything you say ma’am,” you said. “I’ll take your challenge.” Lexi circled you before getting ready to announce her riddle. “Okay my little snack, here’s my riddle...” By some miracle your bad luck worked to your advantage that day because a clock tower rang loudly. “What time is it?” asked Lexi. “I’d say it’s quarter to one.” You replied. Lexi looked at her watch. “You’re right. Wait... I mean... that.. D’oh!” “Too late, I answered your riddle correction.” Lexi banged her head on the ground. “Damn it all! Welcome to the Daily Tombstone.” “Yes!” you yelled in victory


In the present day, Lexi lets out a groan. “Me and my big mouth. Who would’ve thought that one little human could cause so much damage and destruction. Suddenly, Lexi hears Kiki calling her. “Lexi,” she says. “Tim is here.” “Send him in.” It was at this moment, you walk in under Lexi’s door and wave at your employer. “Stay away from me,” warns Lexi. “You’re a jinx. Don’t come another step closer.” As Lexi backs up, her glasses fall off and she lets out a grunt. Lexi tries to walk up to her glasses, but you get there first. “Don’t worry Lexi,” you say as you walk forward. “I’ve got this.” “NO!” yells Lexi.

But you pick up Lexi’s glasses and shake your hand. “Looks like they haven’t been cleaned in weeks. I’ll take care of it boss. You grab a piece of cloth hanging from a nearby table and by tugging on it to clean Lexis glasses only to knock over a hot container full of coffee all over Lexi as the sphinx screams in pain. “HOT!” “Sorry!” you yell. “Lexi, your glasses.” You walk forward and try to hand Lexi her glasses as she’s recovering from the coffee but then you accidentally trip and fall forward shattering the glasses as Lexi lets out a groan. “That was my last pair of glasses.” She moans.

This had happened a lot since you started working at the Daily Tombstone. You were so much of a jinx that even the monsters weren’t immune. You spilled the ink you were supposed to load into one of the printing presses and caused it to break down one time. Put several monsters in the hospital due to chain reaction disasters and they even had to replace thirty security cameras because you managed to damage them unintentionally while cleaning them. The fact is, you were bad luck.

“Wow, sorry Lexi, I was just trying to...” Lexi gives an angry look but cracks a forced smile. “Accidents will happen,” she says in a restrained tone. “Don’t worry about it.” You let out a sigh. “So what’s my job today boss? Oh, I could empty out the ashtrays.” “Oh no,” growls Lexi. “I remember what happened last time you cleaned the ashtrays. Why do you think I banned smoking from the building.” “Cheer up Lexi, your fur grew back after three weeks.” Lexi just growls at you and you step back. She was forbidden from eating you due to the contract, but she could still get mad. “Let me just give you today’s assignment,” she says with a sigh. “And then we won’t have to see each other until the end of the day.”

“Yes ma’am.” You say in enthusiasm as you salute your sphinx employer. So what are you going to do today?
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