This week: The Way We Were Edited by: Kitti the Red-Nosed Feline  
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What do you miss from your past? What do you look forward to in the future?
Do we truly look at the past through rose-tinted glasses?
This week's Spiritual Newsletter is all about what was, what is and what will be...
Kitti the Red-Nosed Feline
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Do you remember what life was like when you were a child? Do you have good memories of those days? I feel quite blessed to have grown up when I did. The 80s and 90s were a brilliant time for music, movies, TV… it was a time of creative expression and experimentation. Back then, it felt like anything was possible. Peace, an end to hunger, an end to illness, an end to suffering… we were moving forward. We could do it! Perhaps every generation feels that way.
Still, it was great to be able to play outside without much, if any, fear. Your parents would tell you to come back home when it got dark, and until that time you had your freedom. We didn’t have smartphones, nor even regular mobile phones. You were trusted to be sensible, and it was nice. I didn’t get into any trouble, other than a scraped knee here or there because I’m clumsy and should have known better than to try skateboarding or roller-skating.
My husband had an even more exciting childhood. His parents had a smallholding, so he grew up in the countryside. Imagine having all that space to explore! He and his siblings had a wonderful time playing in the fields and woods and being surrounded by cows and sheep, chickens and geese. It wasn’t always easy. Having a smallholding’s hard work. He thinks back fondly to his youth, though. Again, there was so much freedom.
Life was cheaper, too. Wages were lower, of course, but it feels like you got more for your money. You didn’t need much change as a child to be able to get some sweets from the corner shop. If you wanted to go to a concert you had to queue to get tickets, which wasn’t ideal in bad weather but it sure was better than Ticketmaster with its crazy fees and ‘dynamic pricing’.
There was a nice community feel, at least where I grew up. People looked out for one-another. Supported one-another. You knew if someone was struggling and offered a helping hand where you could. We didn’t even need to lock our front door, and whatever was left on one’s doorstep would still be there when you got to it – porch pirates weren’t a thing.
There were a lot of independent shops, from greengrocers to cheesemongers. That meant a lot of choice for shoppers, and you got to know the owners who’d be willing to make an extra good deal for loyal customers. Many products were more durable as well, from clothes, to furniture, to electronics. Until recently, my parents still had a cooker from the 70s!
But… there’s always a but. We tend to look at the past through rose-tinted glasses. All of those happy memories are real, but there’s a lot to be said for progress on many fronts.
For example, the first house I grew up in didn’t have a hot water supply, nor central heating. We had to boil water for a bath, and in the winter you’d have frost crystals on the windows, it was that cold. Double glazing was not yet available.
The Cold War was ongoing and people received regular government advice on what to do in case of a nuclear attack. A popular Dutch band even made a song about the futility of working hard to achieve success and climb the career ladder because ‘when the bomb drops’ what will it all have been for? That was the kind of mood for a good while.
Racism, sexism and homophobia were not called out as much as they are now. The first time I experienced street harassment I was 9 years old; grown men feeling free to comment on my body. It horrified me to the extent that I wore my thick winter coat in the heat of summer, just to hide myself away.
Women didn’t have access to the careers that they do now. They weren’t as encouraged into higher education as they are now. Special educational needs were rarely recognised in boys nor girls – kids who’d now do fine with some extra support were then sent to special education, which didn’t help their chances of getting a good job. My own autism and dyspraxia went unrecognised. I did pretty well in school, on the whole (though definitely not in P.E.), but I cannot help but wonder how much better I’d have done had there been the same knowledge of special educational needs as there is now.
The medical field in general has made great progress. I was a C-section baby and the scar my mom was left with is quite gruesome. It is a huge, vertical scar patched together without, seemingly, any concern over how it would heal. We know much more about how cancers grow and spread, leading to more precise treatments. Mental health is much better understood, too, though treatments for mental health problems and disorders still leave much to be desired.
The Internet has opened an incredible amount of doors to the wider world. When I was a kid and wanted to know something I’d often have to turn to an encyclopaedia, which might have outdated information, or the library. Now, I can access pretty much any knowledge I want from anywhere in the world within seconds. Though misinformation and disinformation are a not-insignificant problem, those who love to learn can do so to their heart’s content.
We can also talk to, learn from and befriend people with similar interests no matter where they live. Support that may not be available locally can likely be found online. That said, it is important to find a balance – face-to-face contact matters. It is all too easy to become isolated and lost in a virtual world.
Access to a wide variety of faiths is an interesting development. Where one used to keep the faith or one’s parents, grandparents and local community, now it’s easy to learn about other belief systems. The ability to learn and ask questions can strengthen one’s faith, or it may be that another faith turns out to be a better fit. Some people lose faith completely; others who lacked faith may find it. Faith organisations can broadcast their message globally and you never know who needed to hear what they had to say.
There are benefits, then, to living through different times. No decade is perfect. Whilst it would be nice to be able to preserve the good and lose the bad, in reality we gain and we lose. It’s up to each of us to make the best of what time we have, and to leave as safe and healthy a world as possible for future generations. Hopefully, each will have it better than before. It would be great to make a positive difference.
I am glad that I got to see Guns N’ Roses at the height of their career, though. And that I got to explore the Internet in the early days without the pressures of social media – even if it could take hours to download a single song.
I’ve enjoyed my youth. I hope that the kids growing up now will have many fond memories, too.
Kitti the Red-Nosed Feline
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Spiritual: November 20, 2024 Issue [#12854]
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