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I kid around a lot, but pranks are not my best strength!
-Betty White
I just love pranks, man. They're great. I don't understand why people don't do 'em more often.
-Jermaine Fowler |
| ASIN: 0997970618 |
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Amazon's Price: $ 14.99
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Since you're reading this, I'm going to assume you survived another April Fools' Day.
The day puts me in a sweat every year. People seem to think that because I sometimes write stuff that some people believe to be funny, that I appreciate pranks.
I do not.
Well, to be clear, I appreciate pranks played on someone else. I'm funny that way.
I spend all of April 1 cocooned in my safe space, all day, every year, because people misunderstand this simple fact.
Even when I get up to answer nature's call, I have to case the joint first. I have a housemate, see, and one year I made the mistake of laughing for thirty minutes straight. She ventured up the stairs to see what was so funny and I pointed to a picture I saw: someone had rigged an air horn to a toilet seat.
Now, this has only about a 25% chance of working on me for obvious reasons - or, well, reasons that would be obvious if you saw me naked, which if you do I refuse to accept responsibility for your inevitable therapy - but I figure, why take chances?
Check the floors, check the sink, check the toilet seat, and for the love of all that is holy check the door because you never know when someone's rigged it with an air horn or a bucket of ice water or a fake spider. Or, hell, a real spider.
See? All those things are amusing when they happen to someone else.
April Fools' Day, therefore, may be Christmas to pranksters, but it's Veteran's Day for me: somber, reflective, and full of PTSD.
In the end, though, my worries were for naught... unless she's playing the long game. I didn't get pranked, not this year.
So, 'fess up below - how did you get got? |
Just some funnies that probably don't involve April, Fools, or Days:
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| ASIN: B00KN0JEYA |
Product Type: Kindle Store
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Amazon's Price: $ 4.99
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Last time, in "I Don't Get It" , I talked about jokes that you just don't get.
Apparently, no one got the joke, as there were no comments.
So that's it for me for now - see you in four weeks! Until then,
LAUGH ON!!!
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| ASIN: B07NPKP5BF |
Product Type: Toys & Games
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Amazon's Price: Price N/A
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Comedy: April 03, 2019 Issue [#9469]
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