A Day in the Life of a Worker Bee

A Day in the life of a Worker Bee by Dean Carroll

Barney lay in bed happily dreaming when a sudden ringing filled his ears. Scrabbling for the alarm clock he switched it off and lay back adjusting to reality. At his side Diana rubbed her bulbous eyes and got out of bed to wake up the kids.
âAlan! Julie!â she called âIts half past six, time for school.â Julie was up like a start while the teenage Alan turned over and pulled the pillow over his head. He hated Mondays, and most of all hated school, and it took a crane to lift him out of bed in the morning.
In the kitchen Barney was munching a bowl of honey hoops whilst perusing over the Honeycomb Gazette. Reading the business section he was studying the price of nectar. There had been a longer than usual winter which meant that there was a decline in pollen levels from the flower population, and this had shot up nectar prices resulting in costs of honey increasing.
"Read this!" he commented to Diana, who was combing the hairs on her abdomen,
"Nectar tax is expected to rise 10% in the next budget the chancellor has warned." he said shaking his head.
"How on earth do those on the poverty line feed themselves?. I wonder." Barney said sarcastically
Diana nodded her head in agreement. The kids meanwhile were arguing over the mess in the bedroom each one had caused, Diana flew in telling them to get ready, Barney decided to make himself scarce.

Opening the window Barney flew out clutching his briefcase and made his way to work, joining the other commuters to London. All around him other insects flew around him, some scuffling for space to fly in the open air, a demonstration of air rage. Some travelling to the honey factory, others worked in the medical profession while white collar workers entered the heart of the city employed in finance.
Buzzing to the stock exchange, he could see a demonstration taking place amongst the bee population about the price of honey. They were demanding to see the minister in charge of food production and the atmosphere was becoming tense, only the army ant police were keeping a semblance of order. Avoiding the melee Barney entered the exchange through the back entrance, disgusted to see a couple of vagrant blue bottles feasting on a piece of excrement.
In his office Barney went to the drink machine and ordered a lemon tea. Caffeine was banned by the government because it was turning some elements of the insect population into junkies or was causing violent disorder, so tea and coffee became a controlled commodity.
At 9:30 the klaxon sounded for the start of trading. All the insects that could fly buzzed to the trading floor while the ants crammed the lifts to the pit. There was frantic buying and selling taking place over different commodities beeswax prices were bid on in one section, paper in another. Fruit and vegetables were bid on and of most importance honey prices, which Barney dealt in. After frantic bidding, shares on the international honey market had shot up a whopping 3.6%, by the time recess was called. It was good news for shareholders but bad news for the consumer.
At lunch Barney and his associates made their way to the canteen hall in the basement. On the restaurant television screen there were news reports of the protests outside. Farmers ruined by the nectar drought were mutilating their wings and throwing themselves off buildings all around London, while there was looting of imported nectar stocks taking place in the docklands, the moth reporting the news described it as sheer anarchy.
Barney made his way to the kitchen area where a dish of maple stew was being served up. Sat at a table with his colleagues Barney grudgingly observed a bluebottle eating. It sucked up the stew then vomited it before ingesting it again. Barney hated flies with a passion, they disgusted him; with their foul table manners, and as for the state they left the toilets in, that was a sight for sore eyes.

After lunch the bell sounded for trading again, and the masses made their way back to the pit. After the reports of mass looting, prices increased to again to 4.5%. Because of the folly of the looters, they had made life even harder for the innocent consumer. He could see a black market opening up with honey sold at inflated prices to whoever could afford it, or drive them to make their own and break the law in doing so because of non-payment of honey tax.

At 5:30 the day ended and the stock brokers made their way to the various bars and restaurants that dotted the city. Determined to unwind Barney joined his friends in a drink in the Daffodil and Nectar, an upmarket drinking hole which the city bankers frequented. Offering to buy the first round Barney ordered five pints of Stowes fermented milk and they all drank it greedily. After five pints Barney lost track of time and ended up staying all night in the bar and ended up comatose in a corner until closing time, when a harassed looking grub shook him awake and told him to go home. Looking at his watch it read 12:00am, drunkenly he left the bar and flew home in the night, almost crashing into several television aerials before finding his way home. At the window Barney frantically knocked on the flat window, demanding to be let in.
An enraged Diana opened the window and looked stony faced at him.
"What bloody time do you call this? she hollered.
"I just went for a couple of drinksâ Barney slurred realising he'd left his briefcase in the pub.
" Well do you know Julie's upset, she wanted you to see her hive dance, she was waiting all night for you to come home.
" I'm sorry" he whimpered. "Can you let me in?"
"You can bleedin sleep outside Barney Dawson, the fresh air might do you good." she said brashly, before slamming the window.
Barney huddled in an alleyway for the night cold and hungry, amongst the drunken woodlouse and cockroaches, feeling sorry for himself.

The End