Silent Thoughts

A Fools Thought

That sad sudden thought,
so simple it it shatters your mood into a sad sunken mushroom all alone in the forest,
as your world appears to be falling from out of the heavens into the abyss.
The slow sudden jerk to jerk on the road,
as the driver steps on the gas jerking your body to sudden annoyment.
Yet those twinkling lights of Christmas time smooths your soul mixed with a sudden fog making you think the worse thoughts that you know will crash your mood,
as my trembling fingers have yet ceased to stop.
From past feelings of things or someone who matters most..
eventho theres always the one bug that runs away from being frightened..
Or that warming heart touch from your dear loved one Even the the highest hills shadowing the city lights,
the shimmering stars becomes just a simple injection like te flu.
the speeding cars are all just a mere picture.
Sitting..
and dwelling on this thought will always appear..
everyday lingering And this thought, this sickening thought beckons with me to the fullest of unexpected despair. eradicating my mind everyday,
that one thought..
leading to greater things only a fool could imagine..
Am I the fool?

Is it?

Is it?

My friends mother died today,

everone is filled with hate and sorrow.

She was my friend to but,

why do i not feel that hate and sorrow..

but of laughter and joy?!

Is my morbidity,

my idiosyncraticy?

Why do i not feel remorse,

i want to feel it.

To be scared for my love ones,

to love them more!

Ah, but nevermore..

ive lost the feeling long ago..

throught hatred,pain,sorrow,lost,nothingness..

i felt all and more,

but dose that make me inhumane?

To laugh apond deaths and killings?

I want to be human, to feel human emotions...not just allways sad..

but of fear, and much more.

What happened...

to witch i had lost that feeling?

Will i ever know?

Maybe not..

maybe so..

but maybe it for the best i dont have these feelings..

for then i might be called week.

Locked away, these feeling are..

no more then things i cannot reveal,

it is.. to dangrous to speak my dark secrets within me.

One day, one must know..

for how long can a i keep my self at peace? Forever hopefully..and ever,

casted away..for no return..

I miss you

I miss you warm hugs at night

As you brush my silky hairy away

I miss your scared back,

As my lonely face hides in it

I miss the smiles id wake up to

With that ever so sweet goodmorning

I miss your gentle kisses

And that warm look in your eyes

I miss you.

As you smile a thousand suns

Brightening my mornings

Filling my emptyness at night

For i am so lonely

With these longging past memories

I miss my king

Dose he miss his queen?

I miss him so much

As i sleep another lonely night

With out my love

I miss you.