Here is my short story I wrote. "Sweets Bakery" #2020653 it is a first person narrative story of a girl who has a need to 'fix' people. Who's friendliness and charm gets people to trust and open up to her.
I like the title and the poem itself. Your stanzas are a bit off. take time in working in with keeping the rhyming even.. like in first stanza, you had the first two lines rhyme.. great. but then in second stanza, it was lost- wording got off as lines were no longer even and it took more lines for you to get on track and then the words were the same to rhyme. By third stanza you were back on track again.
If you are going to use rhyming for your poems, you should go through the 'types' of poetry to find one type that works best for you. Some flow better, some are easier, and some just come naturally to some writers. my stanzas are typically four lines with every other rhyming. there is no thinking involved. just flows that way. Each writer finds his/her own way that ends up feeling comfortable to them. Keep working... the poem itself is really great. just needs tweaking a tad. Great job. :)
Impressive statistics! makes you want to just TYPE TYPE TYPE.... I am on a roll, of course as any book goes, it isn't from page one to page ***. it is in segments. Hoping that when November is at its end, I can put those segments together, read through and have it make complete sense! :) pick up from those 50000 + words and keep on trucking
That is really awesome. I have never seen Blitz poetry before. I will have to try this. :) Yours is the first I have seen other than the sample in the newsletter.... I think that you did a great job at it from the way that she showed how to do it and she had you as a link to use for it. You have inspired me to go for it!
Pretty good. Your stanza's are off balance with the number of lines per group and also wording is off , although your rhyming is still on. So you stayed true to your effort.
sometimes when writing, it is easier to 'not think'... just to let it flow when typing it out. Not to force things and see what comes out. Don't go in with a pre-conceived notion of what you want out of it. If you 'think' when doing it, most times it can make it harder as people are trying too hard to make things 'fit', 'rhyme'...
keep up the good work. try more than one way of poetry, there are so many. good luck to you :)
F.H. Hadley I like rhyming poems... my poems tend to all go in that direction without intention. This one, although not long in length, I think keeps focused from beginning to end on where the poem is headed.
Keep up the good work :)
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