I found your poem while browsing the Read a Newbie section of Writing.com. Being an orchid lover, this caught my attention! They are such lovely specimens of nature.
It looks like this was a contest entry. I hope you fared well in the Writers Cramp.
I thought this to be a good example of the villanelle form. It can be a tricky form. Your words were well chosen. The flow was good.
Thank you for sharing your talent with us! And, welcome to WDC.
I found your poem while browsing the Read and Review section at Writing.com. It instantly grabbed my attention! Being on the far side of sixty, myself, I can certainly relate.
Your descriptive words were good. The flow of your piece was easygoing. You made your point (always a good thing when writing!).
I sincerely hope you have many more Springs to enjoy!
I found your piece when browsing through the Read and Review section here at Writing.com.
Your word choices paint a sad picture of sorrow. I think your descriptive language is spot-on in this concise work.
Please check the usage of others rather ”other’s”. This is the only part that might need tweaking. I don’t mean this as criticism, but as a means to improve your prose.
I found your poem while browsing the Read and Review section of WDC. I must admit I found the title intriguing!
Your form was interesting and led the reader along easily down a light-hearted path revealed in the end. I guess we are always looking for another way to prepare the American delicacy Spam!
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Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert at reviewing. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an authority on reviewing, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: I think this is a lovely piece telling of a romance that is growing and maturing. It is noted how much you care for her and appreciate the person that she is. You have expressed your feelings quite well. Isn't that what writing is all about? Good job!
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert at reviewing. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: Thank you for sharing this lesson in U.S. History with us. I certainly learned something that I can share with my grandchildren on their next visit. (I may even tell my children, if they will sit and listen long enough). Good job!
Please remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site, not an authority on reviewing.
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert at reviewing. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: in less than 100 words, you have managed to capture the soul of the man. His longing for days gone by is expressed well in your short story. Good job! It creates a tangible character and the emotion that he feels when staring at what has become of his home land.
Please remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site, not an authority on reviewing.
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert at reviewing. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: Acrostics can be such fun to write. Although they may seem difficult, as well, you have created a good example of the form. Good job! Your piece describes fear and the feelings of the man about whom you write. It certainly does invoke emotion. Your word choice is excellent in creating this. Flow is smooth, too.
Please remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site, not an authority on reviewing.
Suggestions: My only suggestion would be to highlight the first letter of each line by putting the letters in "bold". Only a suggestion, though. It does not detract from the quality of the piece.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert review. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: Sometimes "balance" itself can be overwhelming. You talk about the carefree wishes of one who is a slave to obligation. Your form was good, as was your word choice. It only 23 lines, you have expressed what some people experience in their lifetimes, trying to maintain "balance". Good job!
Please remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site, not an authority on reviewing.
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert review. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: Wow! You pose some provocative questions and concepts here. I know that we all experience doubt of some form through our life. It is part of our frail human nature. You have expressed some of that in your poem. Your end rhyme is mostly smooth. The near rhyme in places did not detract from the piece's integrity (at least to me). The aabb rhyme scheme flows easily from one stanza to the next. Please remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site, not an authority on reviewing.
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert review. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: I think that you have captured Tink's feelings for Peter in this prime poem. It is a form of which I am not familiar. It is unique and I am sure not so easy as one might think. Your word choice really made this piece work. It flows smoothly creating a plausible story line.
Please remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site, not an authority on reviewing.
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert review. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: You describe depression with much emotion. Your words speak like one who has truly experienced this devastation. I know that many of us suffer from this disease at one time or another. Your piece flowed smoothly. Your word choice was great, creating vivid imagery.
Please remember that these are only my opinions, and are not meant to be those of an authority on reviewing.
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Regards,
Nani
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Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert review. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: I, too, am a Georgia native, and love any and everything about the beach, with the exception of hurricanes! Even living in South Georgia, and in your case, Central Georgia, we feel some of the storm's fury, but certainly not the brunt of it. It must be a devastating experience to have to pack up and leave paradise when one of these dread storms head toward your little piece of Heaven. Your acrostic was very descriptive of the thoughts and feelings of having your vacation postponed, or cancelled altogether. Your rhyme scheme was good, and your imagery was strong. It will soon be time again for another round of Hurricanes. Hopefully, none of 2013's storms will cause mass devastation like we have seen in the past.
Please remember that these are only my opinions, and are not meant to be those of an authority on reviewing.
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert review. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: It seems that I am spending a lot of time in "Random Review" these days. I have come across another of your poems there. I liked this one a lot. While it is a simple conversation between two lovers, it is so very credible. I can imagine having this conversation with my husband. Good flow! Good word choice! Good poem!
Please remember that these are only my opinions, and are not meant to be those of an authority on reviewing.
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert review. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: This seems to be very introspective to this reader. I think that if we all would seek answers to our problems from within, we would be surprised at the positive outcome. Concise and simple, your words speak much truth in just a few short, well-written lines.
Please remember that these are only my opinions, and are not meant to be those of an authority on reviewing.
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert review. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: Truer words were never spoken!!! I think that many of can relate to this. I know that I certainly can. I would love to be able to return to school and have the time to indulge myself in the arts, history, and maybe even a class or two just for fun. Your poem flows smoothly. I like the repetitive phrases that start off each of the first four stanzas. Even though I am past my "middle years", I share your desire to never stop learning. The flow is smooth, and the word choice is excellent. Thank you for sharing your talent with us here at WDC.
Please remember that these are only my opinions, and are not meant to be those of an authority on reviewing. Truer words were never spoken!
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert review. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: Please remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site, not an authority on reviewing. How beautiful! I wish that this could be--that everyone could see hope and light instead of darkness and despair. The world would certainly be a much better place. Your imagery was great. You could almost feel the desolation of the survivors, then the anticipation of hope that they felt when they "saw the light". Good job!
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. I am a member here on WDC, much like you. I am certainly not an expert review. I hope that you will find this review helpful. It is not my intention to criticize your work, but rather to make helpful suggestions that you can either choose to use or discard. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading!
Overall Impression: Please remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site, not an authority on reviewing. I thought this was a very introspective piece. Sometimes, we all get caught up in the choice of "what to wear". You have made this into a fine art! Good job! It reflects humor as well as emotion. The flow is very smooth. Your word choice is good and was very selective in producing the reactions of the reader.
Suggestions: None that would serve to improve your work.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading! I hope that you will find this review helpful.
Overall Impression: I can certainly relate to the poem! Sometimes, my writing does take on a life of its own. You followed the form of the ninette very well. It is a fun form! Your flow is smooth and your ideas tangible. The word choice was good.
Suggestions: None that would improve the quality of the piece.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading! I hope that you will find this review helpful.
Overall Impression: I enjoyed reading your free-verse poem. You have chosen your words wisely to create masterful imagery. You painted lovely pictures for the reader to follow. The flow of the piece is smooth from beginning to end.
Suggestions: None that would improve the quality of your work. I found no errors in either grammar or punctuation.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Hello! I am reviewing your piece for the Simply Positive Review Group. Remember that the opinions that I express are mine, as a reader on this site. I am certainly not an expert, but I do enjoy reading! I hope that you will find this review helpful.
Overall Impression: You have written a lot into your short lines. The story, while concise, is a lovely tale of new birth...both in the springtime day, and in the birth of a newborn! Good job! I think you have mastered the concept! Your descriptive imagery is good.
Suggestions: I don't think that I could add anything to improve your piece.
Please allow me to encourage you to continue to write and enjoy all that WDC has to offer!
Regards,
Nani
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