\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/gooble
Review Requests: ON
398 Public Reviews Given
1,019 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
Previous ... -1- 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 ... Next
1
1
Review of Dark light  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello! Wartime Author Icon

I really enjoyed this. I like sci-fi and you did great job with the imagery. It kept my interest from beginning to end.

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

A cause that can only result in the death, torture and destruction of millions, and has. The punctuation here is correct. I was thinking adding a dash to put more emphasis on the end. of million--and has.

if it weren’t for the paralysis that was the only welcoming effect of this light. again nothing wrong, I just thought it may have more impact on the reader if it was broken up. if it weren't for the paralysis, the only welcoming effect of this light

. I could only just make out my squad mates. this sentence is a bit awkward. maybe reword- I could barely make out my squad mates. or something like that.


A large tower of bones, that cast a sickly light off of the white of the bone just thought maybe you could replace one of the places you had bones with skeletons-- perhaps?




I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
2
2
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Happy Holidays! Sam N. Yago Author Icon

Thanks for entering the "Daily Flash Fiction ChallengeOpen in new Window.

Another great entry! I love your sense of humor, and how well you used the prompt. *Laugh*






My suggestions that you can use if you wish. *Wink*

I can honestly say, don't change a thing!




I hope you found this review helpful! Molly Author Icon



** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
3
3
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Happy Holidays! billwilcox

Oh Bill, I absolutely adore your sense of humor! I love the bit about the fifty digit account number and the remark about mailing a cow for less. *Laugh* I'm still laughing.




My suggestions that you can use if you wish. *Wink*

The only thing I saw was this -- {e"sick} {e"rolleyes}-- wasn't sure if it was intentional?



I hope you found this review helpful! Molly Author Icon



** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
4
4
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Happy Holidays! Sam N. Yago Author Icon

Thank you for entering "Daily Flash Fiction ChallengeOpen in new Window.

This is a hilarious story. I can see Merv climbing out of his box and ready to make himself at home. I like his sarcastic humor. Youd did a great job using the prompt and finding a way to explain why someone would find an elf under their tree.


My suggestions that you can use if you wish. *Wink*

None!




I hope you found this review helpful! Molly Author Icon



** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
5
5
Review of falling petals  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello! whitewind Author Icon

I found this on the review request board. Very pretty poem and full of emotion. I like the analogy of the falling petals and at the end they continue to fall, great ending.

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

This is just a pet peeve of mine, but the i's please capitalize your I's. *Bigsmile*

I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
6
6
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello! The Masked Potato Author Icon

First, let me say I love the name, The Masked Potato, hilarious! *Laugh*

I like this. You got a whole new take on the good and evil situation and one might never know, you could be on to something. *Wink*

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

The only suggestion I have is maybe double spacing because it makes a much easier read.

I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
7
7
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
A review of your entry for
Daily Flash Fiction Challenge Open in new Window. (13+)
Enter your story of 300 words or less.
#896794 by Arakun the twisted raccoon Author IconMail Icon



Hi, Sam N. Yago Author Icon

Your use of the prompt was wonderfully funny. I laughed out loud at Suzy. Great Job!

I didn't spot an errors or typos!

Thank you for a delightful entry. *Bigsmile* Molly
8
8
Review of They Wait  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello! E E Coder Author Icon

How sad, I can see the little old ladies waiting for visitors. You did a great job with imagery. I could see them all in my minds eye.

The napkin, clutched in a fist gnarled with arthritis, patted her lips again.- Very good image, my favorite in the story. *Smile*



Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

I didn't see any errors or typos and I throughly enjoyed the story as is.

I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
9
9
Review of Mark Of Respect  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)

Hello! Ann Ticipation Author Icon

What a beautifully written tribute. I like the colors of your hair representing different feelings. Great job!! *Wink*



Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

I didn't see any errors or spot any typos. In my humble opinion there's no need for improvement!


I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon



** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
10
10
Review of The Last Guardian  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Hello! Jack Goldman Author Icon

You had me, I didn't expect the ending at all. I loved it the suspense and eerie feelings throughout the story. What a great imagination you have. *Wink*

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

I didn't spot any errors and I in my humble opinion there's no need for improvement.*Smile*

I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
11
11
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello! Spooky, Cute & staiNed Author Icon


*Laugh* That is so funny. Kids can get so cranky, especially when they're that young. It's a good thing you had him as a shield. *Laugh*



Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*


I didn't spot any errors or need for improvement. I enjoyed the read very much.Thank for sharing.


I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon



** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
12
12
Review of Done  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Oh Bill,

What a sick demented tale you've written, but something made me keep reading. It's like watching a horror movie and a gruesome part comes up, I cover my eyes, but still peek between my fingers. I could see every bloody, gory detail. The part about the being castrated with pliers made me cringe, but I loved it.

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

13
13
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello! Ramses Author Icon

I like this creepy tale. I didn't expect the ending.


Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

I turned to run, comma may not be needed.and stopped short. I should have guessed.

“What?” I asked, badly frightened. just a thought: maybe instead of saying badly frightened you could show the emotions with the dialogue. You've done great within the rest of the story.

I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
14
14
Review of The Storyteller  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello! SendintheClown Author Icon

Welcome to WDC!

I enjoyed the story. You've done a great job with imagery. Very original too, I might add.


Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

Sadness seeped from [the?]sky to weary joints[,] and the storyteller thought of warmer times--times before the aftermath of the War of No Fault.

She had never experienced them herself, but, as a child, she had listened to the stories. there are too many commas in this sentence causing it to read a bit awkward.

The words of the sacred book shouted in her thoughts[,] “There is a noise of war in the camp”.put the period inside the quotation marks.



I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
15
15
Review of "Just remember"  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello! mislou Author Icon

Your poem says what a mother really feels. I can relate to your words so well. I have two daughter and that's the way I feel about them.

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

and you feel life is'nt isn't fair,

On the day's when you feel sad, but you really don't know why, You don't need the apostrophe on days.



I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
16
16
Review of The World  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello! Horsebackrider24 Author Icon

LOL *Laugh* I like this. We do say weird things that an alien wouldn't understand. I think this a fun piece. *Pthb*

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

Every family has its one black sheep

Mountains change to molehills: I think it should be mole hills

I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
17
17
Review of Sex  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hello! Gwendolyn Author Icon

Welcome to WDC!!

Okay, I admit it the title made me curious, and I had to read it. I thought this was a fun poem.

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

makinng love is all about the touch;

the feeel of hands carressing you allspaceover





I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
18
18
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello! Maynard Author Icon



I can see why you are a rising star. This was very well written and interesting piece. Thanks for sharing one of your personal experiences.



Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

Yet[,] that uneasy feeling prevailed throughout...Just a missed comma.



I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
19
19
Review of Cheat  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello! Shelly Author Icon

Ooh! Busted. *Laugh* Great story. Good luck in the contest.



Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

Just a couple of things I noticed while reading.

Finally[,] she saw him.

After washing her hands[,] she opened the bathroom door and searched the bar over for him.


I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
20
20
Review of hush hush  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello! Andraya Montreal Author Icon

Welcome to WDC!!

I think this is very well written and if I'm not mistaken a poem about love lost or unrequited love.

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

I saw a few of minor typos:

There's no sparkle in your smile

There's no use in playing waiting games

I'm lonely now im I'm not in the fire




I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
21
21
Review of Grandpa's Funeral  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (2.5)
Hello! Caera2 Author Icon

Welcome to WDC!

This is a cute story and you did a good job writing it from the point of view of a child.

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

Mommy had dressed me up in my prettiest dress that we brought all the way from Lawrence. The two word so close maybe using Mommy had me put on the prettiest dress, or something like that so there isn't the repeat.

We go and sit down, and some guy talks for a long time, and then we go back and get in our cars, and drive to the cemetery, where they're gonna bury Grandpa. there are four 'and' in tha sentence and there were other places in the story with a great deal of 'and'. Maybe you could make separate sentences, or try using other words. We sit down while some guy talks for a long time.Then, we get into our cars and drive to the cemetary, where they're gonna bury Grandpa.

I know it's written from the POV of a child, but the 'and' is over used.


I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
22
22
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello! 7up Author Icon

*Balloon1*Welcome to WDC!! *Balloon2*

*Laugh* Oh so funny! I love the way you worked in different brands of deodorant. I also love the the last line.



Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

I didn't see any errors or typos. Actually, I wouldn't change a thing.


I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon



** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
23
23
Review of Anorexia  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello! Reylenra Author Icon

The word you use in this poem create vivid images. It also made me feel for the loved ones who are also affected by the disease.

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

Her insides are the only things that
She has eaten in what seems like forever.
These first two lines are good description because it made me picture a body wasting away.




I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
24
24
Review of The Poets Head  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello! gringo Author Icon

*ballon2* Welcome to WDC!! *Balloon1*

This piece if very nicely written with great images and it is also thought provoking.

Some suggestions you can use if you wish. *Wink*

The Poets head is dead, You need an apostrophe for Poet's because it is possessive.



I hope you found this review helpful. *Bigsmile* Molly Author Icon







** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
25
25
Review of Ol' Fat Charlie  Open in new Window.
Review by Molly Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Bill, I saw this while in your port. The title caught my attention, and then the description made me have to take a look. *Smile* I enjoyed it. the dialogue brought the characters to life, and I could see Jack with his chewed head. The ending I didn't expect at all, and when Charlie joined in, I admit, I laughed. Even though it was scary the picture of him in my mind joining the dogs was hilarious.*Laugh*

*Bigsmile*

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

176 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 8 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/gooble