This sounds like it is written from the perspective of a person who has been in a combat zone and seen the harsh realities of Collateral damage.
a child's lost dream crushed beyond repair
How lucky a child is that has not had their innocence stolen. The world seems divided between those who know the harsh realities of life and the people who being ignorant of how cruel the world can be.
Have you ever noticed that the people who are ignorant, have a tendency to blame others for losses, as though the disadvantaged deserved what happened?
Wow! is this a true story? Was the lady in white, a near death experience, a hallucination or your rescuer?
I bet you feel lucky to be alive! Have you thought about moving to the desert?
The title was good and reflective of the story.
The Content was excellent. It was extremely well written.
What I liked about it the most was the surprise ending.
What I did not see was any pain of having gone through the trauma.
If it was real then you must just be thankful to be alive and be moving on with life instead of
dwelling in the pain of the loss.
Well written. This is a JelloKnees recommended read.
oohh! That was Good! It was freaky! I was not aware I was reading a horror story so the ending caught me off guard and was surprising.
The Title was good and reflective of the story.
What I liked best was the dramatic surprise ending.
The story flowed well.
That was Great! I do believe that you will be a grumpy old man like Mr. Wasserman was. There does need to be a replacement for Mr. Wasserman on your block or those kids and dogs will demolish that flower bed. The legend of Billy Dugan needs a place to continue on!
That was adorable! I really enjoyed that. You were a creative kid! We must be the same age I was in 3rd grade and 8 years old also in 1969. Reading your description of your teacher brought back memories of my own teacher and 3rd grade and her dramatics.
Good Job!
Women had it rough for eons!
I saw in what may have been a National Geographic magazine, that humans traveled from island to island using skins of animals that bloated with gas; they suggested that may have been how people traveled to Australia.
In Arizona there is a lizard that is suppose to be so tasty that it is a protected species. It is eaten on a stick. If you ever go to the Desert museum you will see them there.
That is Funny! I got a chuckle out of that.
The robber and the thief both take their kids out for ice cream. While it seems unplausable it is not according to the news and all the police officers being arrested right and left in Colorado.
The sparse small room was appointed with one desk, one chair, an empty filing cabinet a telephone and nothing else. Appointed? That word is awkward. Quite a heady day that was Alex remembered. Heady? I have never heard that word used in a sentence before? Maybe this website is open to other countries other than mine, and these words are in common usage where you are from.
This is well written. I like your introduction "as told by someone who lived it".
Yikes! What a predicament! We don't spend enough time and develop the relationships with family like we should. I have family I would like to reconnect with. I did not see anything in your story that needs to be changed or altered. Great Suspense story.
I think that this has been effective. Not a person I have reviewed has not sent a thank you since you wrote this.
Sometimes it just takes a kick in the butt. Thank You!
That was Great! I really enjoyed that! Isn't that how life goes; with plans, hard work and good intentions what can make a person is a little thing.
That reminds me of how I leaned how to do some investing.
That is a truly beautiful expression of the realization of love after the window of opportunity has passed. You have very well described the mourning period we all go thorough when we experience loss. The next stage is acceptance.
Every word kept me alert and on the edge of my seat from beginning to end.
We are all so use to our modern conveniences that if they fail or there are no groceries in the store we would be totally helpless.
You make a good case for preparedness as no-one knows what the future will bring.
Sounds very sad and lonely. I have had times in my life when I have felt the same way.
Then I had a very traumatic episode that I learned to enjoy the precious time I have without
judging myself to others standards. I now reach out and avoid Isolation.
This creates intrigue that makes me want to read the rest of the story.
You included the who, what, and when and I want to read more to find out the why of it.
Missing money something everyone can identify with wanting to find it and get it back.
I look forward to reading about Brandon's adventure.c
Clearly told the story with good descriptions. I am new to this site and don't have any Gift Points to give. You are evidentallly a professional writer.
I see a balance between the drama of what happened and detail of description that I hope to learn how to do.
Good Job!
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