Wow! it is a very well expressed poem , the emotions are really very strong. I like the idea of potraying both the sides about his and her broken heart. The format is good and metaphors are wonderful. However, I feel that the poem could have been little longer and could have benefitted from a little more usage of words, because I felt a lot of stuff was repeated and meant the same thing.
Overall:- a very good attempt and I liked the theme and style of the poem. It would be perfect with a little more work.
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
Hi! Deaths Door,
Wow! I think it is a very emotion packed poem. You have expressed the whole suicide atmosphere very wonderfully and interestingly. The title is an attention grabber. The rhythm is good.
However, I think that the rhyme in the second last stanza is little shaky. I think that the beginning was more graceful then the end. Moreover, the punctuation could have made it better.
Overall:- I really enjoyed reading it I think the word usage was great. I would love to read more of your work .
You deserve .5
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
God Bless You!
Have a great day!
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
I really like the humorous part of the poem. It is a very well written poem. From the title it seemed a very serious poem. I think the highlight of the poem is the ending which wins all my votes. I like the way you have structure the poem. I also like the concept of the mobile headset.
However, the word usage could have been better and i don't understand the word "duologue" in the 5th stanza first line. A little more elaboration and some corrections can make it perfect. Overall:-I enjoyed reading it and would love to read more of you wonderful work .
I would like to give this beautiful work
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
This is a wonderful poem with lots of emotion and soul in the poem. I like the way you have expressed your feelings in a free verse style. The theme of the poem is good. The eye catching feature of the poem is the title which really catches the reader's attention.
However, I think the flow of the poem is not very smooth which can be due to the structure of the poem. As some lines are too long this disturbs the rhythm and flow of the poem.
Overall:- It is a beautiful poem and I am sure many of the readers will be able to relate with this poem. With little changes it can be perfect. .
This poem is worth.5 stars for me.
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Well! This is a beautiful poem with very heart full expressions in it. I think the theme of the poem is very close to reality and death is the biggest reality of life. The simple format and the classic rhyming scheme gives it a nice touch too.
However, I think that there could have been more variety to the poem. SA little more usage of words and In the First Stanza I think "Dancing and Spreading" don't quite rhyme. Moreover in Third Stanza "Gloomy and Empty" don't rhyme too or it could be just me. If you replace them with something else it would be perfect.
Overall:-I like your writing style and like the way you have expressed your emotions, would love to read more of your wonderful work .
I will give this sweet and beautiful work
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
To begin with I must say that your work has truly impressed me. After reading this work of your I can say that your a very versatile writer. This poem is about a lost friend and your words have put in a true essence in it. The structure of the poem is really very good.
It is a short poem but display's detail feelings. I think you have a gifted way of expressing things. However, I think a little elaboration wouldn't hurt a bit. The word usage is good too. I like the occasional rhyme.
Overall:- This poem really touched my heart and I loved reading it .
I have never read anything especially a poem with the topic a library. It is your title which attracts the reader to wards your poem, which is a major plus in my book. As for the poem. I think it is a short and meaningful poem.
You have enclosed a river in a box. Which means that you have described library in depth and detail and yet managed to keep the poem short and to the point. The usage of vocabulary is excellent. Every thing is perfect
However, a little detail to punctuation will make the content of the poem more appropriate and attractive.
Overall:- I am very impressed by your poem. I completely agree with this poem and I am sure many readers will be able to relate with it. .
This unique wonderful work should get
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Wow! what a beautifully worded poem. You have greatly justified the theme of the poem. I really liked the format and the presentation of the poem. The title is a plus because it attracts the reader towards your poem. You have written this poem with depth of your feelings which is a difficult thing to do.
The flow of the poem is consistent and smooth. I like the occasional rhyme, it adds more variety to the poem. The lines in between the stanza's are the highlight of the poem. The usage of vocabulary is excellent.
Overall:- I am amazed with your work and I think it is one of the best works I have read on writing. com. I would be sure to read more of your stuff soon .
This truly deseves
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Well, I think it is a wonderful poem full of desires and expressions. I like the theme of the poem is very unique and the content of the poem is good.
The descriptive words are wisely used and the rhyme is good.
However, I think the flow of the poem is not consistent some of the line are too big and some short, this disturbs the rhythm of the poem. Moreover, in the last stanza, second lat line "When l grow up l'll have many a nice friend," this sentence has a grammar error, you could change it to "I'll have many nice friends. Then change the last line to add variety to the poem.
Overall:- I enjoyed reading your work, a little improvement in your grammar and tense it will be perfect .
For this beautiful poem i will give you
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
It is a very well written poem of love. The topic is very common in writing.com but this one is different.
The story line in the poem is good and the structure is good too.
However, I think the poem is in present tense from the beginning but in the end you make the poem narrated in past tense "something that you will not forget". Secondly, I think a little punctuation will make it more interesting and the flow will be smooth.
The rhyme is really wonderful and I like it.
Overall:- I liked reading your poem and will want to read more of your wonderful work.
Iam giving this one a four star
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Wow! I must say I am amazed at how well this poem is written. I think to write something humorous that too in a poetic form would be very difficult but you have done it. The theme of the college student and his first writing class is just brilliant and I am sure some of us might have experienced this type of thing at some point of our lives.
I love the format and the style of the poem. The rhyme scheme and the rhythm is just perfect.
I must say that you have a very individual and unique style. The presentation of the poem is really good and I think the word you add at the end of each stanza as a saying from the student is the Highlight of the poem.
You are quite versatile in your writing and I will be reading more it's not going to end here.
I enjoyed reading this poem and it brought a smile on my face.
Great work!
Again 5 stars
Write on!
Wow! a poem full of beautifull expressions. I like the title and the concept of the poem. The beginning reminded me of the old treasured and ships that would be buried under the sea in some of the old movies.
I think the use of vocabulary is excellent. The flow of the poem is good and smooth. However, I think that a little adjustment in the format of the poem and the rythem would be perfect. The background is really a wonderfull work of imagination.
Overall:- I enjoyed your poem and the effect of the water.
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work!
Well! I think it is a very beautifully written poem. The words flow absolutely smoothly with each stanza. I really like the theme and how you relate music to, devil and chaos. The word usage is also good.
However, I think that the format can be a little more consistent, with five lines or four per stanza. This way I think, the rythem of the poem will be better.
Overall:- I really enjoyed reading your poem and will be looking forward to reading more of it.
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get time, feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work!
Well! i think it is a very nicely written short poem. The expressions and flow are very good.
I think a little elaboration wouldn't hurt and some puntuation would make it better.
Overall:- I enjoyed reading your poem, you certainly have way with words and very good talent.
Keep up the great work!
Write on!
If you get free time, feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work!
I think it is a very well described poem. I really like the format style and the rythem of the poem.
The topic is really good and I think it is so true that you often want others to be honest with you, but when they are you really can't bear the truth. It takes a great amount of courage to do so.
I sure many of the readers will be able to relate with the basic theme of the poem, in some way or another .
Overall:- An excellent attempt on such an touchy matter.
Write on!
Keep up the great work!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
Well! i think purple is your color. I think it is a very new and light hearted concept. The poem itself is written in a very fun and easy going format.
Although, it is very difficult to write a poem with rhyming scheme on such a topic but I think you have done a brilliant job.
I really can't find any reall errors with it but I wished that you would have expanded it a little with adding another stanza or more.
Overall:- I really enjoyed reading your poem and Iam sure children are going to love it . It is so fresh and unique.
Write on!
Keep up the great work!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
I must say it is a very unique piece of poetry. You have excellently combined history with poetry. The explanation of the event is very wisely done and the is also kept similarand consistent through out the poem.
I am impressed by the usage of vocabulary, which is used with variation.
The rhyming scheme is also good.
I really liked reading your work!
Write on!
Keep up the great work!
If you get free time, feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
I must say that what a wonderfull imagination you have. I have never read a poem on such a unique topic.
I think it is very well written indeed.You certainly have described this topic very deeply and differently. I like how you have related cross, death of Jesus and carpenter together.
The flow and the word usage of the poem is really good. I don't think it needs any changes.
God Bless You!
Write on!
Keep up the great work!
If you get free time, feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
I really like the feel and essence of your poem. What a wonderfull relationship freiship is! and how beautifully you have described who friends are.
The word usage and expression are wonderfull.
I also, love the real feeling in the poem.
However, i think it would be better if you started the poem with the word "Friends"
Over all:- A work fuul of feelings.
Write on!
Keep up the great work!
If you get free time, feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
I think it is a very short and well written poem.
I like, the way you have made something as mundane as waking up in the Sunday morning interesting for the readers.
I think you certainly have got a way with words.
Although, you poem is very short , you have made good use of vocabulary and I think it is a fine piece. Sometimes, something short leaves greater impact than the longer poems.
However, a litlle elaboration would'nt harm.
Overall:- I enjoyed your work!
Write on!
Keep up the great work!
If you get free time, feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work.
I think it is really very well expressed poem. I like the way you have gotten into the depth of hope.
The word usage and vocabulary is used wisely.
I like the rhyming scheme of the poem.
However, I think the formeat could be more better, as some lines are very long and some short, so this makes the flow of the poem a little distrubing in the middle of the poem.
Overall:- I liked reading your poem and it is a great, the way you have spread out a positive word of hope.
Write on !
Keep up the great work!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work!
Mom
b}My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .{/b}
A very well written free verse poem. I think the scene you have created of the wedding , flowers and everything is so wonderfull and natural.
I think, your theme and concept is unique and not too common.
However, I think a little more organisation and little more usage of punctuation towards the end of the poem would make it perfect.
Overall:- I enjoyed reading your poem.
Write on!
Keep up the great work!
If you get free time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work!
I like the way you have expresed your activities in summer in this short poem.
However, I think with a few changes it would be a great work!
Firstly, I think if you could expand a little more, avoid full sentences and usage of little more of vocabulary would do wonders.
Secondly, I think that there is a spelling error with "tis" which should be this.
Thirdly, I think a little consideration of grammer and the use of punctuation would add a great touch to it. Try to write something more expressive about summer and bring out your feelings.
Overall:- A great effort. I liked it
Write on!
Keep up the great work!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work!
Mom
b}My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .{/b}
A very sincere and well written piece of poetry.
I like the way you have tried describing and expressed the complex feelings inside the mind. I know to write about such a topic is really difficult. However, you have done wonderfully well.
Also, I think that for this kind of poetry a rhyming scheme could have been a preferred option. Moreover, the use of punctuation could enhance your work!
Overall:- Nice work, I liked it!
Write on!
Keep up the great work!
If you get time feel free to visit my port and read and review some of my work!
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.11 seconds at 3:23pm on Dec 22, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
