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495 Public Reviews Given
497 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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1
1
Review of "UNGH!"  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
This is a House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Angus Author Icon

Initial Hook:{/c }
I was in your port, just recently, and I really loved what the story had to offer then. This story’s title and the description, too, invited me to a mystery which I couldn’t let go.

Strength:
No doubt that the twist which you gave to the story really shines for me. I mean, I just couldn’t see that coming. It all looked fine despite it not being the best relationship between the brothers, but then, so much changed within mere 8-9 lines. And the best part was that it all looked so real that I could literally see it happening. Man, I am in awe of your writing.
The emotion which was on display here, like the bitterness between the brothers was also done in a very believable manner.

The Part which impressed me:
Though the twist obviously takes the cake, but I think I would go with the way Jill tried to break the ice between the brother in the first half of the story. I say so because sometimes it is the everyday life things which are most difficult to write.
I really enjoyed reading this story. Now I know why you said that your last story wasn’t the best effort, and you had many more better stories in your box. You were bang on!

*Star* Keep writing and keep rocking, dear. More power to you!

Thanks,
Nishank
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
2
2
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
This is a House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Sparky Author Icon

Initial Hook:
The description in combination with the title immediately caught my eye. I have read your blog before, and I know they tend to be thought provoking, and sometimes deep. I wanted to know what you were up to in this piece. Also, since I have seen depression in someone close in my family (okay, that’s my father I am talking about), I always kind of keep an eye on the symptoms, me included.

The voice:
The way in which you build up what to say, is what I liked the most. It is grim, but hey, it does happen so frequently all around us. I found it to be a perfect reminder of how suddenly those dark thoughts can grasp us, and lead us on a path which is always going to lead to one and one destination only. I think you sad it in your way, that is affirmative thrown in with some rich imagery which makes it all even more relate-able.

The Part which impressed me:
The footnotes, especially the last line. Not everybody can be so open and honest about themselves, friend.

As I said before, I try to look out for the signals of the menace all around me. And yes, it always pays to be extra-sympathizing when you are dealing with the victims of that viciousness.

*Star* Keep writing and keep rocking, dear. More power to you!
Thanks,
Nishank
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3
3
Review of The Tree  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Stephen Scorer Author Icon

Initial Hook:
I have read you before, and I thought of coming again. Also, the title of the story seemed to attract me. Though there is nothing abnormal about the title, but for some reason I found it amusing and a little creepy. I wonder why, but that was the reason I decided to read what you had to offer

Strengths and Comments:
I was a little spooked out by the fact that the story did indeed turn out to be horror themed! I like it how you describe the scene where you see yourself on the tree looking at the car, able to hear the rustle of the leaves in your ear. It was a little peaceful and a little spooky, I can’t seem to make up my mind *Facepalm*

However, at certain places there seem to be some formatting, and sentence structuring related things.. For example, the place where you describe the scene where you were on the oak tree, the sentences seem to be too long and winding. I am not sure whether it was done on purpose, but I felt a little distracted as I read it.

Favorite part:
I loved the part where you could see yourself on the oak tree in your rearview mirror, waving to you.
I liked reading this twisted tale which was a mix of fiction [that you were on the oak tree] and truth [you must have seen yourself waving from the oak tree].

*Star* Keep writing and keep rocking, dear. More power to you!
Thanks,
Nishank
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4
4
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
This is a House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for spidey Author Icon

Initial Hook:
Clowns are as mysterious as a character gets. Blame it on the movie, the novels and what not, but that little creepiness surrounding him never goes away, at least for me. That is why the mention of the clown in the title caught my eyes, straightaway. I wanted to know whether there was something fishy about it.

Strengths:
It is an interesting plot based on a future dystopian society. The character’s most of the memory is a blur when he meets the Clown, and the man doesn’t have a clue of what a Clown does. He researches and finds out, and then the story reaches its grim end. Scary. I like the way you make me think about things which you didn’t say. Like how it is entirely possible to have a world with no joy, no laughs, and no recollection of what happiness is. And how ugly that must feel like. I could empathize with the protagonist for his apparent lack of emotions, and his hardened soul. Who wouldn’t if what all they have seen is war, asylum and death?

Favorite part:
I like the ironical end wherein the guy learns to laugh, but only at the cost of Bobo’s death. Again, you said so much without actually writing it in words. Loved it.

*Star* Keep writing and keep rocking, dear. More power to you!
Thanks,
Nishank
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5
5
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Jeff Author Icon

Initial hook and Feel:
I am in need of comedy, and some light reads. The moment I saw that in your port, I jumped upon it [I think I hurt my nose *Laugh* Stupid joke, I Know!] I love it when one takes a fairy tale and gives it a nice little twist. The title told me so, and I knew I wanted to read this story.
You are a master, Jeff, and I have read your stories before, too. The way you create the scenes, the dialogues, the subtle humor and the way you use it all to create a perfect story is just plain brilliant. That scene of the beast in the court was just one of those scenes which you gave life to. I like it how you capture the minutest details which actually go a long way in painting the picture in the head.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
The point in the story where you say the lawyer shifted uncomfortably. It made me laugh imagining that!

Concluding remarks :
I enjoyed this take of yours, and I was left impressed, as ever, by your story telling talent.
*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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6
6
Review of Red  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for TJ Marie Author Icon

Initial hook and Feel:
The dreams are fascinating, aren’t they? I have always thought of capturing one or other of my ridiculous dream, but for some reason I have never did it. I wanted to read what your dream was all about. Also, the name Red had a kind of threatening feel to it. It gave me another reason to dig my nose into your story.

I can definitely see that it must have been a very strange, and detailed dream. The clarity with which you describe it makes me think so. The court scene, the agony of the mother, the rage against husband, and finally the love for him – the dream had it all. If I could say one thing, it would be that the story actually doesn’t give a clear reason for all it happening. I mean, I know it’s a dream, and they have a mind of their own, but still if you could just extend it and give it a conclusion it would help for the reader.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
The scene where the lady pushes her child into the crowd, so that she escaped. Top notch scene that!

Concluding remarks :
I liked this story, and I think it has far more potential than what came out here. I wish I could dream like that, and then, capture it with so much clarity *Smile* Nice

*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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7
7
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Joy Author Icon

Initial hook and Feel:
I have read many wonderful stories by you in the past, and I remember how mighty impressed I have come out generally having read them. I always wonder about the thought process of such wonderful writers, and thus, when I saw the title of the article and the description,
I knew I had to read it no matter what. I hoped to get some jewels of wisdom which would make me think about them, and then implement them in my stories and make them shine.

What I loved the most, here, in this article was your knowledge about the different authors, and what they had to say about deep writing. You made it really simple for me to read and grasp their meaning, though I completely realize that implanting it in my stories would be a totally different set of challenge. There are a fair number of examples sprinkled around to help me relate to what you were saying. I now certainly do have the pointers to start in that direction and think about how to go beyond a certain level as a writer.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
That example which you gave about the dilemma between serving one’s country, or to stay back for an exceptional child is just spot on with the context of what you had to say. Though I am far lesser a writer to tackle this issue, but I can see a beautiful story coming out, with this as a backdrop.

Concluding remarks :
I liked what you had to say, dear, and I was frankly enlightened by it.

*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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8
8
Review of Lonely Hearts  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Supersonic-Hyper Writing Turbo Author Icon

Initial hook, Strength and comments:
The title had a tinge of sadness to it, and I wanted to know the reason behind it. When I read the description, it immediately brought the story “Gift of Magi” to my mind. I knew that I had to read what you had to say.

The pain and suffering you were able to portray in this story is very believable and commendable. I could relate to the poor lady with an abusive father. I felt sorry for her, and was finally relived when she met Darwin. Really liked that part.
The tale on the whole, though, was a little predictable. I kind of knew what would happen, which distracted me a little as I read it. Please don’t get me wrong, but at some places, the tale looked a little cliché.

Having said this, I can see this tale has potential. If you could inject some other conflict which would kind of keep my mind from guessing the end, then it would surely be an even better read.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
When she runs after Darwin, feeling guilty. I could see that happening in my mind. Sign of a scene well written, isn’t it?!

Concluding remarks :
I liked what I read, and I am sure you have the talent to make it an even better piece. Do call me in, if you decide to tweak this story a little, here and there, and want an opinion on that.

*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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9
9
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for typingrhyme Author Icon

Initial hook and Strengths:
I came looking for some fun, a light read, and the description of the poem hinted at that. Also, the title talks about an obsession which we all have in this age, and I was keyed right into this poem.

I always like when there is a story within a poem, and that is almost the case here. As I read it, I cant help but see myself doing all these things in almost the exact order in which you say it happen *Facepalm* I, too, have trouble concentrating for long in office, and I too seek out a similar distraction.

I like the rhyme scheme employed in this piece, and how you stick to it throughout the poem. Even when I read it out aloud, I can feel that flow and sense of rhythm.

Just a little formatting, like say center alignment of the text, and it would be even prettier.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
My favourite portion was where you talk about the social media thingie. Sometimes, I do feel that urge for checking my whatsapp which feels so damn urgent that I can’t seem to concentrate.

Concluding remarks :
I like this slice-of-life poem and how you told it in a very light hearted manner.
*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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10
10
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | N/A (Review only item.)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Princess Megan Snow Rose Author Icon

Initial hook and Strengths:
I am always stumped by prompts which talk about cowboys or pirates. Part of the reason could be that I am from India, and I haven’t watched that many programs, nor read that many books about either of those. But I am always curious to know how to write different characters, and what different to give to those characters to make them sound true. That is why when I saw the word “pirate” in the title, and a slightly unconventional description, I knew that I wanted to read it.
To me, the strength of the story was that how you kept the actual motive of the Von Pearl till quite end. I had started to wonder why a Pirate was being so nice and chivalrous, but when you explained it in the end it felt suitable.
Another thing which shines is the way you are able to portray the harsh life of the poor maid. There is clearly a sympathy value that you are able to generate from the reader for her.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
The last line is what gets me thinking, and thus would be my lasting impression. I wonder what fate she will meet from the hands of Carlos.

Concluding remarks :
Overall, this was not the exact Pirate themed story I came looking for, but I did enjoy what was on offer. I also loved the images at then – do you do them? Is it your hobby?
*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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11
11
Review of Sacrifice  Open in new Window.
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Rated: ASR | (4.5)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for sindbad Author Icon

Initial hook and Strengths:
2 facts got me to read this story. First was the title and the description combination which made me want to read a true tale of sacrifice. Not many come to notice with all the negative news flying in face all day.

Second reason was the hint that you are an Indian. Not many fellow Indians on this site, so I didn’t want to let go of this opportunity.

As you clearly told right in the beginning that it was a true story, but a story still needs telling. If you would have just told the plain facts as they were, I don’t think it would have moved me as much as it did now. I could literally see the Proud Father fighting his tears as he went through the rituals. I was sad, but it also made me realize that how many faces are there behind the think that we take for granted like our security. Thanks for that.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
I think it would be the place where we get to know that he had 2 more kids which met the same fate. My salute for that guy and his family.

Concluding remarks :
I really liked the way you put things, here, which made me appreciate the truth which is right there in front of our eyes, yet we don’t acknowledge them.

*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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12
12
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (1.0)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Moira So busy!~ Author Icon

Initial hook and Strengths:
Now, well this was new. I have once or twice thought of entering my story into bad story contest, but couldn’t. It’s a shame really because I would have been a natural in that contest *Laugh* Anyway, it’s the description of the story that got me in to read this story because this is something I have never read before on WdC.
But tell you what, you managed to eke out a laugh or two from me in this story. But guess what, I am not sure whether you are supposed to do that in an intentionally bad story *Facepalm*

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
The place where the guy steps on the escalator and his sleeves get caught in them, and he says he did it knowingly because he had a brand new shirt. *Laugh* Man, that was hilarious, especially when I imagined it to happening in front of my eyes!

Concluding remarks :
I think I liked this concept and your attempt at it. I think I am going to try one myself too. It would be so much fun to load it with just plain nonsense, which incidentally is my forte *Cool* *Laugh*
I will give it a one star, because I guess this is what you were aiming at when you wrote this *Heart*
*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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13
13
Review of No Way, José  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
This is a House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Shannon Author Icon

Initial Hook:
First thing that struck me immediately was the number of stories or poems from you which have one “Short Shots” Man, it must be like five or six of them. I thought, Gee, she must be a real talented writer, and then chose the one which was tagged as “comedy”. I love to read comedy not only because I enjoy it but also because I appreciate someone who tries to write it; it is hard to make someone laugh by a story, at least I have felt so when I write *Facepalm*.

Also, the image of that guy which must have been your prompt on the story cover helps me draw in. I have never ever had a cover on my story, but this gives me a good reason to think otherwise. Maybe, I will have one when I have the shot at the “Short Shots” this time. Lucky charm, who knows *Heart**Laugh*

Strengths:
The scene, oh the scenes you manage to create. Absolutely hilarious. Especially the one where the guy grudgingly confronts the husband. I must have laughed hard at least twice or thrice, as I imagined the poor guy being dressed in the attire as he was, and then being beaten up, too. How do you top that?!
There are also little jokes which you sprinkle when nothing eventful is happening which takes the story further and adds spice to it. Like one of the jokes where you say something like “the most adventurous he had been when he drove to office without a helmet.” Sounds like me!

Favorite part:
Having a trouble deciding this because there were so many. But, okay, I think the bashing up sequence takes the cake.
I really enjoyed the superb humor in this story. I hope to back sometime in your port to see what else magic you have to offer.

*Star* Keep writing and keep rocking, dear. More power to you!
Thanks,
Nishank
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14
14
Review of Notebook Memories  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Poolé Author Icon

Initial Hook:
The question in the description of the poem is what got me in. It is a very genuine question, and the kind of question we all seem to ask ourselves every now and then. I wanted to know your views on it. Also, the title of it fitted perfectly, and gave the poem a nostalgic feel. I liked it.

Strengths:
Wow, I didn’t see that coming. I was hugely impressed with the way in which you capture the truth of it. In essence this is what I keep telling myself, and people around me, that is to get a real hobby, for god sake. I liked how you sewed it in the overall feel of the poem. A big thumbs up for that.

Favorite part:
My favorite part is the one where you say “metal of the mind” Absolutely fantastic, and drives home the point perfectly. Though, I am no good at drawing, I get the essence of how you could actually feel the nature if you see it from the perspective of drawing it. Kudos to you for thinking about it!

*Star* Keep writing and keep rocking, dear. More power to you!
Thanks,
Nishank
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15
15
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for inayacto Author Icon

Initial Hook:
The description is what hooked me in. It is such a beautiful thought that I wanted to know how you would capture it. I have myself thought about something similar a lot of times in my life, but never thought of putting it to paper. Glad that you did, and I wanted to see if your feelings echoed mine.

Strength and comments:
The strength of this poem was the feel of it. I could literally sense that feeling of a little wistfulness when one is happy. You are actually kind of possessive of that happiness, and never want it to end. You captured it beautifully.
Another thing which stood out to me was the questions you posed as you told the feelings. They make me think of what would I do, or rather like to do with happiness. Thumbs up for that.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
Oh, I absolutely loved that line about the starry night. It is so, how do I put it, spiritually rich that it moves my heart. Top notch.
I liked reading what you had to offer, and i would like to welcome you in this community. I hope you enjoy your stay, here.

*Star* Keep writing and keep rocking, dear. More power to you!
Thanks,
Nishank
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16
16
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for the prodigal son returns 2024. Author Icon

Initial Hook:
It was only lately that I was thinking on this matter, and lo, I see your article on this. I wanted to know why did you think it was important to do so, and whether we though alike on some points.

Strength and comments:
I think you were able to make your point pretty clearly. I, too, agree with every word of this. I cant remember the number of times I have just waited for an acknowledgment from somebody I reviewed, not that I wanted to hear a “thanks” but whether they found it of use. Also, sometimes, I have questions which I want to be answered by the writer. I really love it when reviewers give in-depth responses to my reviews – means it touched a chord somewhere.

Lastly, I think I might have missed saying thanks to some review, but it was never intentional. I always feel like it’s a responsibility of mine to respond in return to some point which the reviewer might have offered. Clearly, we have the same thought process in this regard. I really liked the way in which you put your point forward in detail.

*Star* Keep writing and keep rocking, dear. More power to you!
Thanks,
Nishank
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17
17
Review of Unexpected Hunger  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Creeper Of The Realm Author Icon

Guess what, the Queen gets a surprise review. [ Well, I know you prepared the list and
all. Just saying *Facepalm* *Laugh*]

Initial hook and Strengths:
Out of the many items in your port, this one caught my eyes because of the title. I honestly didn’t get what it was hinting towards, though the tag of “Adult” did catch my eyes once I had read it. I wanted to know all about what you had to say in a story, having seen your talent in contest organizing activities! *Smile*

The biggest strength of this tale for me was the real life-lie description of the characters and their feelings. As I read along, it seemed like I was right there in that house watching the chemistry between these two love birds unfold. You captured it beautifully. [For some reason, my mind kept going back to FRIENDS program where Monica prepares a dish for Chandler. And since I am a big fan of FRIENDS, it actually made the story even more enjoyable*Laugh*!

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
It has got to be the last line of the story. The slight guilt, the sweetness of first love, the wit - it’s all there in those lines. It also helps to not end the story on an over-mushy note. I liked it!

Concluding remarks :
I enjoyed reading this story written by our Dear Gaby. I am sure I will come back for more [after 2-3 months, when I am out of GOT trauma, that is *Laugh*]

*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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18
18
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for bob county Author Icon

Initial hook and Strengths:
The title immediately struck me with its novelty. The description too is loaded with bravado, and I wanted to know the complete story. I was hooked!

There is a sense of grief being held back in this tale. I don’t know why I feel it, but at certain places I felt that the couple was enjoying the life to its fullest only because they knew they were going to be doomed soon. It gave the whole story a conflicting sense of emotions which actually works like a charm for it. It was a new experience.
I also like the way you show the love between the couple. It is tender yet steamy, happening in unreal circumstances but yet so real. Totally loved it how you pulled it off.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
I am going to remember it for the backdrop of the story, the nukes going on in the vicinity, the exploding bombs and what not. Brilliant!

Concluding remarks :
I liked this tale very much, and it surely hints at the talent you have as a writer. Top notch.

*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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19
19
Review of Carlie's Wish  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (4.0)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Chrys O'Shea Author Icon

Initial hook and Strengths:
I love to read children stories, and the fact that I am a 32 year old guy doesn’t stop me one bit *Laugh* When I discovered the folder which had the children story collection, it felt like I had found a treasure *Facepalm* I chose this story because the title promised it to be an exact kind of story which teaches a kid that everyone is special in their own way. Couldn’t have enough of those!

I like it that you have kept the story simple and easy to follow. There is a clear direction in which this story is going, and the plot is clear from the outset. I am very sure that kids would like it, too.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
The place where Carlie discovers wings when she wakes up in the morning. Nicely portrayed.

Concluding remarks :
I liked the story, and the little message along with it. A little tweak here and there, or another conflict to make it even richer and enjoyable.

*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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20
20
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for BIG BAD WOLF is Howling Author Icon

Initial hook and Strengths:
I have lately started to dabble in dialogues. It is fun writing them if you have a picture of the scene in your head. So, when I read that this was going to be all dialogues, I jumped into read. The title and the description coupled to form a perfect funny plot, and there was no way I wouldn’t come over to read.
There is humor in this tale, exactly as promised. I laughed at the innocence of the kid at several places. Mister Robber took a very bad decision in bringing his son along for work*Laugh*

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
The place where the son says that you can play cop and robbers later! Hilarious *Laugh*

Concluding remarks :
I liked this little snippet. However, I think there is a whole lot of scope for introducing even more humor, because the plot is amusing and funny. I hope you will try that. Please do call me in, if you do decide to try it; I would love to read that.

*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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21
21
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Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for A*Monaing*Faith Author Icon

Initial Hook:
The two words “childhood” and “misogyny” seemed a pretty unusual combination. I was immediately curious about what the story would be, and that is what got me in.

Strength and comments:
I like the innocence of childhood which is sprinkled throughout the tale. I could relate to that tiny shyness of his when faced with an opposite gender. I would rather say that I was shy of the girls, and they were disgusted with me, so it worked out pretty well for me *Laugh* Similarly here, I could feel the level of embarrassment of his upon being saved by a girl. Poor guy *Blush*

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
There were some cute moments in the story, and some of them would stay with me. Especially the one where Bree called the turtles “the green shell snails”. Pretty unique, pretty amusing. But that’s how children think, don’t they!
I enjoyed reading this story which took me to my childhood. Thanks for the memories.

*Star* Keep writing and keep rocking, dear. More power to you!
Thanks,
Nishank
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22
22
Review of My Uncle John  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
This is a House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for abcoachnz-Sometimes around Author Icon

Initial Hook:
The title has a longing about it which pulls the reader. I wanted to know how Uncle John’s life ended, and what caused it to be remembered by others. That is what brought me to read it.

Strength and comments:
There is a clear undertone of calmness to this tale which is hard to miss. I know there is suffering, clear as much in John’s life, but for some reason it feels a liberation of sorts. You describe the end pretty poetically, and that to me was the high point of the story. The way you said it all, rather than saying it bluntly is what was the strong point to me. Thumbs up for the wonderful imagery!

Just a tiny critique, here. If you could just space out the paras a little, it would be an even more enjoyable read.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
I liked the last line the most. Of how he decided to be with his woman, the woman he loved the most. This is beautiful, although a little sad.
I really enjoyed this tale of emotion. Don’t be surprised if you find me sneaking in your port for more.

*Star* Keep writing and keep rocking, dear. More power to you!

Thanks,
Nishank
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23
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Rated: ASR | (5.0)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for ♫~ Kenword~♫ Author Icon

Initial hook and Strengths:
I am not religious by nature, but I am a big fan of the power of meditation and how it works wonders by connecting to the spiritual force all around us. I wanted to see your take on it, and feel the bliss of reading a truly personal experience about the power of the meditation. That is what brought me to read this piece.

I like the clear message you give here, but what I like the most is how you show us the practicality of it in our day to day life. These are situations which we all face in our lives, but as I learn from what you had to say is that the trick is in being connected to the higher power all through the day. That way, one would be automatically be able to navigate through the obstacles lying in our path. I could feel the holiness of the lesson when I reached the end of the piece. *Heart*

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
I am going to remember the portion where you specifically say that the stream of water is now rising up now. It was such a calming experience even reading about it. Thanks for this imagery.

Concluding remarks :
I liked reading your take on it. I feel that we all are ultimately connected to a supreme consciousness in the grander scheme of things.
*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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24
Review of My Religion  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (5.0)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for bluefinnikusu

Initial hook and Strengths:
I am not religious by nature. I am more of a spiritualist than anything else; I say so because I feel a connect with the cosmos rather than rules which ties us down by rituals of religion. And this is something I discovered about myself. I was born in a family which is sufficiently religious, but I always felt a little detached from the concept. I discovered it in my teenage years, and thus, I wanted to know how and what you discovered in your self-discovery.

To me, there is a clear charm and elegance in the way you talk about your connection to the world around you, to that grand power which is above all petty issues. I was moved, and I felt I would cry at places, because honestly this is exactly how I feel. Big thumb up for capturing it so beautifully *Heart*

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
The favourite line of mine is where you say “stars haunt his head.” It is eerie, yet true if you think of it.

Concluding remarks :
I really liked reading your take on spirituality, and I am moved and impressed by what you had to say.

*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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25
25
Review of Dearest T.  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (4.5)
A House Stark review for "Game of Thrones" for Anshruta Author Icon

Initial hook and Strengths:
When I write about something, I generally write poetry. There are two reasons behind it. I feel that I have said it all, and the second that I do not have to state all the truth, and I can play around with the words to not make it glaringly obvious. Now, as I think of it, I do it because I am afraid to share the feelings with the world. But reading the title and the description of this story, I knew you were not going to hide behind a veil and bare your heart out. I wanted to know how you do it, and that is what brought me in.
I like the purity of the voice in this tale. I can readily relate the suffering of and the pain, but I am also happy that you are actually looking forward to life as it lay beyond those “blue eyes” *Smile* Life is an experience, and I am glad that you managed to take it in that spirit.

The lasting memory of this piece in my mind:
The last line is very special to me, because in this last line I can see pain, joy, and a hint of longing. I feel bad, but as we said this is life.

Concluding remarks :
Welcome to this site, dear. I can see that you have a way with words. I hope to read more of your works, some time soon. [Are you Indian? Just a guess...Please don't mind.]

*Star* Thank you for sharing your work! Keep writing and keep rocking.
Thanks,
Nishank
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