This is good. You have been able to convey how ncos feel when they are faced with a promotion that they have ever thought was to happen. The officer who spoke to him before his seeing Primus. He thought they were upset at him.
He is worried, the officer he saw suggested, he was mistaken with his numbers of the enemy that they faced. He was upset at the loss of the soldiers with him. He seemed to think that they should have lost less soldiers than they had.
The Primus has him enter the room, seeing a woman there with the Primus. He is concerned with what this was. It made no sense. Then they said to him of things he had only heard of as storoes. That were never realized before, as being real. He is told he is to join their units.
The woman handed him a stone, that looked like it was a flame. He was told to touch it and he did. What he experienced was something that had never happened before hand. He was confused.
More so, when Primus told him, that he had the talent. He was one of the blessed. It did not make any sense. Blessed how? Am i not cursed. He questioned the reaction. How could he be blessed. He saw what the other officer said about him. How could he be blessed. He wanted to be with his soldiers, but he was told he was to join this woman on his trip to where the talented were to go.
This is interesting. The way that the woman described the murder of a man. The murderer dropped the weapon and the defendant lifted up the gun.
The police do not agree with his doing this. They suspect him to be responsible for the death of the man. The woman has the other man who is there with her believing the story she has given them.
The man is blind, but is acting as a witness. If the police catch wind of this he will be in jail too.
You have created an interesting story for us to read. When he reveals he is blind is good. We do not know this, we are as the police are.
It seems that you have some vivid dreams, your dream has allowed you to allow the reader to see what you feel is real. The beings who preside in the night, the sound of breaking bramches awaken you and the pain that the trees feel as you move through them. The burls dig into your bare flesh, they are laiden with buds.
The dyrads watch over the enivironment where they stand tall. DReaming of what they can imagine for it to be. Their dreams must be realized by us. Dream Dream of beauty.
Your praise ronates with his beauty and gift to all. Believe and you shall be set free to walk the earth. You know who he is, we all know, but do we truly know who god is he sees all, knows all. He will forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who are before us. May he is perfect cast the first stone. No stone is ever lifted, because who is perfect you or I we are not.
We all fail for we are human. Human beings are errant we are sent to earth to learn, we learn as we develop into the beings we are. We want peace, yet we prepare for war. We want Justice are we just? we are not able to see the truth because we wish to know it. Do we really want to know, what is true.
the blessing is your kind and sincere words fall upon the page that is before you. The love of kindred friends and relatives that are before you. Their love is what you know to be real in your life, love is what you are offering to your friends and loved ones. Love is what you do, be true to those who know you and your eternal love of all around you and yours. Love will guide you to your truth. Believe in all your heart imagines to be yours.
this was wild. Great work there in writing this story. It held my interest in the story you have written. I enjoyed the reaction of Diasy as she was talking with her journalistic friend. Her reaction to the phone screen being covered by the coffee of her friend.
The way that she dropped the phone to look at the criminal responsible for his brother's death. The notebook has evidence to this fact.
That is beautiful, it tells of your sweet love you are feeling toward your girl. It makes the heart sing with joy, may you always feel this way toward her, love my friend will always endure if you listen to the sweet harmony she sings to you. Believe in the love that is yours to feel have it embrace you make it allow us to feel the beauty that is yours to feel. Love eternally is true, believe.
This is good. You have lost your love. The way you have described her is good. She was your one and only love. Keep on remembering the dream that was yours. You loved this woman who has passed. You tell us that the woman was someone you could not believe, but she believed in you as you did in her.Trust your heart.
Sounds like you had some fun at the furneral. The problem with your mother has it been taken care of. How is your aunt doing is she okay. The description sounds a bit like my first marriage. One of our witnesses backed out on us, I forgot to buy a wedding band.
The judge and his assistance married us. I forgot that we had better have a house to move into or a room. My first wife decided we could go to her grandparents to sleep until we figured out.
The grand parents thought we were getting married the next morning. They were German, so they could not understand what we were saying,
My wife's father thought, it was fake. It had an offical seal of a judge on the document, what a mess. That was my first wife, Not the lady I am currently with.
This is good. You have a way with your words. She has to watch her back as the enemy lies in wait for her. They have shown themselves to her, in indisguise as they were wearing masks. The person she believes was wtaching her fight the other members of the Vipers, her suspicion is that he/she were watching her fight. Th determine what she amounts too.
She is concerned with them watching her and studying her. She wants to know who was responsible for the deathes of her parents. This is well written.
Evert good, you offer us hope and dream of beauty that the new year will bring to us. You have done a good job. Selling us tomorrow, but it will come. Believe in the dream of peace that is what is needed now.
Believe in the dreams that is before us. Rest dare child. Take each day as it comes. Grab the rope to hold you to your moorings. Sensual beauty that is upon us, may it always be with you. Dream of sweet things. May your day be only gumdrops and honey covered toast.
This is good, you have given us some knowledge of your daughter's fear of catepillars as they appear in your yard. She is a scared of them, you have told her that they become butterflies which she likes. You thought you cured her fear, until she saw another one of them. It will take time for her to realise that they are needed to become butterflies.
Hi,
Thd story is quite a puzzle\, you have gotten my interest in the srory. She saw her brother by the spring, but he did not speak to her Wouldn't he say something to her The woman has dreamt of her and her brother arguing amongst themselves. She could not revall what they were arguing about,
The tiger seems a friend of hers as it borught to her the neat it had gain from it. It set the food down, so she could eat it. She was thankful, but did not partake of it before cooking it.
Sounds like you don't approve. The stars can do no wrong, but we have seen them do it, But they claim that they weren't there, But you saw them, heard them. LIstened to their claims of innocents tehy claim to be. Who was there, but them. They claim the drugs made them do it, Did the drugs make them take it, Or was it them that did this, I think it was them. Don't you? I do too.
They are responsible, their money can buy anyone or anything, BUt they can not clean the slate of a body in the morgue, it is still there. Father death looks at you and points his forefinger at you. you know who you are? Don't you?
Hi,
this is graphic enough. You have me interested in the case you are working on. I like the details you have given me to read. You have been able to heighten my interest in your story. Good work, You have an interesting tale to tell.
Your work is worth the read. Keep at it. Your words carry us into your realm.
This is graphic, I like what I am reading. He has to find a way to have it go to a case for the police to investigate and act upon. I like the premise of this case, that they bave to look into.
the detective has quite a case to work with, The attorney has been hired to help the dective about the case. The story has a lot of merit for the reader to read, good work.
hi,
the mystery continues. AS we are drawn into it. She has to be careful, you have inyensified her fear She there walking aomngset the old forms of power that were there once upon at time.
She knows that she may have been drewn into a trap Her nerves were on end. She has to cautious of what she is doing here.
You have drawn me there. Good work.
The opening draws the reader in, we want to know more. There has to be more of a story to tell, we know your going to spill your guts, I have my phonebook in my hands, I swing it at your face. Your hands try to stop the book from arriving there. You find you can't lift your hands as they are tied to the armrests of the chair.
You feel the book arrive, you taste blood as it slips into your mouth, you story has promise, I will take a look at the case. That is before you. You have a good opening here. Keep at it. It will come.
This is hauntingly good. You have created the same sphere of a superhero as Batman. Your words describe the details of what she will become. Good work, now that she has come into life to avenge her parent's death. you have arrived at the emotion that the character who was batman and why he did this was to avenge the death of his parents, destroy the falsehoods that are there.
hi,
This story is extensive. You have given us more than enough information to read to understand your story. It is able to have us understand what is happening there. The humans are wanting to learn more about other space visitors. They have been able to walk into space to learn more about what they are to learn.
They have trespassed and are arrested for doing this. they are claiming that they did not do this. They are going to court to find out what they are doing right now. The barrister is very knowledge able about the judge sitting before them.
They have suggested that they have broken the law as the attorney for the government there has suggested that they done this,
this is remarkable. The way that you have been able to have us know these facts. The fear that she is feeling as she drinks this tea from the woman's provisions. The woman seems to feel that she should see what the mirror is able to show her what will happen in reverse.
The young lady is unsure of what she sees there, she is not comfortable seeing this. The woman reassures her, that this will aid her in what she seeks. The way that you have written this here is good. You have been able to allow us to see what she is seeing in the mirror.
You have been able to allow us to know these things. The story is good, you have been able to allow us to understand these things. Your words are good. You have been able to
cause us to understand these details.
It seems like his mother does not understand what has happened. What happened is that he was being beat up for speaking about who was attacking him. The school supports the behaviour of the bully.
He needs aid to defend himself from him, Learning the martial arts is good, His buddy is willing to allow him to learn to do these things. I was a small kid in school, I had learned to use my gloves to protect myself. After I defended myself from one kid the battles ended.
You want this to be a fantasy novel, so somehow he gains a power from somewhere, This is a good way to portray the need for protection for the student being attacked by the footnall player.
hi,
I found the chapter to be very good. The opening still needs more details. When we get to meet the KIng and see the room you have done a remarkable job of doing this. That is what I was talking about. Nut bring us more description to do this for the opening as well. We want to be there, with your character.
Your main character is of importance to your work. Have us be there. So, we can do this to see what they are experiencing with you. Your story holds promise. I found this to be very good. Thank you for writing this. To allow us to know more about your book and character you are writing about.
this was different. You are writing about a figure who protects a sleeping person in his/her dreams from an attacker from there. You are able to establish the fact that this being will protect you from your attacker. You are able to bring to us the belief that she will help you in torment of attack from the enemy
interesting open. You should describe in detail about your surroundings of your character. The details are needed to allow the reader to feel as though theu are emmersed in the room where the character is. Is the tempature humid. is the air moist, the color of her surroundings. These are details that may allow the reader to feel connected to the character.
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