Very touching and sad because it so describes many who are in a nursing home. I know because I have gone to visit a friend there. Some whose family seems to have forgotten them. I pray for them.
You have captured this readers emotion with this and I felt it held a great rhythm while relaying such a great reminder to anyone who may happen to read this. Thank you for placing it out her for all to read. I have enjoyed it. Great job! SummerLyn
All a part of you! We are Other
Gee, you really have a great gift in my opinion. I love how this one flows and I love what you relay within each line. Great job! Thank you again for sharing what you do, I am actually learning from you with what you have placed out. This is how a poem should flow. SummerLyn
I don't know who Charlie is, but this is a beautifully done. One summer's night,
wild coyotes sang.
The trees rang with their chorus.
His companion compelled him to lift
his inner voice in sympathy...
in unison, all bayed.
I love this here...Thank you for allowing me to view your port I am enjoying what I am reading. SummerLyn
This has such a good rhythm to it, almost like a song. I like how you relayed her heart beating in that first line. It is different. My left breast thunders at the thought of you,
I don't see anything here that would need improvement, although I am just now learning poetry. Attempting my very first one, just the other day. I do have an appreciation for those like yourself that do it well and hope I can learn from you.
Thank you for allowing me to view it and I will be reading the rest here in your port. SummerLyn
Your port on the whole is quite organized. I have been reading through your various poems and have been enjoying them. Thank you for sharing what you do here. SummerLyn
I have just finished reading all this for the fourth time and perhaps will read again. It is very informative and clear to the student on instruction. Thank you for sharing your knowledge with those who are wishing to learn. SummerLyn
Charlie~
I thought to stop in and have a look at your portfolio. My eye caught this story here that you share and found it filled with much 'truth'.
I particularly like what you say in the end, because it holds the entire message here.
I hope we dedicate ourselves to realizing that loving each other means more than making excuses for each other. It means humbling ourselves to God’s will and forgiving each other. It means most of all that we should treat others, as we want to be treated.
If I can suggest double spacing between the title and the content itself, as well as perhaps placing the title in bold, that would be an added touch.
Carry on in your writings. I feel you have something here. SummerLyn
These are beautiful words relaying feelings from your heart. I felt it in my heart.
The flow itself, was excellent. Although I loved the entirety of this piece, I especially enjoyed this excerpt:
I offer you my love without condition.
This is my simple prayer staight from the heart.
Please accept me without hesitation.
What I did see was a spelling error, of which is a matter of simple correction in the following sentence of your poem..<<staight from the heart.>> correct spelling should be<<straight...>>.
Otherwise, it is my opinion that have a wonderful gift! SummerLyn
Good morning! I just want to say that your port is very well placed together. I am enjoying the images that you have here. Some very beautiful! Enjoy your moments given~ SummerLyn
I am so glad you did a write up on this because I always wondered if it were appropriate. I do, because I feel everyone makes mistakes and there isn't anyone's writing that is perfect. Thank you for placing it here and allowing me to take this poll. Very interesting. SummerLyn
'Spirit'~ I come back time and time again to learn this method. It is very informative and with practice, perhaps I have a chance at becoming "fair" enough to enter one of your contests. <smile>
Respectfully this night, I wish to bring to your attention an 'error'(if I may) in the following paragraph:
"5-- TEN TIPS ON HOW TO WRITE A GHAZAL—
Various practical tips are explained with reference to "MEMORIES--a ghazal", "MEMORIES--a ghazal" , which is a typical ghazal having a rhyme and a refrain, with nine couplets (an unusually large number. The minimum number is five and that is often deemed sufficient. What is more importantin a ghazal is quality, not quantity.
This ghazal is reproduced below:"
You will notice that *important and *in need to be separated.
Excellent. It brought a sad feeling in the ending, because it speaks a truth. Sometimes it is best to step forward and take that chance. Join in the dance of life!
"Come to the edge, I said. I'm afraid, you said. Come to the edge, do you trust me? I said. You took my hand. I pushed you; and you flew!"<smile>
Wishing you peace in your moments given 'Spirit'. SummerLyn
This port, I keep coming back to time after time to either see what else I can read, as well as reread some that I have already read.
This port deserves in my view, nothing less than a 5 and if they had more you would rate higher.
Thank you for the gifts you have placed within. Blessings to you my friend. SummerLyn
Excellent job on this. I hope you do not mind I drop by your port here...I have been reading a few works of yours and they are quite good. I will have to mark this as a favorite and stop back again.
Thank you so much for placing this out here for all to view. SummerLyn
Good day for you, I hope. I happened to run across your blog and thought to visit your port. I have to say that this one brought tears to my eyes.
It is so beautifully written and such a tribute to your mother. I am sorry for your loss. Wishing you peace in your moments. SummerLyn
"When I Seek"~ for me, this relays the mirror of your soul. It was beautifully done and so delicate. "Nowhere"~ Beautiful but bittersweet. Wording done very well.
"In Search of the Music"~ We all have a song to sing...Our spirits hold that song. I believe you relayed this well in that, sometimes that song in another is very faint, but it is there.
Thank you for allowing me to view your port. I would love to stop back when I receive more time and view more. Very beautiful work. SummerLyn
Beautifully done in my opinion. It brings the reader something to ponder. Very descriptive in your words. All in all it is a great piece of work done. I only wish I was good at poetry. I think you have the gift. Thank you for placing it here for all to view. I hope you don't mind, I gave it my review. SummerLyn
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