Very cool, I loved the ending. You did a great job with this. I felt uneasy when the shadow moved across the path. Just another bad day for the fat boy.
I like your way with words and the pace was perfect
I have a Vampire story in my port I think you might like "MY SPECIAL CHILD"
Thanks again for the read and I look forward to reading more of your work.
Thanks for the look inside. We all grow but keeping that kid inside will make life a fun adventure. I did not have my first child until I was 40 years old. Now she is in her first year at NYU. I had so much fun when they were little I called it my 2nd childhood.
Thanks again,I look forward to reading more of your work.
I found this to be very interesting and well done. Life is all about making choices. You seem very comfortable with your choice. I have a story in my port "CHOICE" you might find interesting.
Good luck to you and I wish you well. I look forward to reading more of your work.
Wonderful my man. You have to place this in COUNTRY MOMS CONTEST. Her port is the place on this site for Vets. I fly my flag everyday in front of my house. I was one of the last drafted, for a war no one understood. I am very proud of my service. Just like back then the defeat with dignaty crowd is at it again. Looking for the easy way out. Freedom is a human right.
I have a story in my port I know you will like "CHRISTMAS JULY 1969".
Thanks for a great read. I look forward to reading more of your work.
Billy you are a great writer. I see the boys in my mind like I am standing there watching. A writer places words together that not only come from their minds eye but what they take from living a life.
Another great job my man. I have to take time to read some more of your cowboy stuff.
EE, every cloud has a silver lining. My man I don't have to tell you again that I go your style too the max. This story has been a fun reminder to go to your port and read some more of your stuff.
Has your mother in law got over that little punk Brucie yet?
Wild Bill lived the cowboy life,
horses, rawhide and the love of a fight.
He played a hand that wasn't even a foot,
his raise was hot lead for that four-flushing crook
Billy another great job. I will read all your cowboy stuff. I started out making a living climbing on horse's backs that still had the wild in their eyes.
Its always kicks reading your way with words, my man.
Whisp, This is a wonderful story. I was lead down a garden path for a look into a soul of a sweet woman that was lost only to be found whitin a child's heart.
You captured "you can't judge a book by it's cover".
Thanks again, I look forward to reading more of your work.
Billy, I do not have to tell you again that I go your style too the max, but this is exceptional in the way you developed the characters. You could take away all the dialog between the Gabe and Melody and their chemistry alone is worth a thousand words. That my man is great writing.
I never review stories I do not like. One reason is who am I to judge. The other reason, writing is all about ego, why else would anybody think they could write words that other would read. I think a bad review is like stomping on a dream. I know it is helpful and can make us grow but what can I say my man, I still don’t dig it.
Now I do have a couple of things.
Gabe goes to the rest room to freshen up. I think a guy like Gabe does not freshen up, it sounds a little girly. “ Gabe stops by the rest room. Maybe a little water splashed on his face will cool the warm blood driven by his uneasiness.” (This just popped in my head,. I am sure you can do a lot better.)
Sky Marshalls are supposed to be incognito. “Gabe watched as Melody and Karen checked the rest rooms and completed their pre-flight inspection. The way he went up to the cockpit would have put the passengers in a state of panic.
The flight was going from Seattle to New York. How could they only have one hour of fuel and still going to return to Sea-Tech?
I loved the ending. In your description you said he sacrificed himself to save the flight. All through the story I did not want to see him die. It’s a dream come true.
Billy this is a great story. I hope you are cool with the things I pointed out. They are nit picky thing that do not hurt the story. Your description is some of the best I have ever read.
I enjoyed this story very much. The pace was perfect and kept my interest growing. I could feel her slipping into maddness. When I read something I like my imagination runs wild. I feel there could be a lot more story here. Where did she get the daggers? Was it her or was someone setting her up with post suggestion within her dreams?
I like your style and look forward to reading more of your work.
I am just goofing around in my head with the question. I just have no control when my mind runs off.
Thank you for putting into words how our beloved America is crying. Why is it always a punk coward like that has to leave this world with a bang instead of a wimmper. If there is justice he will suffer the pain of all the broken hearts ten fold that this punk left behind.
I found this very interesting. As a father who found cell phones to be a great way to keep track of your children. This is another way of keeping track in the very different world we are heading into.
I will check out the web page. Also I look forward to reading more of your work.
As the father of two girls I feel these words. Girls are so giving its hard to avoid pain like this. From the very start my little girls understand themselves and have pride in who they are.
Like your stuff and I look forward to reading more.
Billy thanks for leaving me out to dry. I hope you were man enough to to put a round right between that BUCK nasty fool's eyes.
"Cletus Brooks wore a red-and-black hunting cap all year round. He drank like a fish, laughed like a jackass, and farted homily just about anywhere he pleased. From under his mop of matted and greasy looking hair, he told anyone who would listen what a great hunter he was"
This part is so well writen that it could be a photo.
Thanks Billy it is always a kick reading your stuff.
I found this a good read and true. Looking into ones life all will find God. No matter how bad things are you will be able to find blessing waiting to be counted. Thank you for giving me a look into your life. All should find a reason for loving God.
Thanks again, I look forward to reading more of your work.
Nic, I like this story. I could feel myself walking through the townhouse. I watched as Charles planned his future. I liked the ending where the nightmare refused to be buried alive.
Thanks again for this creepy tale. I like your way with words and look forward to reading more of your work.
"A day will come certainly when
The US will be repentant;
When no longer it will shower
Bombs on the desert continent."
We should not repent for others sins. America is a land where all are welcome. I live for the future. When we dwell in the past our hearts will harden and our dreams will cry.
I have all the answers you seek. Read COVER LETTER in my port. I am looking to spread the word. Hopefully I will get it published soon. It is my gift to the human race.
Freedom is a human right. When you enslave your women's dreams you end up with what you have now in the Middle East. Look within your own hearts that is where the problem lives.
Good luck, one day even the Islamic World will understand Gods great gift(FREEDOM).
Geoff
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