Dan,
I truly enjoy your writing. I could easily visualize the tranquility of your world. Your prose flowed, an ease of pace and timing.
I the dream-like setting, redoubled his reflections on the characteristics of dreams was my favorite part.
This truly has the power to pull a reader in and leave them wanting more.
Great Job
Thanks for sharing,
Mik
Vivian,
This was wonderfully written, it invoke emotions of sadness, pity, anger and joy. (My opinion its not a good read unless I cry and laugh.)
A very well planned plot pulled me along, anxiously awaiting redemption. Which you delivered with finesse.
My favorite part was, Mr. Dennis standing up to the bully Russell and his lawyer.
Your writing flowed flawlessly. The only thing I would add or change, was a little more description of his surroundings, not only what he saw but smelled and felt (like the breeze). These thing add to the feeling of being there with your character.
I thought this was great fun. Very focused with great pacing.
My favorite part is how you incorporate all the things associated
with this type recreation, including beer.
Very good
A good story concept. Nice flow and pacing. I can already see a form to your character Bram, but don't forget to give depth to your other characters as well. Great start
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