Sad Love

I start walking away. I quickly pick my legs into a sprint. The New York lights blur. Not because I'm running so fast, but because of tears.

They slide down my face and drip onto the pavement, leaving a trail behind me. Good. I want things to stay here. Nothing leaves this city.

The sobbing drives me to my hotel room. I flop on the bed and think about what could have been tonight. Today, my life changed for the worse.

I can't believe he did this. On my birthday too. When we met in Times Square, I was expecting a kiss “hello” and then lunch at a cute cafe.

But that didn't happen. Nothing did. He just looked at me with those blue eyes and that fake, sympathetic grin. And it was over. That fast.

That's when I started running. I started running away from everything that went wrong. Every time I doubted my faith in our relationship.

Then, I start to re-live it. Our whole time together. It was almost as bad re-living it as it was good when it was happening.

I drag myself into the shower, and suddenly, I'm paralyzed. I stand there, limp, with hot water swarming into the drain at my feet.

It feels amazing. I feel as if all of my troubles are peeling off of me and being pulled into a vortex that takes them far, far, far, away.

Hopefully, they will never return. Maybe, I will wake up from this dream, and it all will be OK. But I won't be able to forget the dream...

It will haunt me like a ghost. When we really do meet in Times Square, I will remember the look on his face, and know, that it will never be.

I could never keep loving the man who's eyes I saw betrayal in. I saw the grin that turned my dream into a nightmare. I couldn't love him.

Not if this was all a dream, of course. But it's not. I don't have to make the decision. He's already made it for me. I didn't get to choose.

He chose to let me go. He knew that he had betrayed. He knew that I saw it in his eyes, too. But he didn't care. That's why he let me go.

And now, I don't know what to do now he's gone. He's off living some dream of his that I never knew. But I'm stuck here.

I can't leave. Not with out remembering all over again. I think that I might stay here, all my life. With the memories of the man I loved.