The Wedding

I felt a flutter as I drove past the church to the parking lot behind it. He was standing on the steps. My son, a man and best man in his friend's wedding.

I watched during the ceremony as my son paid close attention to his friend. He was trying to read the friend's face to see if he really was doing as he wished, to see if this was his friend's truest love. The look on my son's face said that he would be there if the world crashes in on the groom...be it next week, next month or next year.

A two year old boy (the bride and groom's son) hugged his aunt (the groom's 18 month old sister). I captured the picture and with a fast forward mind flash of the two babies at the age of the bride and groom now I had no doubt time would pass quickly, just as time had slipped my infant son from my arms to stand as a man next to the newly married couple.

The circle of friends, raised together and drawn closer through milestones but bonded through a tragedy no one should have to live through.

The summer of their sixteenth year they came together through the actions of one of their friends. Actions so horrific and brutal, so inconceivable that they closed ranks among themselves, held onto each other fiercely through the events that the violence precipitated. They survived. Not only did they survive but they grew, drawing from each other as outside forces tried to tell them how they should react.

When they told the adults "you just don't understand" they were more right than we wanted them to be. We stood in a circle around them, keeping them safe in their circle as they were each pulled into adulthood that should have been delayed a couple more years. We cried mothers' tears for their pain and padded the world around them while they dealt with it all the only way they could... by pulling from each other.

As each took the stand in that courtroom to tell their story the others quietly stood guard. When the last story was told and the verdict was in there was a small sigh of relief, a tiny spark of sanity freed from insanity and a short wish that life would be normal again. Maturity gained from the three years they shared showed them that normal would have to be redefined and they work still today to be normal again....

It will happen....

Today was another milestone they shared. A round of new beginnings has started.

The term I love hearing most now falls freely like "Mr." or "Mrs." from any other child. The term - "The Moms". I heard it again today after months as "The Moms" pinned the boutonnières on the ushers that numbered two to one for the bridesmaids.

The first time I heard it, realized it's meaning, was at the final press conference when it was mentioned by the friend most affected by the tragedy. No one else would figure it out but we knew and we felt the relief in the look on his face.

"The Moms" have been there for all of it, our own tight circle. We knew our place in their grief and we enjoy our place in their happiness and hope that life has dealt them their hardest blow with the finest gift attached. The gift - a bonded circle that will shift and wave as life takes them in different directions. A bond that will rise instantly to unite them against any turmoil daring to threaten any one of them. A bond that will intensify every joy beyond imagination through its uniqueness.

They are blessed and they know it. And so, on this day of a new beginning we offer a mother's prayer... that all beginnings bring this much joy to our children. That gift alone will bring equal joy to "The Moms' " hearts as we watch life unfold for our children.....