Love's Suicide

Chapter 3

Chapter 3





         On the drive home, she thought he concentrated too hard on the road and took it upon herself to provide a distraction.





         She reached over with her left hand, placed it on his thigh. Began to move it to the inside and back to the outside. The look on his face changed slightly and she could feel an intangible desire or need hanging in the air. She was not quite sure if it was just her whims or not and she let it guide her.





         Kyra leaned over to where he sat behind the wheel, reached down under the seat and pulled the seat adjustment lever. Slid the seat back an inch or so making him stretch to reach the pedals. Then sat up, began kissing his lips tentatively at first.





         Then her attention moved to his neck. He tried to stop her, knowing she would regret it in the morning but she would not stop. She knew what she wanted and what she wanted was him, at least for one night.





         Her slender hand moved leisurely up his body, from his thigh to his chest. Just as her hand moved from his leg to his lower abdomen, she felt a tremor run through his body and felt his hand upon her back. Slowly she unbuttoned his shirt and placed soft teasing kisses, promises of what was to come, at intervals upon his bare chest.





         Her small hands went to the waist band of his black colored jeans and fumbled with the button. Finally she unbuttoned them, slid a hand in his pants and was amazed.





         Startled, he inhaled sharply and jumped as her hand brushed his penis.





         She unzipped his pants and freed his penis from the tight confines of his jeans.





         She saw his desire evidenced by his erection and thought it was a beautiful sight. Such beauty should never be confined in tight apparel. It should be given freedom. She leaned down further putting her head in his lap and wrapping her lips around the shaft of his erect cock.





         He heard a slurping sound and looked down, as another tremor ran through him, raising goose-bumps on his skin. As he looked down, he stepped harder on the gas pedal.





         Now exceeding the speed limit, trying to get her home before his lustful desires took control of him………………





         Uh-oh, too late! He stepped on the brakes, hard, causing her to bump her head on the steering wheel. She groaned with the collision. He felt the vibrations of her groan and shuddered in sheer delight with the sensation.





         She looked up. “Home already?” She sighed a long exaggerated sigh. “That was fast!”





         Kyra opened the car door and swung her protesting legs out. She sat there for a minute letting her arousal dissipate but it would not. Then he came around to her side of the car, stood in front of her, wrapped an arm around her waist while putting her arm around his neck and hoisted her to her feet. He walked her to the front door and unlocked it, walked her inside to the living room couch and set her down gently upon it. Swung her legs up onto the couch, and removed her shoes. Covered her in the afghan that was draped over the back of the couch.





         As he leaned over her to get the afghan, a faint indescribable scent filled his nostrils. It was not sweet or overpowering but very subtle………..





         ”God, she smells good.” he thought and bent down to whisper, “Night.”





         Just before he stood up, she wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered in feigned sleep……”Stay And Play”. It was neither a command nor a request. To his ears it sounded more like an echo of his own desire not to be alone. He sat on the edge of the couch and sighed deeply. He wanted so much to, as she termed it, “Play” with her this night but for some reason he couldn’t stay.





         When  he told her that he couldn’t stay, his demeanor had changed drastically. From confident and sure of himself to shy and guarded… almost tortured, as if it hurt him to be in love with her like this.





         She guessed it was some previous experience that plagued him. Then she looked in his eyes and saw it was not as simple as that and the pain it caused was still quite raw. She had an overwhelming urge to comfort him but he had, suddenly, pulled away and refused to look at her.





         His refusal to meet her gaze only made her feel more at home with him and the sense of kinship grew overwhelming. She felt it like something physical being wrapped around her and every fiber of her being emanated something she had never experienced before………..





         She had seen many unspoken pleas within his eyes and, when he held her and carried her to the car, she heard them in the beating of his heart and in his quickening pulse, when she touched him. She heard them, at every turn, and she felt the pain he guarded like the national treasure.





         At times, her eyes saw only a cold mirror and the loneliness he felt. She saw it in his eyes at certain times, like now, when it seemed he’d rather die than be alone. But fondness was not what he felt. Given the chance, he may have described it as “Love”.





         She wanted to ask him what was wrong but she was afraid to know, so she held her tongue.





         He looked her at her lying on the couch. Her eyes seemed as dark as the night outside and he knew he wanted to love her from this moment on. But she had her own ideas of the night’s events and wanted only what he would give her this night. Nothing more… nothing less. He reached up put his hand on hers and closed his eyes…





         Then in the next second removed her hand from his cheek with a look of pain on his face. He stood up and turned to leave but he felt her hand on his arm, turned and looked at her. “…God, she is beautiful!” He looked deep into her eyes and……………saw within them a mirror image of himself, but also a softness which she buried deep within disdain.





         He wanted to touch that part where she hid her true self, to free her from the cage of lies. His only hope was that it might be enough to tear away “The Pretender’s Mask” and reveal the woman behind it.





         They held such passion that they made him want to cry and made his heart ache to know her and to “LOVE” her. They burned with such fire that he feared for his sanity. For what he saw in them  burned within him, too.





         He felt it burning deep inside… changing him, making him..…..different. Somehow she had awoken that part of him that slumbered and he knew he was falling in love with her.  He could not resist. She cast spell on him, without knowing it and the effects it would have on a him… A spell of love so deep and so complete that he found it hard to breathe.





         He put his large hand on hers, wrapped his fingers around hers and slowly removed her hand from his cheek. The expression on his face changed from one of pain-filled sorrow to one of weariness. And in that moment she heard herself ask, “Is something wrong?”





         He looked at her and he longed for her and it showed on his face. Ashamed of the fact that he could not hide the way he felt, he looked away…





         The desire to run her hands through his beautiful brown hair was so strong that she reached up, her hand trembling, placed her hand upon his cheek and searched his eyes for a glimmer of the raw lust he exhibited earlier, but she did not see it.





         Something in her voice turned his head and in the instant his eyes met hers, he leaned over her… “Nothing.” he whispered with his lips lightly pressed to hers.          





                   “…So soft.” she thought. His lips felt like silk. She wanted to feel them on her bare skin but that meant she would feel the cold metal of his lip ring too.





         Something came over him, suddenly. He couldn’t look at her without his very being aching for her in ways he did not want to think about.





         He longed for her to touch him again but if she did he would not be able to stop himself. And with his skin burning and his body aching for her touch, he stood,  without a word, walked to the front door that stood ajar. Turned and looked at her, asked himself one question. “How can you leave her?” then shut the door.





He walked back to the couch like a man under the influence. She held some kind of power over him. He did not know a woman was capable of capturing his heart so completely but nevertheless she had.





         Elated to see he returned to her, she grabs his hand and puts it on her right cheek.  She tilted her head, in a caressing gesture and slowly turned her eyes to him.





         For nearly six hours, he had wanted to be alone with her and now, all he wanted to do was leave before he did something he’d regret… But he couldn’t, something held him here. Something neither of them could describe or identify in any words at all.





         She slowly lifted her arms up and encircled his neck. Then she pulled him down to her level and he felt the softness of her hands upon his cheeks as she held him with his face framed by her delicate little hands and covered his lips with her own.





         Her nose caught an almost imperceptible scent. To her nose it was kind of a sweet, musky scent and it made her feel alive. It was almost electric and seemed to burn the air around her. He felt it too. There was no mistaking the feeling that lingered after their lips met. It was mutual desire…





         She stood, took his hand, and led him up the stairs, around the corner to the left and into the master bedroom…





         CLICK!    She flipped on the light. The room was oddly designed with a small closet directly left of the door. Upon entering the room the light switch, which she flicked on, was on a narrow wall which turned out to be a walk-in closet. On the left side of the room were pocket doors, he imagined they led into the bathroom. A king sized bed was on the wall parallel to the door and moonlight flooded the room from somewhere. He thought it was too much light for the skylight and walked two steps into the room, looked right and saw a sliding glass door leading out onto a balcony. Thick, light filtering black drapes, hung from a curtain rod above the door, but they were open letting in the night’s light.





         She walked to the bed… Her hand slid out of his as she did.





         He stood at the door wondering if he should follow his heart or go with his instinct. His instincts were saying Run…  actually they were screaming it.





         She stopped in front of the bed, unbuttoned her blouse, letting her ample breasts breathe as the garment fell to the floor. She turned to him, slowly and walked to him, her hips swaying seductively. She stood mere inches from him and leaned forward slightly and put her hands upon his chest, stood on tiptoes and kissed his lips softly.





         Her hands upon his chest moved slowly downward to his abdomen and back up. Then she stepped back a step and her hands went to the buttons on his shirt and began fumbling with them. She struggled with the buttons for a few seconds…...then under her breath, she said “Fuck It!”  Then came the sound of fabric tearing, as she gave it a good yank… Tearing it open, buttons flew in every direction. She nearly pulled it off him but stopped, instead she trapped his arms at his sides, so he could not move them…





         He bent his arms at the elbows so he may embrace her as he leaned down to kiss her.





         She felt him pulling her closer to him and felt something flow between them. It made her feel high, like the high one presumably would get from illegal narcotics. She grabbed hold of his buttonless shirt and walked backwards to the bed, pulling him along with her. She winced in pain as her heels hit the bed frame and she fell back onto it taking him with her.





         He put his hands under her and slid her up a little on the bed. Then he straddled her and removed the shirt…...





         Meanwhile she watched him slowly bare his chest. She looked up into his eyes then and saw a fire raging inside gentle passion and she could no longer stop herself.





         He leaned down to nibble her neck. Stopped suddenly and whispered in her ear, “I am sorry, I can’t.”





         She asked, “Why?”





         He made no reply only looked at her, then he laid down beside her.





         She was just happy to have company to fill the void in her bed and laid her head down upon the pillow and immediately fell into dreams.