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Sunday, Jun. 30, 2024

2:23am EDT

Members: 813

Guests: 1,267

Total Online: 2,080

Meth: a Ticking Timebomb Gone Viral

by Dr Gonzo

Rated: 18+ · Book · Biographical · #2258138

This is my blog & my hope, writing daily will help me see my progress and log supporters.

........

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Show Recent Comments

10 Most Recent Blog Comments:

Kåre Enga in Montana

Jun 26, 2024 at 11:48pm
In response to "The Pros & Cons of Living in a Corrupt State"

Ah... corruption... thy name of the game is $$$. Thailand works well for the wealthy. Now you know why Russians love to set up businesses, why ex-pats flaunt the laws, why people shrug their shoulders.

Good luck.

LeJenD'

Jun 20, 2024 at 12:37pm
In response to "Life is not a Popularity Contest...Fortunately for Me"

Over the years, I have purposely removed most people from my life. While I do still have family and my husband, I find it tedious to deal with even them most of the time. I can see that I am slowly removing myself from the world and its drama, but I feel it is something I have to do for my own sanity. I do talk to myself often, though, and find that more and more I am retreating back to a world that many others say isn't reality. I say "many others" because there are some who go to that world too. I don't think my husband and I would have lasted this long (24 years) if he was unable to go there, to that other world. We walk there together still sometimes, hand in hand - testing both our limits and that of the other world. Maybe I'm crazy, but if I am, I'm glad I have someone that can reach me inside the madness. On the other hand, sometimes I even need a break from him. I like the silence of being alone. That's one thing that my hospital stays and my time in the psych ward taught me. I don't need other humans in my life constantly for me to be happy.

Besides, the dogs are better listeners anyway - and they don't feel the need to tell me their perspectives of things or bring to light what they think I'm doing wrong...

Kåre Enga in Montana

Jun 20, 2024 at 3:24am
In response to "Life is not a Popularity Contest...Fortunately for Me"

I miss Pan "being there". I was healthier in Udon Thani but I'm getting more done here. i have no idea about the future.

As for people who are opposite of me? I have a few.

1 Like

Kåre Enga in Montana

Jun 17, 2024 at 1:07pm
In response to "The Final Chapters"

I found daily exorcise (my way of saying exercise) really helped. I don't do that in Montana. The weather hasn't helped (an excuse) as it has been incredibly cold for the last six weeks. Today is a chilly 6° ... may go up to 10°. I'm sure there's snow on those shrouded mountaintops! Walking in cold rain isn't my preferred cuppa and I know of no place to 'work out'. I refuse to pay for a gym.

I find your analysis re psychosis interesting.

Kåre Enga in Montana

Jun 13, 2024 at 9:44pm
In response to "The Freak Show"

My visa renewal was always easy, even when I was warned that it might not be so.

I've been having nightmares. I don't get them when I travel and seldom in Thailand. This room may be toxic (too dry, too dusty).

What do you find at the market? We had all types of vegetables, fruits in season, eggs, sauces/soups, live fish, frogs... even ant eggs in season. I could cook most anything in my rice cooker. The other nearby stalls had plenty of choices from roti to fried chicken to fruit smoothies to chicken livers on a stick.

Hope you are eating well!

Any rain?

Jun 10, 2024 at 4:21pm
In response to "Light Always Overcomes Darkness"

It sounds like you are falling into a better place mentally. There was something about the tone of this compared to your writing, say, six months ago that is more upbeat and positive.

I hope things keep on staying positive for you.

Kåre Enga in Montana

Jun 10, 2024 at 3:35pm
In response to "Light Always Overcomes Darkness"

Interesting observation about light. I can't sleep with the light on.

I have nightmares at home. They don't follow me when I travel. Far fewer in Thailand. I take no meds.

90 days ... there's some leeway but I don't know the details. You may want to ask.

Kåre Enga in Montana

Jun 8, 2024 at 8:04pm
In response to "Free of Addiction"

8 pm is an hour after dark. Here 8 pm is over an hour before dark. I'm affected by light. Bright warm day today but I spent most of it inside in a cafe. I'm home now but it's only 6 pm and I need a coffee.

It's been raining in Udon Thani. Wish I were there.

I'm healthier physically when I'm in Thailand but I'm emotionally better here.

Does anyone at the local Buddhist wat speak English? You frame one issue as "my lack of faith" ... but I'm not convinced of that.

I wish I could visit... someday...

Kåre Enga in Montana

May 17, 2024 at 1:31am
In response to "Exiting the Program"

No advice to give but I hope this works out. I haven't been feeling well and need to go to the doctor like I promised myself.

Kåre Enga in Montana

May 14, 2024 at 4:24pm
In response to "Sticking with the Program"

Pannya has been on strong meds. I reminded him to take them on time... still do. The dosage and meds changed over the 18 months we lived together.

Since you are in Thailand... consider a Buddhist approach. The Christianity I was subjected to growing up made it difficult to accept myself and let go. Thailand is all about learning to "let go". Forgiving oneself is a good step.

#124. Down...But Not Out
ID #1053249 entered on July 29, 2023 at 3:21am

#123. Finding A Way
ID #1053202 entered on July 29, 2023 at 3:21am

#122. The Ninety Day Curse
ID #1053099 entered on July 27, 2023 at 10:48pm

#121. What's That Knocking Sound? It's Just My Knees.
ID #1052974 entered on July 23, 2023 at 9:02pm

#120. Befriend Or Don't Befriend? That Is The Question
ID #1052752 entered on July 18, 2023 at 8:11am

#119. Choose Life
ID #1052701 entered on July 17, 2023 at 2:55am

#118. A Better Day
ID #1052663 entered on July 16, 2023 at 7:48am

#117. I'm Tired Of Riding This Roller-Coaster
ID #1052649 entered on July 15, 2023 at 9:12pm

#116. Beware TMHD...You Could Be Next.
ID #1052596 entered on July 14, 2023 at 9:55am

#115. A Good Day
ID #1052550 entered on July 13, 2023 at 7:56am

#114. Blog Post Rehash
ID #1052508 entered on July 12, 2023 at 6:34am

#113. Us vs Them vs Me
ID #1052467 entered on July 11, 2023 at 8:47am

#112. Too Big For My Britches
ID #1052411 entered on July 10, 2023 at 8:34pm

#111. The Hardwire Bypass
ID #1052365 entered on July 9, 2023 at 6:15am

#110. Oh, Sugar...My OTHER Addiction Rears It's Ugly Head
ID #1052315 entered on July 8, 2023 at 7:23am

#109. The Sum of Three
ID #1052274 entered on July 7, 2023 at 4:55am

#108. Replacing Internal Chaos with Peace
ID #1052222 entered on July 6, 2023 at 6:00am

#107. What Do You Say When You Have Nothing To Say?
ID #1052189 entered on July 5, 2023 at 10:20am

#106. Some People Ride in the Rain, Others Don't Bother
ID #1052131 entered on July 4, 2023 at 8:52am

#105. The Devil Finds Work for Idle Hands
ID #1052060 entered on July 3, 2023 at 7:15am

#104. George, The Happy Giraffe
ID #1052001 entered on July 2, 2023 at 6:26am

#103. And The Winner Is...
ID #1051944 entered on July 1, 2023 at 1:52am

#102. You Can Lead a Human Towards Happiness, But...
ID #1051887 entered on July 18, 2023 at 9:57pm

#101. It Depends On What You're Used To
ID #1051803 entered on June 29, 2023 at 6:57am

#100. The Chicken or the Egg?
ID #1051696 entered on June 28, 2023 at 7:52am

#99. What I Need To Change
ID #1051651 entered on June 27, 2023 at 6:50am

#98. Tell Me I Can't...And Watch Me
ID #1051599 entered on June 26, 2023 at 4:45am

#97. A Most Selfless Act
ID #1051558 entered on June 25, 2023 at 7:54am

#96. Floating on a Sea of Guilt Ridden Relief
ID #1051517 entered on June 24, 2023 at 8:42pm

#95. A Sad Day to Rejoice
ID #1051500 entered on June 23, 2023 at 7:35pm

#94. Regret; Misconceptions vs Reality
ID #1051446 entered on June 22, 2023 at 10:36am

#93. Damn Hormones
ID #1051368 entered on June 20, 2023 at 8:47am

#92. Until I Can Go No Further
ID #1051304 entered on June 19, 2023 at 6:16am

#91. Appreciating the Bitter Taste of Failure
ID #1051209 entered on June 18, 2023 at 5:35am

#90. And the Third Best Poet on WdC goes to...
ID #1051164 entered on June 17, 2023 at 8:44pm

#89. A Worthwhile Plan. Part II
ID #1051092 entered on June 18, 2023 at 10:35pm

#88. A Worthwhile Plan. Part I.
ID #1051091 entered on June 15, 2023 at 8:29am

#87. What Would You Do If Told You Only Have a Year To Live
ID #1051056 entered on June 14, 2023 at 11:16am

#86. Blog 2.0
ID #1051040 entered on June 14, 2023 at 1:56am

#85. Can We Change The World Or Are We Beaten Before We Even Try?
ID #1051038 entered on June 14, 2023 at 12:57am

#84. When is a Blog Not a Blog?
ID #1033469 entered on June 7, 2022 at 9:11am

#83. This Battle I Wage
ID #1033330 entered on June 7, 2022 at 6:00am

#82. The Apathy of Community
ID #1033136 entered on June 7, 2022 at 6:01am

#81. Increments
ID #1033090 entered on May 31, 2022 at 9:09pm

#80. Let It Be
ID #1033044 entered on May 30, 2022 at 7:22am

#79. Fabric Softener vs Washing Detergent vs Sanity
ID #1032950 entered on May 28, 2022 at 7:15pm

#78. The Story of the Gay Hairdresser
ID #1032918 entered on May 27, 2022 at 8:31am

#77. Introducing My Friend, Mr Don.T. Farquithme
ID #1032915 entered on May 27, 2022 at 4:00am

#76. The Inevitability of Things
ID #1032879 entered on May 26, 2022 at 7:44pm

#75. What Makes YOU Happy? Are You Happy? And if not, why? Part 2
ID #1032828 entered on May 25, 2022 at 1:01am

#74. What Makes YOU Happy? Are You Happy? And if not, why? Part 1
ID #1032804 entered on May 25, 2022 at 1:02am

#73. Confrontation...Good or Bad?
ID #1032751 entered on May 23, 2022 at 8:10am

#72. Just Another Day? I Don't Think So
ID #1032718 entered on May 22, 2022 at 9:30am

#71. Arm I in Dis Fur Da Muney? Lucki Fur Mie, I'm Knott
ID #1032682 entered on May 21, 2022 at 8:21am

#70. The First Scam is the Hardest
ID #1032663 entered on May 21, 2022 at 1:00am

#69. Who Am I...Really?
ID #1032623 entered on May 20, 2022 at 7:04am

#68. The Conundrum of my Choices
ID #1032612 entered on May 19, 2022 at 11:27pm

#67. Hurts So Good
ID #1032557 entered on May 18, 2022 at 5:25am

#66. I Love This Feeling
ID #1032523 entered on May 17, 2022 at 6:57am

#65. I'm Back Baby
ID #1032520 entered on May 17, 2022 at 3:50am

#64. Three Months...Idiot or Genius?
ID #1032430 entered on May 15, 2022 at 7:38am

#63. The Shame I Feel
ID #1032343 entered on May 13, 2022 at 3:46am

#62. Lost
ID #1026214 entered on February 7, 2022 at 4:13am

#61. One Day at a Time
ID #1024442 entered on January 10, 2022 at 5:36am

#60. Every Up has a Down
ID #1024074 entered on January 4, 2022 at 12:57am

#59. Thirty-One Days...But Who's Counting?
ID #1023832 entered on December 31, 2021 at 7:05pm

#58. A Question of Understanding
ID #1023607 entered on December 24, 2021 at 9:11am

#57. It's Both the Journey AND the Destination
ID #1023539 entered on December 22, 2021 at 6:07am

#56. The Snowball Effect
ID #1023293 entered on December 16, 2021 at 10:51pm

#55. How to Avoid Becoming Roadkill...A Cyclists Guide
ID #1023098 entered on December 12, 2021 at 6:52am

#54. Fear...Friend or Foe?
ID #1022995 entered on December 9, 2021 at 9:49am

#53. Sweet Sixteen
ID #1022912 entered on December 7, 2021 at 8:28am

#52. Progress Update
ID #1022615 entered on December 1, 2021 at 5:32am

#51. Pandemic 2.0
ID #1022446 entered on December 17, 2021 at 3:04am

#50. Thank You
ID #1022283 entered on November 25, 2021 at 5:47am

#49. A Survivor Requires Insight & the Courage To Ask for Help
ID #1022100 entered on November 22, 2021 at 5:12am

#48. It's Not Where You're From, It's Where You're Going Deadmau5
ID #1021930 entered on November 20, 2021 at 1:11am

#47. On Track and Not Looking Back
ID #1021850 entered on November 18, 2021 at 4:49am

#46. All Roads Lead to the Future...My Future
ID #1021516 entered on November 13, 2021 at 5:51am

#45. The Longest Night
ID #1021378 entered on November 11, 2021 at 5:12am

#44. Things to Remember Never to Forget
ID #1020416 entered on October 30, 2021 at 8:34am

#43. Just A Bad Day...I'll Get Over It.
ID #1020285 entered on October 28, 2021 at 5:23am

#42. The Land of Smiles
ID #1019934 entered on October 23, 2021 at 6:49am

#41. Metamorphosis in Real Time
ID #1019851 entered on October 22, 2021 at 9:21am

#40. Conflict Resolution
ID #1019652 entered on October 19, 2021 at 7:51am

#39. Flying High Now
ID #1019519 entered on October 17, 2021 at 8:06am

#38. Today, I Lived the Best Life Possible
ID #1019376 entered on October 15, 2021 at 6:44am

#37. Don't Fold.
ID #1019245 entered on October 13, 2021 at 4:42am

#36. Drug Dreams 0 Reality 1
ID #1019100 entered on October 10, 2021 at 11:26pm

#35. Today I Wondered
ID #1019002 entered on October 9, 2021 at 5:47am

#34. Meth Came a'Knocking
ID #1018930 entered on October 8, 2021 at 7:28am

#33. This Is Me Now and Into the Future
ID #1018876 entered on October 7, 2021 at 8:38am

#32. Humble Pie is an Acquired Taste But One I Could Get Used To.
ID #1018731 entered on October 6, 2021 at 8:47am

#31. I Can See Clearly Now the Rain has Gone...Jimmy Cliff.
ID #1018662 entered on October 4, 2021 at 6:18am

#30. It's Not the End...It's Only the Beginning
ID #1018580 entered on October 3, 2021 at 3:25am

#29. No Big Deal...Yeah, Right.
ID #1018503 entered on October 1, 2021 at 11:30pm

#28. Paying it Forward...For Real.
ID #1018456 entered on October 1, 2021 at 12:42am

#27. Celebrate Your Life
ID #1018384 entered on September 30, 2021 at 7:03am

#26. The Strange Phenomenon of the Growing Pants
ID #1018260 entered on September 29, 2021 at 6:36am

#25. RE: Here's to All the Anonymous Givers...A Confession
ID #1018207 entered on September 28, 2021 at 7:44am

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