Hello Seoul Ahmed - I'll reply in the language in which you wrote your story
Hmnn .. খুব খারাপ ভিগনেট নয় - এটি একটি ডায়েরির মতো পড়ে এবং টিভি হাহাহাহ স্ক্রিপ্ট হিসাবে আরও ভাল কাজ করতে পারে। আমেরিকান লেখার ওয়েবসাইটে আপনি যে বাঙালি লিখেন তা আকর্ষণীয় ... আপনি কি এখানে অন্য কোনও লোককে চেনেন যারা এই ভাষাটি বলেন? আপনি কি ইংরেজিতে লিখতে পারেন
Hello again, rose34 We meet again, and as you've requested a review from me for your new writing, I appear before you like a Grammar Genie
This is a very different story than the Maharaja! Not as dramatic perhapss, but I think Charlie's character is reasonably developed - but could be more so, with some more personal descriptions of him.. to show his personality, so a reader can become more invested in him and therefore, the story and where it's headed.
Here is an example of some grammatical issues:bold and cross outs are my suggestions
There was a small window beside his bed, the window was slightly open which lets the cool air in, torelieving himself from the hot weather. All seemed good but still, Charlie didn't know what was the reason was, behind his restlessness...
I have sent a copy to you, throught the WDC email system with a corrections word doc on the whole piece. Bye for now
Hi there D.G. Ship This is certainly a story with currency! And where I come from (The State of Victoria, Australia) this has an horrible sense of reality. - We're in our 2nd lockdown!
I liked and enjoyed the story's arc - the tension building as the story progressed.
I'm also glad that, after the excellent build up that there was a very satisfying ending.
Good Evening QueenNormaJeanGreeneggs&vegham Congratulations on winning at "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge" yesterday! There is generally a left of centre take on the prompts, I've noticed.. the stories are always good but the winner seems always to have been someone who thought outside the box!
A very good twist at the end, too!
Nicely paced with a well defined character in Joey
Good Evening, tin I will email you a word doc, internally through WDC with some grammar and paragraphing suggestions. I thought that the piece was quite well written overall, however words like and or but should not start a sentence, on the whole. I've written a bit more about that in the word doc I'm about to send you. Cheers!
Well, Travellinda You surely know how to get into a pickle! "You're a better wo-man than I am, Gunga Din" (from the poem by Rudyard Kipling) ... in this case, more intrepid! I always go to a hairdresser
That was an entertaining read! I felt my heart start to beat faster as you described the following:
My hair was the color of Catalina salad dressing—bright orange with just a hint of pink!
I wish you had an accompanying photo! I really do Thankyou, you are an accomplished story teller and Welcome to WDC, by the way!
Good Evening 🌕 HuntersMoon I loved that story! It also resonated because I have a son by that name, who calls me Mama...
This story is a fabulous short' but I can really see that it could be developed, do you have any plans to do that? A really lovely - if sad- contemporary story - good for both adult and children to read, I think!
I'm not sure whether this is a mistake
Ben ran to her and crawled into her lap, his orange forgotten in [the?...] melee.
Good Evening Koyel~writing again, I found your poem on the Reviewers Page and every now and then I will read - and enjoy - a little change from stories.
These 2 lines seemed to me, to need a contrast, rather than an 'alike' comparison...I would have thought that
... Unlike the robust sun it is never proud
Humbly wraps the sky in its serene shroud
Like the robust sun it is never proud,
Humbly wraps the sky in its serene shroud.
I respectfully suggest these slight changes, below:
The [upper] First Class train car was filled with chatter
Men solemly discussed about land and money while women chatted heartily about fasion and magazines.
I really do think your main character is interesting! ... self contained and happiest in his own company - but anxiety ridden and not comfortable at all when associating with others'. I hope you develop this character into a full story - I would also like to know what has made him that way.
You have a really engaging wriiting style, and I look forward to seeing more!
Hello Oddman WoW! It is a long time since I had the good fortune to come across a very succinct philosophy!
"Spend your thoughts for real living"
... I had to award this piece a 5 because it is so apt and especially in these times...
The accompanying photo is excellent and compliments your words so well.
Hello Everest M. Tetamo I think that the story has potential but I thought that, as the main protagonist was supposed to be unassuming and be not particularly noticable, her actions with the other girls would very quickly make her a target. So just some inconsistencies.. perhaps rethink the way she is going to be present - her persona .. is it going to be more subtle or is she really an 'out there' girl?
Everyone sought after the lead role in Terramore high's High's - (as it's the name of a place- a noun).
She was a stunning girl, with ebony hair [that] reached down to her ankles
I enjoyed the challenges that this story presented to me as a reviewer and if you want more feedback and direction with the story, I am most happy and ready to help
Hello Odessa Molinari - that's the shortest story I've read for a while from the "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge" - at a 112 words! It's perfect and a great achievement to get the surprise twist in, with so few words - (Much clapping and cheering from the crowd
Was this a true story of this artist? I could believe that it is some kind of anecdote...
8 Lines to tell a complete story - I am sure that you are a master at this, aren't you?
Bonjour Pepper My heart was in my mouth, as they say! I read Anne Frank's diary a couple of times as a young girl and similar stories and documentaries continue to fascinate me, as well as others'. I've also had ideas to write a story, myself on the topic, which never ceases to be moving.
Your short, flash fiction was intense and provided all the ingredients of a good story and a satisfying end. I breathed a sigh of relief, when Shmidt persuaded the guard'...
There were no errors or issues with the story and I enjoyed reading it. Congratulations on your win at "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge" on 29th of August 2019!!!
Hello jubshaw How wonderful to see a grandchild get to graduation and for you, to be part of his life's journey. It rhymes ~ and clearly displays your love and pride in your eldest grandchild. He has provided you with the rewards of joint family efforts and you are hopefully providing continuining mentorship and guidance. Thankyou for sharing and I hope he has a copy!
Typo Alert
But someday we hope we will still be here
Whenever you're faced with hard choices, my dear.
Your Haiku - "Mother" - is a technically perfect haiku with 17 syllables and a 5:7:5 / 3 line poem. I researched the question: what makes a haiku great - and found this piece of wisdom.
Haikus focus on a brief moment in time, juxtaposing two images, and creating a sudden sense of enlightenment.
Matsuo Basho (1644-1694) made about 1000 haiku poems through the lifetime, traveling around Japan. His writing “The Narrow Road to the Deep North ” is the most famous haiku collection in Japan
Your own haiku was a simple and elegant tribute which any reader with a wonderful mother could relate to and I think that anyone receiving your written salutation would feel proud and happy.
Hello SandraLynn Team Florent! I found your story in the "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge" - always a source of great stories for me to review I was immediately empathetic to your story of hiding in the bathroom to eat something in peace. I once took a boiled egg and toast into the bathroom to eat in peace, from the two, round-eyed infants I had.
I love these flash fiction vignettes ~ yours' sounded like a true story though...
No typos or grammar issues and the story arc was entertaining all the way to the end
"Noticing Newbies" Has been a feature of WDC for many years, and it provides a great function - and opportunity for both new writers and members, as well as for reviewers to sharpen their skills and experience.
As a writer I have never experienced such a great site with as many options and that includes the writing group in my own locality, that I belong to.
Writing.Com - such a simple and easy website to remember and yet, so much to explore and become involved with - it is truly an alternative universe! I cannot keep away from it and enjoy all my time on WDC.
Good Evening, once again, DurkaDoink Well! So you can tell a good tale!
Here, in 517 words you had me going, Mate! Monster! Indeed! What bass-ass is going to hurt this little boy! I'm in kill mode.. and then... well let this teaser be an incentive for other reviewers to go see!
A really entertaining Halloween story - and I Love Halloween!
There were a couple of little typos or grammar thingy's but nothing that detracted from the story and the great twist in the tale!
Good Day, Beholden - I did like your nicely crafted story, submitted to the competition "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge" In just 297 words you've created quite a mysterious story with the prisoner being an 'enemy shaman - a rainmaker' who's fate does not prevent him from bestowing his last 'gift'.
I also loved the accompanying picture, something that I've noticed you tend to do with all items in your port' - as do I.
Hi there Sumojo - I see the Australian icon, the kangaroo in your handle... does that make you an Aussie in NYC? Congratulations ! on Winning on 31st May in the "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge" too!
Your story had the ring of truth to it, and appeared to be anecdotal in style. I've visited NYC in 2009 and loved it, myself. I would envy anyone who could afford to live and work there!
There was a good use of prompts in your story of 299 word (for a 300 word limit) and I didn't see any errors of grammar or punctuation.
My only criticism is that more regularity of spacing on the page might improve the overall appearance of your piece but the story itself was very engaging and I was able to picture the whole scenario! Kudo's to you for good writing
Seeing him here surprised me, for I would have bet money on him being dead by now.
...I look a lot different now. Twenty years in prison changes a man both inside and out.
Some people have the knack for short fiction - a complete story arc in a flash! But I see the same people on a regular basis providing wonderful stories in the daily flash fiction forum, if that's the right term - and I am in awe of those' who can turn out perfect gems in a 24/24 hr turnaround!
Good Day f.x.keenan I know what you mean, here, when you said:
I ... have written as much since the covid outbreak as I had in my 57 years previous.
... for me, it's also reviewing - I've had plenty of time too!
In 246 words - for a contest: "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge" which has a 300 word limit - you've done an amazing job. Someone from here at WDC has said that it's hard to get a complete story within the word limit, into these kinds of contests, but I believe some people make it an art-form.
Is the subject too hot to handle? No - in-fact, he'll be as cool as a cucumber - in no-time at all! ... I was thinking that the signage must have been neon and quite dazzling - such is your ability to conjure with your words. All very enjoyable!
Well, Well, Well willwilcox Master Wordsmith! You can pack descriptions into your 55 words like a specialist chocolatier can spin a morsal of sugar and cocoa into each constant, delicious mouthful'.
Raising her bulky abdomen from the husk of her previous lover, she waved it at the newcomer and waited.
I am reminded of the Eponymous Title of the Album: Welcome To My Nightmare (by Rocker, Alice Cooper) Narrated by Vincent Price.
...And here, my prize, the Black
Widow. Isn't she lovely?.. and so deadly. Her kiss is
fifteen times as poisonous as that of the rattlesnake...
But I really like your outcome better ! What that suitor does!
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This is a very different story than the Maharaja! Not as dramatic perhapss, but I think Charlie's character is reasonably developed - but could be more so, with some more personal descriptions of him.. to show his personality, so a reader can become more invested in him and therefore, the story and where it's headed.
I liked and enjoyed the story's arc - the tension building as the story progressed.
A very good twist at the end, too! 
That was an entertaining read! I felt my heart start to beat faster as you described the following:
This story is a fabulous short' but I can really see that it could be developed, do you have any plans to do that? A really lovely - if sad- contemporary story - good for both adult and children to read, I think! 
Ben ran to her and crawled into her lap, his orange forgotten in [the?...] melee.
These 2 lines seemed to me, to need a contrast, rather than an 'alike' comparison...I would have thought that 
"Spend your thoughts for real living"
Your short, flash fiction was intense and provided all the ingredients of a good story and a satisfying end. I breathed a sigh of relief, when Shmidt persuaded the guard'...
Your Haiku - "
I love these flash fiction vignettes ~ yours' sounded like a true story though...
As a writer I have never experienced such a great site with as many options and that includes the writing group in my own locality, that I belong to. 
A really entertaining Halloween story - and I Love Halloween!
I also loved the accompanying picture, something that I've noticed you tend to do with all items in your port' - as do I. 
Your story had the ring of truth to it, and appeared to be anecdotal in style. I've visited NYC in 2009 and loved it, myself. I would envy anyone who could afford to live and work there!
Seeing him here surprised me, for I would have bet money on him being dead by now.
In 246 words - for a contest: "
Raising her bulky abdomen from the husk of her previous lover, she waved it at the newcomer and waited.