A nice flow of plot in this chapter. The friendship between kylie and zell is decribed in a very different way which makes for an interesting read. The innovative way in which you write and unfold the plot is very refreshingly good. It captures the interest of the readers. well done again.
The action sequence in this chapter is very well written. It triggers the imagination and the readers can actually visualise the scene easily. The teenager has been described well with all the dilemmas of teen age but handled with maturity and clarity of thoughts. The descriptions are vivid. Well done.
Very detailed and meticulously described experience of child-birth. It reminded me of an article I once read in Reader's Digest long time ago about a pre-mature baby. Well you must be very proud of your sons and in love with your wofe, to dedicate a piece like this to them.Interesting read nevertheless, sharing the experience of a would-be parents, and the pain and anxiety of a child being born. Well done.
Inspiration from wild turkey!! thats a great poem. truely well presented. Enjoyed reading the poem. The flow is good and there is a lot to learn from the behaviour of the birds. The concept of "inner eyes" and "fluffing" is very innovative. It reaches out to the readers in an unusual way. Well done keep writing.
All the poems are equally good. The style is well formed and the subjects well chosen. The presentation is very crisp and direct talking to the readers staright forward without any unnecesary frills. Very well done. Keep writing. The way you look at thing is very refreshing and innovative. Keep it up.
A very acute observation of the people in general where we are just playing the parts alloted to us without any feeling or reverance. We are just putting up a show of faith but the ignorance never leaves us. We might be colorful outside but the darkness inside us is never removed. Well done, keep writing.
Another of your truthful confession. Yes this acts of faith are all fruitless, they never have helped anyone. These things are futile to believe in. But poeple still do this as a gesture of faith when the life pulls you down. Life has never made it easy for anyone. And we have to fight our own battles. Well done again.
A short but very well written poem. "If it can prevail then flamboyance deserves to be there"- who could have thought of such a logic? a refreshing poem well presented. The style is crisp and straught forward, without the usual frills. The charcterstic honest is there and it makes a wonderful life lesson. Thank you.
The way you tell deal with the topics is really wonderful. There is a harshness and truthfulness in the way you present your thoughts. "evicting my passion" what a wonderful use of words. The depth in the meaning really touches the readers and makes it a worth reading. Very well done indeed.
Another wonderful creation. The thoughts about the different subjects all woven within one poem is very well done. The new and refreshing way of looking at things is your greatest gift. The phoenix depicted like a dragon, and the nostalgia that is not the soothing old feeling when lonliness surrounds one. Well done.
Well written, the contrast well depicted. The descriptions vivid and triggers the imagination of the readers. The rhyming is different but it works for the poem which flows smoothly. "Laced gloom to carpets" is a very well use of words. Thoughtful and innovative style of writing that actually is very interesting.
Its a short poem but packed with a deep maningful message. The use of the mataphor of fingers to depict the different forms of governance is a wonderful concept which is refreshing and innovative. There is a ruthlessness about the way this poem is written which actually speaks out to the readers in a voice of revolt. Well done.
HAHAHAHA thats a good one. Those who cant wake up in the morning know the agony of having to get up after resisting the urge of sleeping five more minutes. Thats an eternal struggle for some people. Defense alone doesnot win the war- very well said, only defending onself cannot make you win, you have to get up and face the enemy at full assault to win. Quilted scabbard, I never imagine someone can think in this way. Its refreshingly unique. Ver well done, keep writing.
It the first time I have read a single word each line poetry!! and you did a good job. The emotions come out well with the choice of the words. Keep writing.
Such a poignant piece that reminds me of the framed photographs that my grandfather had collected. The description of the dawn turning into morning and the early morning fog is very vivid and picturesque. A very good way to describe the young boys getting older and becoming the father and grandfather themselves and becoming successful in their lives. The way the young boy first makes a misshapen frame and later changes it to a better one. And how the old man is left alone and cannot venture into the things he used to do. But they create a world of memory and live in it. Such is life. Very well done. Keep writing.
One of my friends once gifted me a black spider, the ones which kills the male of the species. Your story if very well formed, quite imaginative and well presented. The twist in the story is nicely brought. the descriptions are vivid anf the characters well imagined. The brutality of death has a feel of reality. A good horror story all in all.
Very well done. The metaphor is brilliantly used. The flow is good and the way of writing makes is a worth reading. The way you perceive your life is sad but unique.The pain is palpable and so is the sadness. Life's endless sights- such an honest way to describe life. There are too much of it going by when we look at it with the pain which we are feeling.Keep writing.
Hope this helps-A great subject and well presented. You have taken up a theme that depicts the bonding between the father and his daughter. There is such a poignant feel to the story. I only hope that it could be done in the real life. So many times the parents are willing to take away the pain and trouble of the children but they are helpless. In this story the father took away the pain and death that his daughter had faced. Such an emotional story. The dialogues are good and keeps the readers hooked to the story till the end. The descriptions are very vivid and creates an image in the mind of the reader. The twists in the story are good and interesting. Very well done indeed, keep writing.
Honestly this is one of the most innovative stories in the interactive section!! And I dont think I need to reinterate how great and exciting it is after reading the statistics that you have given in the introduction. The craziness and the freedom to take it any way the reader likes is the best part. I have started an interactive too, but haven't got a single entry.. so I know how hard it is to get people to contribute, but with so many chapters to you interactive, it just proves you are too good.
Best of luck, and I'll surely add to one of these chapters!!!
Just so wonderful !! such a romantic beautiful poem. You sure do paint a rosy picture with words, that can actually warm the readers heart. Rain can be wet on my lips!! what a beautiful creation. Your creativity os unique and your talent is quite obvious. Do write more, each is better than the other. Truely gifted poet.
A beautiful romantic poem. It truely has an old world charm to it. I enjoyed reading it a lot. The similies and metaphors work well and the romance woven between the lines makes it a wonderful read. The dream like quality invokes romance in even the unromantic.. well done. Keep up the good work.
Wonderful!! it leaves the reader the speechless. Too many thing are told in the words that are left unsaid. But the opposing emotions of trauma and the revolt that is felt by the girl is very vividly described. It is a wonderful read.
"Everyone pity me" is better I think. The sorrow and waiting of a girl for her lover to come is a subject for many poems, and you have done a good job at it. There is a feeling of lonliness and rejection that the girl feels which the readers can relate to easily. But the positive note of the poem in the end makes it a good poem. Keep writing and keep improving.
This is a better written poem. The rhyming works fine for it. There are unspoken words and emotions that are conversed between a husband and a wife who know each other. There is a compassion and connection that is well portrayed and the readers feel the warmth in the relationship and bonding that in shared between the spouses.Well done. Do keep this in your portfolio.
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so I know how hard it is to get people to contribute, but with so many chapters to you interactive, it just proves you are too good.
well done. Keep up the good work.