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76
76
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Purple Princess

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Never Goin Back Again

First Impression: Fleetwood Mac did some amazing songs, and this is one I enjoyed. I like the poem as a poem but I'm not seeing a redacted format. Portions of the original text are kept, while other parts are drawn over or crossed out.

What needs your attention: A bit of tweaking will get this as needed. I showed you what your entry should look like.

She broke down and let me in
Made me see where I've been
Been down one time
Been down two time
I'm never going back again
You don't know what it means to win
Come down and see me again
Been down one time
Been down two time
Mmm
I'm never going back again"

What part I liked best: I loved the song choice. Welcome to Redacted poetry, it's a challenge in itself

Overall impression: You're a team player, Theresa and we're honored your on our time. But in all honesty, this poem needs some attention. Please don't kills the messenger, it's said with good intentions.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? It's a frustrating day in the Games *Headbang*
created by Gervic


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77
77
Review of The Train  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones"  "The Iron Bank of Braavos" 

A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Sorji

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: The Train

First Impression: What a great metaphor about how oblivious humans can be in their daily actions. We're so tunnel-visioned on our needs we don't see the path of destruction we've created. Good use of the villanelle's style to tell the story.

What needs your attention: I can't think of anything I would change other than the category of supernatural. I'm not sure your poem fits there. I would choose adult, or experiences.

What part I liked best: Ignorance and avoidance spilled forth stanza is really powerful. It encourages self-reflection. It also reminds the reader that the author sees it all.
I also thought the desolate tracks reminds us that we may feel alone but in reality the carnage of our actions will be there too.

Overall impression: The pacing of your poem was like the train as well charging ahead making the reader feel the momentum as well as see the damage humans create everyday without a thought of the recourse. Good word choices to drive in the message.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? There's a lot of poetry contests here on WDC. I think you should enter your work and get it noticed more.
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78
78
Review of R.S.V.P.  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Bear

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: RSVP

First Impression: Congratulations on being published. There's nothing like that feeling of validation. I love the feeling of progression this poem offers as the narrator shares moments in time. Is some one listening. Like the narrator I'm not always sure either. Are my reactions because of another's silence.

What needs your attention: Not a thing. This poem conveys a solid story in its free style form.

What part I liked best: The last stanza for me has the most powerful imagery a life filled with treasures that can be savored once again because they were never sent.

I took a class in college about healing one's self. The professor suggested writing letters to the different people we crossed paths with in our lives, not just the ones that hurt us but also the ones who brought us joy. Put them in an envelope and set them inside a box to opened in ten years for introspection. I was surprised at the things that upset me then no longer mattered. Some of the things I found joy with I had moved on as well. It's a great healing tool that I was reminded of reading your poem today.

Overall impression: Five stanzas of thought provoking imagery that invites the reader to consider what really matters in the end.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say?????
created by Gervic


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
79
79
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones"  "The Iron Bank of Braavos" 

A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Maryann

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: My Mother the Star

First Impression: When I was reading and got to the word technology and immediately it stuck out to me. Why would that word be used in 1920. I went and looked up the word to discover that I was wrong, the word has been around a lot longer than I ever knew. Wow, you can teach old people new things.

My Gram used to talk about listening to Al Jolson and Duke Wellington on the radio so those names were familiar to me.

What needs your attention: I didn't note any spag issues.

What part I liked best: I loved how the mom handled the science teacher. She was a force to be reckoned with for sure. I remember going to school with my middle son, the one I mentioned on Monyt's newsfeed promotion. He has always written very small which served him well in the Navy but not so much with his English teacher. She wanted him to write larger and he would start off big but it would go back to his normal size. So I asked if he could submit typed papers instead and she said no, only hand-written papers. I was furious that she was so rigid. So I would hand-write every one of my son's papers and then he would turn them in. It ended up to his benefit becasue I corrected it as I wrote. For the life I couldn't understand why it mattered between typed and handwritten so long as the child did the work.

Like your character in the story, her grade was never about her work.

Overall impression: It was fun glimpse into the past. The pacing was good and the details tied together nicely.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say?????
created by Gervic


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
80
80
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Maryann,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Welcome Back, Kotter

First Impression: Oh my goodness, I used to watch that show back in 1975 maybe 76. Gabe Kaplan played Kotter. The show was hilarious. I think the actor would get a kick out of your piece about naming a drink after your family. Mine would be Too Touchy, feely in the Sand or maybe Manhattan Runaway.
I wish I could say this is unusual student behavior but it's not. It takes a lot energy for teachers to keep children focused.

What needs your attention: No spag issues {spelling, punctuation and grammar) It's all Joey's fault for coming up for the abbreviation.

What part I liked best: Kotter trying to get the kids involved by giving them examples for the head of the family. I would go with Groper Man for my father. He thought he could grope any woman because he was a man. Yeah, I knwo he's a sleezeball. Even sleezeball works for a drink name. Kotter's comment about Sleepy Zombies was funny.

Overall impression: I hadn't thought about this shoow in years. Thank you for the stroll down memory lane. They've done a lot of old programs returns, I'm going to look and see if this was one of them.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Always, a pleasure.
created by Gervic


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
81
81
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones"  "The Iron Bank of Braavos" 

A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Jeff, blame it on Gaby for all the visits.

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Clandestine Services

First Impression: Initially I thought they're committing a crime because of the time noted after the building was empty of the janitorial staff. Although at the end I did wonder why they didn't enlist the janitorial staff's help. I guess the less conspirators involved the better to keep it a secret.

What needs your attention: No spag issues. I did want to thank you for your consistent use of larger font sizes in the things I did read in your port. 20/20 eye sight passed me by years ago.

What part I liked best: All the party decorations to make for a special birthday party for the company's ceo. I think it says a lot about the individuals that work for the ceo as well. It's more than just a boss and employee existence for them to go to the lengths they did to have everything in place.

Overall impression: A fun and quick read for the daily flash fiction contest. Two words to spare on the word count and the story felt complete, Nicely done. I think the pacing was good and the characters felt realistic.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say?????
Image #2315526 over display limit. -?-


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82
82
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Jeff, yup scoping out the competition

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Scrivenings of the King-Beyond the Wall

First Impression: You've written a lot for the Game of Thrones thus far. I think you might be in this to win. I read a few of your pieces and I'm hoping you draw them out further as static items. Fantasies and Fairytales number five I think wants to go longer than what is written. Stolen artifacts number five also feels like the story has just begun.

What needs your attention: I see nothing. Like Joey says no spag issues.

What part I liked best: New Orleans number one. That poem says so much more than the thirteen well chosen words. It reminded me of my best cheerleader with my writing was grandson. He died in a dirt bike accident in 2019 at the tender age of 13. But before his passing, he was asking about poems I had written about Halloween. He always wanted more. He's on the other side and I'm here, trying to honor him. He would have liked your mirror mirror prompt 2 a lot.

Overall impression: The author has been very productive in the Game of Thrones.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? I'm not ready to bow, yet.
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83
83
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Gervic

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Poetry Review Garden (on hiatus)

First Impression: Wow, there's a lot of information on the forum to take in. The graphics are awesome but you already know I think you're amazingly talented. I noted some of the authors involved and saw some familiar names. *Smile*

What needs your attention: I didn't see anything punctuation or grammar wise but I will say the long list of invalid items is distracting among all the other beautiful graphics.

What part I liked best: I like that you've listed some really good poetry contests. Two of my favorites are Dark Dreamscapes and Shadows and LIght Poetry Contest. I was so sad when Dark Dreamscapes closed. I hope Darlene returns soon.

Overall impression: The incentive option is interesting, not many forums have that available to keep activity from becoming stagnant. I was sad to see the forum hasn't been updated since 2022. We can't blame Gaby ~ Finding my way back for that, can we.

I believe this forum offers a lot of good reviewing opportunities and would serve the WDC community well if it was open again.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say?????
Image #2315526 over display limit. -?-
84
84
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones"  "The Iron Bank of Braavos" 

A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Joy

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Poet's Practice Pad

First Impression: This is wicked cool, how did I miss this addition in your port. I thought I had snooped a lot already but I guess I wasn't thorough enough. Poems with prompts is something you and I share in common. I love conquering the challenge of the prompt within a poem structure.

What needs your attention: The explanations are good so I wouldn't change a thing. Going to steal Joey's phrase no SPAG issues.

What part I liked best: The variety in prompts is awesome. You should use some of them for prompts in Blog City as well. I really Images in the Dark and the animal one {Poe's raven) both sound really interesting to me.

I also noted the list of other poetry forums. Thank you for mentioning Love Shouldn't Hurt. I need to open that, it's been awhile actually since Johnny died. I'm finally in a place where I am triggered less.

Overall impression: This is the perfect place to challenge ourselves in poetry and get our work out there in the poetry forums. I see a couple I didn't know were out there. Thanks!

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say?????
Image #2315526 over display limit. -?-
85
85
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones"  "The Iron Bank of Braavos" 

A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Webbie,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Survival of Cultural Childhood Conflict

First Impression: Yup, I had to look it up. Spero che tu soffochi" I'm going to remember that gem the next time I argue with hubby. I never thought myself blessed as a child, but this is definitely something I'm glad I missed. I only had one year of school with a nun because there was a shortage of teachers so she covered my third grade year. My only memories of that year are of putting my hands on the desk and her whacking my butt with a paddle. Did your school have the same hit the child to educate them?

What needs your attention: Looks good.

What part I liked best: Italian grandma the flower of Italy adding her two cents to the picture which should have been between your parents. Did your French Meme have something to add to the conversation about your schooling.

Overall impression: Multi-cultural war summs it very well. It's just the opposite now, children with multi-language skills have more opportunities in life. I enjoyed the family dynamics. I wish my grandmother I taught us Irish. But I am thankful to have missed the religious part.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? review 10 of 10... Door 13 complete.
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86
86
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Webbie

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Hey, Come Back With My Kid

First Impression: I bet the retelling of that story was the highlight of many a family gathering. I chuckled reading and was reminded of my own children's moments of fame in family conversations.

What needs your attention: Nothing, you're definitely an awesome writer. I hope someday someone says that about my work. We all dreams, don't we?

What part I liked best: The family going to the cable-car office to aid the father in his pursuit of the car with his pre-teen daughter on board. The screaming man on the brink of an aneurysm running behind their car was hilarious. I could envision that in my head as I read it. I actually re-read that paragraph to my husband because he was wondering why I was laughing. I know in the moment it was funny but after the fact it definitely is.


Overall impression: Another fun read about a family excursion that had a mishap that would later become a highlight of strolling down memory lane. The pacing was good and the caharacters were realistic especially the panic-stricken Dad. Kudos for another awesome writing piece.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? 9 of 10
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87
87
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blogging Circle of Friends  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Webbie,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

First Impression: I've done the sojourn more than once to clean my mother's home. It was exhausting and my children were far from amused with hauling all the crap off to good will and the dump only to return six months later to see she had accumulated even more. The woman had a lawn sale addiction.

Yes, I agree good deeds do get punished and then some.

What needs your attention: Nothing needs changing. But I will mention my pet peeve, you're killing me with the font size. I know, go away!

What part I liked best: Swimming in the pool sounded awesome but I knew after a hard day at cleaning that wasn't happening. Your poor son had to deal with four sisters, too. He's an angel!
I hate they put the water valves behind the washing machine, our overflowed and I had to pull the washer out to shut it off while worrying I was going to get electrocuted.

Overall impression: Another interesting glimpse in Webbie's world. The story flows smoothly. I felt tired and I didn't any of the cleaning at Grandma's Nicely done, Webbie.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? review 8 of 10
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88
88
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Webbie, wasn't it so sweet of Gaby to inflict your port with all these reviews.

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Taking Your Parting Gifts on the Way Out.

First Impression: I didn't realize you had four daughters. I knew you had children but mentally didn't process daughters. I thought raising one was difficult enough, I can't image four of them. I chuckled at the well planned departing gifts for birthday and Christmas.

What needs your attention: I didn't see anything punctuation or grammar wise but then you know I don't usually look either. I'm here for the read.

What part I liked best: I love the I'll show them mentality as each departed home. Little did they know that was the bigger plan.

I made my children pay 25.00 a week after high school for room and board until they moved out. We gave it back to them and added some to it to cover their rent deposits. And I made darn sure they emptied their rooms. I was so over hard rock posters and black lights.

Overall impression: This reader found this an amusing read about the bigger plan with the author's four daughters. Good job, Webbie.
Being a grandma makes it all worth it.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Review 7 of 10
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89
89
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Webbie,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: One Long Day in Chicago

First Impression: The footnote at the end was perfect, I know the location and the year the story is happening. Lou and Gloria again hot on the heels of a murderer to get Gloria's hard on his luck brother. I had younger siblings and I was always bailing them out for one thing or another.

What needs your attention: Thank you, doll for the larger font and better use of white space. I didn't notice any grammar or punctuation issues. Kudos.

What part I liked best: Lou's falling for Gloria, ahhh. That didn't take long for that old softie. I thought it was a nice touch with us learning the rest of the story by his conversation with Gary on what not to telll Gloria.

Overall impression: Webbie has a collection of detective stories that appear to be in the 30's with the protagonist Lou Ryan and his secretary Gloria who appears to be a crime magnet. This story introduced to Gary, Gloria's brother and some of Lou's low life connections and a murder that Gary was arrested for but didn't commit. His sister believed he was innocent and he was.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? 6 of 10 I don't think I'll get all 10 done tonight. I'm exhausted.
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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
90
90
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones"  "The Iron Bank of Braavos" 

A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Webbie, yup I'm back again.

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: No appointment Necessary

First Impression: Apparently, I don't read enough detective stories because I had no idea what gams was until I reached the part where Lou was lying on the floor checking out Gloria's legs.

What needs your attention: There's a lot of white space at the end, is there more coming to see this piece? This reader wishes there had been something that put us in the setting so we had visual reference to put us in the right mindse,
My only complaint is the font size, us old folks don't have 20-20 vision anymore. I had to expand my screen to read your detective story.

What part I liked best: Gloria distracting the clerk to help her boss get to the judge. Men seldom have plans, let alone a back up plan so Gloria made it happen.
I wish I could say the judge being on the take was unlikey but I can't. Our legal system is a joke.
IN the story Lou and Gloria worked well together as a team.

Overall impression: The dialogue felt natural and the character's actions were believable. The pacing of the story was good. Nicely done.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? 5 of 10
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91
91
Review of Totem Wolf  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones"  "The Iron Bank of Braavos" 

A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Webbie

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Totem Wolf

First Impression: The narrative poem gives the reader the opportunity to learn from the author about her spiritual journey. Did you also do shadow work during your self-discovery journey?

What needs your attention: Narrative poem or as some others call prose poem tells a story *Check* Nothing needs changing.

What part I liked best: I enjoyed the whole poem but I was drawn particularly to the part about being shown another way existed and that the narrator hadn't reached their true potential. My husband is always telling me I haven't fulfilled my potential yet... he believes I was meant to do more. I don't see what he sees but I do appreciate being loved and believed in. Maybe like the narrator I let time dwindle as well because I got lost along the way.

Overall impression: A nicely woven spiritual journey, Webbie. Spiritual discovery and then learning all we can about ourselves and our spirit guide to make wiser decisions for the future is something everyone should do.
I felt the flow was good and the word choices work.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? 4 of 10 Did you know you're lucky door 13...
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92
92
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
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Hi Webbie

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Instincts of mY Inner Animal

First Impression: I can see you as a wolf but my spirit animal to me is questionable. Mine is a moose. Don't laugh. Moose supposedly symbolize courage, authority, power and self-confidence. Their awkwardness symbolizes they need to withdraw sometimes to focus on inner strengths whereas a wolf is often mistaken as aggressive when in fact they're clever, intelligent, loyal and protective of each other. It's an interesting way to discuss your spirit animal.

What needs your attention: I did note an unusual rhyming pattern that doesn't seem to follow typical abab or acac or adad forms.

What part I liked best: The forest is mine, I can see you staking out your space and making sure it stays that way. The story unfolded with glimpses of a wolf's existence and what's important for their survival. Nicely done.

Overall impression: This four stanza poem introduces the reader to not only the wolf but the concept that we all have spirit animals. There's no doubt in this reader's mind the author's spirit animal is the wolf. She loves and protects her herd fiercely and wisely.
I value her friendship very much. *Heart*

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


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93
93
Review of White Balloons  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blogging Circle of Friends  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Webbie

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: White Balloons

First Impression: My whole life I've found peace in cemetaries but that changed when my grandson died. It was a wake-up moment because I hadn't thought there were children inside cemetaries. Your poem reminds me that children die unexpectedly every day. I like the bold single line question that makes the reader pause and be in the moment.

What needs your attention: The free style narrative works for this reminder that children are dying too soon.

What part I liked best: The image of a loved one looking down on their loved ones trying to cope with the loss.
There are never the right words for the person to let go.

Overall impression: I don't know when it became popular to release balloons but for me it's littering because once the balloons break the pieces will end up somewheres. I'm in favor of creating a garden or contributing to a park project in their loved one's name would be more lasting.

That's neither or there. I'm reviewing a peom the author shared about an experience she witnessed and the thoughts that crossed her mind while observing. The poem brought us in to be witnesses as well for a child taken too soon.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


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94
94
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Webbie,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: I Don't See The Junco's, Anymore

First Impression: We share a common interest in bird-watching, who would have guessed. I love how the poem tells the junco's story for someone who may not know anything will appreciate them.

I don't see the slate-colored juncos I saw in Maine and in New Jersey. The Audobon Society says Nevada has gray-headed juncos but I haven't seen yet. I miss watching their antics. We used to have about 20 a day when we lived in New Jersey.

What needs your attention: This free style poem works, I don't think changes are necessary.

What part I liked best: In the fourth stanza about the juncos resting before having to search for food after a storm. I used to keep a bucket of seed that once I shoveled I would sprinkle fresh seed for them. The juncos would swarm the seed.

Overall impression: A beautiful tribute about juncos, a spunky little bird species that every reader will want to see in their yard. The free style verse works here very well. I agree with the author looking for them and then realizing how much you miss them. I've been lucky to see different species of birds but none of them are juncos.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


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95
95
Review of Chasm  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi KingsSideCastle

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Chasm

First Impression: This was scary reminder of what can happen when you hike alone. It's important to let someone know where you're going to be, even if it's a note inside your car on the dash. Rangers do check those things.
I didn't hike very often but I did manage to get myself turned around and needed help getting myself back out In Acadia National Park. I had left a note on the rangers bulletin board noting what trail I was taking.

What needs your attention: I didn't notice any grammar or punctuation errors. Kudo.

What part I liked best: I thought Alexis reliving moments in her life would be something any one stranded would do. I chuckled when she got to her Mom. I've told my children the same thing life is hard, nothing comes easy and no matter the struggle it will be worth it.

Overall impression: The author gave a realistic reminder of the hazards of climbing alone. We as the reader had a first hand glimpse of her struggle once she fell into the sink hole and how she overcame the obstacles. The pacing is good. Alexis felt realistic.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


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96
96
Review of Game of Thrones  
for entry " Nobody" 
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Kristina

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Giovanni's Body

First Impression: Nicely woven story for the prompt 28 in the Game of Thrones. Giovanni's prompts appeal to me the most among all the offerings in the North Remembers. I hope you're enjoying the writing as much as me.
I'm so sorry about your husband Kristina. I remember when you used to blog anddiscussed your husband being in and out of the hosptial. I'm so glad you're back on WDC.

What needs your attention: I didn't notice any punctuation or grammar issues. Kudos.

What part I liked best: Old man Hawkins amused me when he remarked another parolee indicating there have been a few. His coming over to the table and asking if she saw him then explaining the little boy's background story. So sad.

c:borange}Overall impression: The author wove a tale about the first meal and inmate had after being released from prison. Those first interactions on the outside were nicely written. The comment between the guards about her being a nobody was great foreshadowing for the story ahead. I thought you did an excellent job placing us in the moment. The pacing was good and the characters felt believable.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Yellow case review # 9
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97
97
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Happy to Write

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: I have a different dream today

First Impression: Martin was an impressive man, father, public speaker and pastor. His beliefs were inspirational then and still apply today.

What needs your attention: "However, the struggle has changed some in the last %0 nor so years since" I believe you intended 50 or so years.

In the first paragraph the author states the dream is reasonable. Four sentences later repeats the dream is reasonable. It's redundant. The second time doesn't add to the discussion.
that children with limited abilities is a new sentence beginning That should be capitalized

What part I liked best: The author wants us to remember equality issues still exist for many. Martin opened the door partway but it's not fully opened yet. We have a responsibility to each other to make sure everyone is equal regardless.

Overall impression: The author should revisit this piece and organize the pargraphs to address one concern and then move onto the next paragraph with a separate concern. It will help organize the author's thoughts and make the message clearer and not simply a ramble. There's potential here, it just needs tweaking.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Yellow case # 4
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98
98
Review of Marriage  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Dorianne

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Marriage

First Impression: In the description the author wants the reader to know some marriages are easy. By the word choices, it is clear English is not your first language. No prejudice intended simply noting the stiffness of the poem.

What needs your attention: In the description, so people should be so many people make marriage look easy. There are some stanzas with sentences and others that aren't. Consistency helps. Like for the second stanza. The first two lines work well together. "Listen to what the other says
and keep cool. Avoid a heartless fight." Avoid a hearless fight is a declarative phrase not a sentence. I suggest changing it to this Listen to what the other says and keep cool to avoid a heartless fight. It matches the rest of the stanza and flows smoother.
In the third stanza any before close-mindedmess slows the pacing.
Treat in the fourth stanza doesn't feel right as it used. Simply moving the words around How you treat each.. will show a unified marriage.

What part I liked best: I sense the author believes in marriage and hopes that others do as well. The poem itself is a reminder in respect that couples should mutually show.

Overall impression: Marriage is a commitment that should not be taken lightly. Couples that have mutual respect for each other are the ones that make it look easy.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


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99
99
Review of Dismissed  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Sandra

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Dismissed

First Impression: I agree with Millicent the elderly are dismissed way too often. I know unfortunately first hand after witnessing an accident. The police asked the younger people standing there and walked by me totally ignoring me when I said, officer.

What needs your attention: Nothing other than a pet peeve of mine. I'm not a younger person so I find it challenging to read something that has minimal white space. It would me much easier on older readers if you added a space between paragraphs.

What part I liked best: I have a cat themed purse. That's hilarious. I guess, I'm living up to the old lady imagery. I'm hoping she has a good time with that wad of cash. I thought Officer Goodfellow's name was amusing. Sadly, all the officers behaved just like law enforcement we're accustomed to everyday. They don't listen, they just want everything to be just so and not really solve a crime. (Sorry, I've had some unfortunate mishaps with the police so I'm not fond of them.)

Overall impression: The pacing is good and the characters were believable. The story focused on the scene after the robbery and a good Samaritan who tried to do the right thing but was ignored. Bonus, she got a wad of money for her time.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


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100
100
Review of Garden Of Ideas  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blogging Circle of Friends  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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A Review from "The Iron Bank of Braavos" !


Hi Gaby, lady of surprises

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Garden of Ideas

First Impression: Guess I should have peeked in your port when I need a prompt for Blog City. Secrets out and when I overwhelmed, I will return. Writers can't keep drawing from the same well, they need inspiration too.

What needs your attention: I didn't see anything I would change. I'm surprised you haven't advertised it on the newsfeed.

This prompt did confuse me, or maybe I'm just GOT fogged.

What if you (your character) walked into a bookstore/library and see all the characters walking around. What do you do?

I get I'm the character but I see all the characters walking around. All the characters from what, the books or the book I'm also a character.

What part I liked best: The forum not only invites you to help others find inspiration but offers a place for you share your writing one of the prompts inspired. The requirements are clear and the forum is inviting. A chance at different merit badge is sweet too!

Overall impression: I added it to my favorites there's a merit badge that appeals to me so I need to review a couple of the stories shared. I didn't note any word count requirements but after game of thrones I'll be used to knocking out 1500 plus.

The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise. Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


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