Hi there,
This one's a very good story. I liked reading it. It'll teach the meaning of sharing with friends. You've chosen the words well, it'll not be difficult for children to comprehend. Dialogues occupy a major part of this story, which would encourage children to visualize the events.
Well written My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
Hi there,
I enjoyed reading your poem, and I agree with you. This poem badly needs some punctuation marks, and some of the lines can be rephrased. Overall, this is an encouraging poem for those who always think negatively. Life is worth living, so we must enjoy every moment of life.
Good attempt
Write on
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Hi there,
Well, to me this looks more like a prose than a poetry. It's really inspiring, I guess people who suffer from depression need to read this. It has a very friendly tone, and readers will enjoy reading it. The punctuation and spacing needs improvement, but overall, good job.
Write on!
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This is a really entertaining children's story. I like the little barking dog a lot, and I like it's determination. But I think you can erase the repetiton of the word "bark", as the reader already knows that this dog barks a lot. I believe children will really enjoy this. You could give a little description of barky. Well written. My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
This story is not bad. It looks like both a fantasy and a horror story to me. This can work as the first chapter of a longer story perhaps. And this requires more spacing between the lines. Cut your sentences short, to prevent monotony.
Good attempt My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
This is a nice interactive with lots of additions. I've made two additions, maybe I'll add more later. Thanks for buying tickets from my raffle, check the forum to see your ticket numbers "Invalid Item" . You may also check out:"Invalid Item"
Write on
Hi there,
Welcome to WDC. This is the way people behave when they fall in love for the first time. Change the numbers into words, cut the elipsis at the end, make your poem alligned at the center. Add some more lines to your poem. Overall, this was a good piece to read. My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
Hi there,
Welcome to WDC.
This is a sweet story, except for the fact that this girl Marli seems a bit stubborn. Dialogues dominate over this story, it looks more like a drama script. I guess you could cut down the dialogues and add a bit of description. The characters could be described more fully. Talk about the character's appearances and actions. My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
Hi there,
Welcome to WDC. Depression is part of anyone's life. It can attack anytime.But life is short and beautiful. So just have faith in God, as He's never unjust, and enjoy every moment of life. Count your blessings. Addiction will never help you. My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
I really liked this story. It looks like a letter to yourself or your loved one. I like the way you've talked about the various shades of colors to describe situations. It's a short piece that looks like a painted picture. I applaud your use of words, the story is very well laid out.
Write on! My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
This one's really amusing. Children, at times can understand what grown ups can't. I liked the way you've described your children's behavior. You've used very simple language, which is important to attract readers. The story is well laid out. I wonder what happened to the rabbit later? did you write another part of this story?
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This is a good poem about true love. You have used good adjectives, one or two imagery. Though this poem does not rhyme, it is well expressed. Love can touch just one time, and last for a lifetime, so one must know the value of love, and learn to appreciate it.
write on
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Hi there,
A teenager's mind is always active, and maybe they seem mysterious to many parents. But of course, sharing both knowledge and thoughts would be beneficial for both children and parents. I like the way you've shared your own experiences, you have seen a lot, and know that life can be both dark and bright, but we must appreciate both sides.
write on
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Well, maybe he could quit smoking even after being wounded. I like the way you've described the characters, in an amusing way. These men seem very careless about their health. Dialougues dominate in this story, and it looks like a little drama script.
Write on
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This is a really funny piece. This man is accused of some serious crimes, still he has the courage to write such a letter to his boss. I wish he'd express his opinion before being fired, his situation would have been easier then. Hope he's happy in Argentina!
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This is a good attempt at an acrostic. At first I thought you wrote it with your son's name, but I was wrong. Though the lines don't rhyme, each line describes his character very well. Maybe he doesn't show his affection for you, but he's still a part of your heart.
Write on! b}My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .{/b}
Hi there,
This is a good story that shows how strong true love can be. I guess it was a mixture of fantasy and reality. I'm glad the girl finally allowed the guy in her house. I like the use words here, you even showed the sound of the genie coming out, with poof! I appreciate the way this guy tried to persuade the girl, this is important for effective communication.
Write on
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This looks like the begining of a good story, but it requires content rating, proper punctuation, capitalization at points,and perhaps correction of a few typos. Overall, this will become a lot better if expanded, cause you have plenty of room for character development. Write on!
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I love your exquisite blend of love, nature and beauty. As I read, I could imagine the mermaid, and the seagulls. It seems like a long narrative story told in verse. You could make it a bit longer, with some more imagery. Well punctuated.
Hi there,
You are right, we are surrounded by so much hatred that we don't know the meaning of real love nowadays. I like this character a lot. She goes through plenty of hardships, but at the end she stood for herself, which requires real courage. Nice one, write on!
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I really needed a smile, and your story gave me one, thanks for that. Well, children might be small in size, but their small brains can be really worthy at times. I like your use of Indian terms here. How did you create the blue dotted lnes?
I enjoyed reading this little poem. But some lines rhyme, and some lines don't, which looks a bit odd to me. I like the way you have expressed your feelings in this poem. Increase spacing between the lines, and use more punctuation here. Well written.
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Hi there,
I was doing reviews for "let's review", so thought of reviewing you as well. I really liked this strong bond between grandfather and granddaughters. The only thing that made me sad was grandpa's death. Still, he is in the good hands of God.
Hi there,
Welcome to WDC. This is an interesting piece, but I think some improvement could be done: Neither the cold rain, nor the freezing wind
and Something he could never imagine exists in this world Cut the it do.
You could extend this a bit. Write on!
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This is a good article which would encourage people to count their blessings. I like the suggestions you gave at the end, and always try to be like that. The only thing that this article lacks, is a bit more spacing between the lines.
write on!
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