"Charming poem, SERENITY by Angel Love, copy-rite March 9. One runs with the children on the beach, contemplates surf, turf & horizon. Who can ask for anything more cheery, save sunshine in the dead of winter, watching for Spring? Like: "Indigo and lilac horizon." T. Teffom / Alabama Courier Times/ Creosote / March 13, 2K5
No suggestions. Sorry.
Cordially from Teff. Soon gone with the wind .... shall be ==
"From Request Reviews on Writing. Com arrives, the song title: MR. APOLOGETIC from song-writer, Djinn. Chuck full with a ken for anti-war theme, this artist compares war as fighting for Jesus. How mixed up, we see, the world become."
Alabama Courier News Times / Creosote / T. Teffom
Although the fiction newspaper, above, has no condolence or tolerance for the so-called religious right. Yes, it's out there, fundamentally speaking, Djinn.
Anyone may oppose the over-the-top righteousness, when genocide and war are the issues at stake. Anyday of the week.
Teff for one, hopes your song, takes off and soars into the hearts and minds of many readers, authors, guests. Perhaps, "parents" you mention in intro, will lighten up and embrace, this shared ken for protest, as is written in the First Ammendment, my dear. Hope so.
Hardly a day goes by in time and place and when we do not have the where-with-all to scope out another fine piece of poetry.
RATTLESNAKES AND MEN by T L Finch is such a poem. In the genre satire, I am afraid to misinterpret what the poem means in its exactness. Which spoils good reads anyway.
Love "twighlight of dawn under fading street lights."
The cemetary plot quest, the ref to the past ... all relevant. Thanks, Finch.
What a busy week of changes at WC. First we open all our Emails about new awadicons.
Rather giddy with happiness, I read all of this item by Story Mistress RE: Merit badges.
Just this week, Teffy got NO. 4 for REVIEWING. Then if that didn't make me ecstatic enough, for sometimes my reviews get wrinkled corners on the packaging when members try to dissect same. Sorry, almost lost the thread. Look what happens here. From Esprit, Public REV. Holy Hannah!
Story Mistress, thank you for all your good ideas and work making this website soar. Your essay item shows how we can all be elves in the night and be generous to each other. A very good thing.
THE BUNNY by Flip Go Yankees is entirely relevant to anyone, any age caressing the cherished Teddy. This I like for a story is told in a brief span of a poem. The reach for the rhymes come off smoothly. As a reader, I anticipated the take on The Bunny, honey. Thanks for this one.
Unsure, if I reviewed you before or not. Have a nice day, Flip, and by all means continue to Rhyme On!
There's 282 revs SENT since Oct from this author (me) and still I can recognize a twice read or my own words at fifty paces. Imagine.
Flip Go Yanks, I look forward to reading more of your items.
Cordially from Teff
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #937771 by Not Available.
Flip and all authors, poets ... Come join the free reviews for awards & fun promo above.
Beth Barnett Praises The Lord writes in her intro on Auto Reward, "I am looking down the road at a variety of options."
Then Beth solicits our help. Well, with the carrot cake's soaking rum raisins on the sidebar, I may not qualify but on a snowy day tell myself, what the hey.
Beth! Your Poll, DECISIONS, DECISIONS, WHAT TO WRITE? --- is sweetly irresistable.
Folder info available at Ms Beth Barnett's Portfolio. So get your Lamborghinis over to her house. Stat!
Brr rrr rhum. Try writing here, hon.
All welcome.
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #936894 by Not Available.
RONNIE HAS A CAT by Bob Simon, no only is a fun read, it allows for a great respect for the story teller. Bob Simon has done his job well, honed the craft to perfection.
In my book, where certain reviewers are lurking, but readers are wating ... Bob you have a chapter that is both catchy and satisfying.
Note on Superb Setting: To the table, Teff travels past "bankrupt farming towns." With paragraphs of the marvelous setting you place one in, this place setting beside the door of "Indian casinos" and vividly "along deep canyon cuts."
Teff the forlorn needed a road trip. And I got it here. When the Chapter is done, this spoiled reader wants to stomp her foot on the Arizona ground. Then I read the intro and know I can travel on for there is more out there. Simon tells us where to find his novel.
Imagine if you will, 3 fellers on a weekend excursion. Convo and one character's thoughts on the past. Wow, definite MUST MUST read on material here.
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #896696 by Not Available.
"SHINING ARMOR by Musetramp, an idyllic logo BTW, brings us a twist in the fate tale of dragon worship, many fantasy readers may honor as a first time original version. From stonekeep to stablemaster the knight departs, foiled once more, or foreverafter. Leaving readers in the lurch going ... why hasn't anyone ever thought of this one? Everlasting last laugh at the end, Musetramp. Click on this one authors, readers, guests. Hats off to this author of yore."
"SETTING PERFECT as a car moves west, "bouncing" along in DESTINATION HOME, a tell all essay by Bakergirl. From "red wing blackbirds" to "grizzly" across a "wooden bridge" on a "well trod dirt road" we are passengers with this author, with our eyes wide open. Must admit with this one, I am smitten at the intro and onboard for the ride. When arrival point takes US past "Mission Mountain Range of the Rockies" the journey is well worth it."
One objection: Baker Girl, GIVE us a state, so we can web search more info for this marvelous ... (from intro) "Return to Flathead Indian Reservation" where two parents await a lady who comes back to her ancestoral home.
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. # by Not Available.
"The Dreaded Eye-O-You by poet Lenny66 ... hold on, must scroll up, not very far ... are there two or three sixes in the poster's name? Uh-oh. Ahah ...
Restart review ... The Dreaded Eye-O-You by Lenny666, found on Auto Rewards is a brief .40 kb read, copy-rite last August.
Rhymes well
Says exasperation for friends who borrow $, noted in intro.
Good try? I think so. Well I too tried the poetry craft.
"For MOON OVER THE OCEAN by Anbhas Mac Fiach, this reviewer / fiction writer / poet is terribly afraid to write more words than the sonnet contains. For this is, readers, authors, poets, members, guests an eloquent piece. Comparisons of a broken heart coupled with the Ocean side's drifting, swaying beauty where many travel to think things thru, may startle readers of Moon Over The Ocean. Nice title BTW."
Thanx for this one.
Cordially, from Teff
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #938484 by Not Available.
DELUSIONS a poem by Very Sara attempts and does describe the bug of all bugs the infamous fever.
The poem lives up to genre biographical and personal. Of genre choice artistic, this reviewer remains skeptical there.
Like == "I have never known this paralysis" == with rhyme. Center of poem for syllables and catchy word paralysis, pivots stanzas with an accurate swing.
The Suggestions:
I like caps at beg of each line. Perhaps try those. If you like and it fits for YOU. Common acceptable format. Tells me in poetry that a new thought starts or a new thread.
Cute, kinda. Felt the fever sounds more serious, (my take) but clueless really.
"An elephant, Bamba roams "the plains of the Serengeti" in this great read by story-teller, author K S Reetz. Bamba wields controversial thoughts with an indignant claim for a new king of the jungle.
Enter Taco an elephant with a "sexy Spanish accent" and soon you have a near riot. For this hilarious tale. dear readers, authors, guests ... wait until you reach the brouhaha. After the elephants swim in imported moonshine.
Grand setting! Love quips and exagerations like "zero to sixty MPH" one of many.
Now K S, suggest cutting your predicates to shorten the piece. If you were wrting this de Hispanol which I venture to guess may be possible ... allow less past tense. This will make the flow go a bit easier for readers and enhance jokes at the same time.
Funny? Lordy, yes.
Thank you. This is a tale of mishap that Writing.C can be very proud to display.
Now, Girl. You are just gettin to darn good. This honest-to-God, historic poem, c-rite Oct 2K4 is the best I ever read on US happenings.
Spanning over FIFTY YEARS with delicate balance and cadence, Sunflower offers a real treat with her poem IT WAS ALWAYS BURNIN (an add on to a Billy Joel song, aw heck he won't mind.)
Love == '61 Hemingway, Eichmann, "Stranger In a Strange Land"
Dylan, Berlin, Bay of Pigs Invasion."
Fabulous == "Bill Bates, tax rebates ..."
This writer / author knows her stuff, research firm. Thus you go Girl!
Now Sunflower, I know I revved you before, please visit:
A holiday poem from Norksquad: THE CHURCH BELLS CHIMED is sorta what the doctor ordered this morning.
Well titled.
Like: "As the church bells pealing grows." Pealing a word we don't use often enough. Writers can apply this to voices. Mental note for self. I'm stealing pealing, Nork.
Like: "I see the Babe upon the throne."
Calming line in time of stress or pain.
Of into: Small things bring Christmas joy ... seems suffieicent for a short work.
Teff tries poetry in Feb. Contagious these rhyme time reads. Glad to learn from THE CHURH BELLS CHIMED, c-rite
Jan 2005. Glad they ring every Sunday throughout the world.
Thanx Nork. Best Luck everyday.
OH, nearly forgot, try to cut down a tad on 'the' with premise not every noun needs a the.
"Author Anne Finley's THE LEGEND OF MR BICKERSTAFF is what story telling is all about. Set n 1837 a devil of a fierce man marries a maiden, much to the dismay of the countryside."
Anne, the story's great. Kept me interested to know the results which yu set us up in the best of all lead in ways throughout the ghost tale. Good job!
Keeping to your venacular -- Perhaps try for Yes, tell us. Pray, tell us.
Intro is great: Man sells his soul to the devil.
lllllll SIDEBAR: Teff did a protest story last Spring: Confess With The Devil, published in the UK. Thus first hand knowledge of what Anne is attempting re: manifestation. llllllllllllllllllll
Love: " ... fresh breeze after a long stale winter" Great line!
Physical character details rt down to sneers, frowns. etc.
When the story moves on with: "A young man came forward ... he knew the secret,"
Ms Finley also supplies the climax hook.
Oh, believe it, she sets her readers up in a manner of suspence.
Of the lovely maiden: "... she disappeared into his estate."
And You, dear readers, authors, members and guests must enjoy this one as soon as
you get a chance. A Feb 2005 c-rite on Writing.Com which is a good basis for how-to-write a good story and captivate reders at the same time.
Two things, Anne dear.
1. Render that English countryside setting for us. Easily enough, you have the dialogue pretty much. Research with photo & geog online is my suggestion. Even trees near the lake. Not exactly fog. (Reading about Whitechapel lately supplies too much fog for me>) Well you get the picture.
One teeny biff. Of Biskerstaff. This to me implies Bickering staff. Disgruntled employee-wise. Into the foray find those Eng heritage names. The compund names. Heathersmith eg. Whatever. I found Bickerstaff to be the wrong name for the title. For no good reason whatsoever, but you read this suggestion, Anne, hon.
A change in the name may make the story even better, see? Could be a real name, if so sorry. Just doesn't fly.
Well, thanks for listening. And thank you for this one.
GIVE WORDS TIME, a new poem from the folder of Ann Ticipation is a play on words, we need appreciate & ponder.
Lately sitting by the window watching birds at the feeders, exausted from 3 review awards & being No. 50 for rev's last month ... I took up a few poems. One gets heat, the other is hot off the presses.
With Ann's explanation of the poetic muse, I see why I penned them at all.
Thanks Ann. You work improves, always rings and says a lot in short verse.
What a fantastic suggestion for your contest. I opened ContestNewsletter very much too late. My favorite thing when I read a story is setting. One likes to be put there like an anchor at the bottom of the sea, almost. Once I worte that without setting the charcters are walking around in a void.
Your contest is a generous one, well planned and you have over 39 posters who will conquer the setting bug, I'm sure.
"Psyhic actress meets Robert on the way to Indiana."
Play format. Oft times scene change missing a setting.
Contention of characters meeting with a stalled car, then sitting side by side on a jet. Maybe consider dropping the highway scene. If it fits, and YOU like it.
Conversation at an Indianappolis diner a tad unusual with no heading lead in.
Convo covers mob revenge to a dead dame.
Pretty racy town, Indy? Wow! What a stretch. Author needs back up reseach for that stretch and lead ins. Or it shoots out of nowhere.
=== Like, hey wanna hear how the mob hates me? Cream or sugar? (Teff's words not authors.)
Act 2. Scene 2 --- where invisible.
Also missing is the rural Indiana family from the intro. Oh, the hooligans?
Inquring minds want to know.
Overall C. And yes this Jan copyrite drama has potential and may be saved.
Jumping off the podium here from Alabama Courier News Times (a fic paper) and into reality. With your so-called poem: THAT'S WHERE I MET REALITY, we need examine if this item is in fact poetry. No, it is not.
It is of course a rant. No problem there.
If it is intended for a poem, a sep at every line ending will greatly help.
Shorten. Poems needn't rhyme, they can be prose. You are so close to a prose poem.
Now the suggestions I can't make any other than the above.
In Sum: again a young woam scorned, bares all about her stuck-up lover. Perhaps a sexy hunk she met thru friends. He's there, she's there. Maybe no love lost at betwixt the two of them. Fiction? Yes.
Say yes, Innocent 187. You have a startling brainstorm page going here for realism. The first few lines rhyme, some lines rhyme.
Well, guys roll out the carpet, a start of either a poem or an essay, a compostion found. Everyone will already like That's Where I Met Reality and recognize the earstwhile potential. Teffy sure did. Serious.
"A WOMAN scorned ... (in LETTING GO by Shawnie, copyrite July 2004) writes an essay of her feelings to the ex-hubby. 'First love, first kiss' ... then BA Boom! Absent lover. First person narrative, pen to paper, a marriage summary, feelings intact & heart broken. Until hope with the words: It is a time for me to heal." Dear Readers, pick this up to see what happens everyday accoss the USA."
From the fictitious Book Section of Alabama Courier News Times / Feb 3
The Suggestion: More paragraphs, please.
If a letter, no salutation. In fact try to sep marriage/ kids, recital sum from Dear John letter. And if possible & it fits & YOU like it ... make that distinction clearer. Good job overall. Respond to
"Enjoy philospphical poetry with Death in the genre? Take up ALL I REALY WANT by Madman at Large. Read from grapes @ Safeway to PC's and black holes. Travel 'back in time' via 'pen & paper' & dreams."
Review from the desk of Managing Editor of the fictitious Alabama Courier News Times/ Feb 3.
The Suggestion: Check excessive comma usage. Genre of philosophy unmet. Genre of Writing == also unmet.
Don't worry. If you go back to the drawing board with this poem, let me know. So I can move over & make room for you, Mr Madman. As lots or authors spend months of time there. Best Luck.
On the other hand, sad & maudlin may have a place in contests. Who knows? Another venue, maybe.
Content rating. Advise: try again. Breath in, breath out; think of other things today. === Cordially, Teff
"Follow Juan Morales escapades in Cuidad-del-Dios. Mark well his wife, Margarita Morales's fun loving life. Note the couples estrangement, spelling their daily fare. UNTIL 'El Emperador' arrives, offering a fortune for a pearl necklace from Juan, the master jeweler. With certain strings attached.
WILL Margarita "disappear forever without a trace?"
Maybe yes, maybe no.
This Review from the Books Sec of ALabama Courier Times.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.60 seconds at 12:31pm on Jul 02, 2025 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
