Hello Sugaree
This is a review in response to your request through "Invalid Item" 
You have two very emotional chapters, which tell the story of Skyla and her traumatic childhood experiences. The main theme is that of childhood abuse, and the tragic effects it can have throughout an abused person's life.
The story flowed quite well, but could have had a pinch less 'passive descriptions' and more 'showing' to alow the tragedy and vivid imagery, to come alive even more.
Your continuity at times, needed correcting, but the story was still told vividly.
The characters unfolded well and I got to know them inside out.
The end was very emotional, but left me feeling with a tragic sense of release.
I hope the following observations will help you revise this piece.
Thanks for sharing.
Frankies Girl
Observations
experience from escaping crazed men a frustratingly greater Put a comma after 'crazed men,'
she answered in a semi sensual voice just in case it Put a comma after ..sensual voice,
Skyla chuckled to herself because it was obvious he had either heard or sensed that he was not whom she wanted on the phone by the uncertainty in his voice This is rather a mouthful. See if you can break it down a little, by use of punctuation of division into shorter sentences.
The tone in her voice cheered a bit so not to alienate Put a comma after '..bit,' and 'as' between the words 'so' and 'not'
He lived three hours away but still frequented the college town to visit his grandparents and check out Put a comma after ..'hours,' and after 'grandparents,'
She hanged the phone up abruptly so not to hear his smart response. She laughed to herself at how annoyed he gets when someone beats him hanging up. Put a comma after 'abruptly,' and 'as' between 'so' and 'not to' Change 'he gets' to 'he always got' - Change '..beats him hanging' to 'beat him to hanging..'
Check to see where punctuation could be improved throughout the text.
As Skyla opened to heavy 1970 Ford car door,....danced through her minds of when the car belonged Typo. Should be c:red} ...opened the heavy ..and ...her mind..
It was within the last couple of years since Skyla had been banned from her paternal grandparent’s home for speaking up about her father’s indecent activities with her as a child that Darnell and she started hanging out {(c} Consider revising this, as it's a bit long.
“daddy’s little secrets" Put a capital on "Daddy's..'
Skyla found out that she had been banned From here onwards, in the next few paragraphs, you change from her being in the car to the actual things that happened/stories - you need to revise these, as they would enhance continuity.
They parked near an abandoned shed or old dilapidated one room house that looked like what slaves used to occupy Should be one-roomed and a comma after shed,' and 'house,'
apartment. Skyla, again, was hesitant, but answered him yes.
They pulled up to the small row of apartments on Take out 'him' before 'yes' and close up the line spacing.
but then she thought, “What the hell. He is cool.” Thoughts work better in italics.
Skyla said ignoring the sentimentals her cousin was giving Typo. Should be 'sentiment'
Skyla’s hands were trembling, as was her voice when she interjected, “What did you say?
The look on Darnell’s face answered her question. He had said exactly what she thought. Put a line spacing between these two sentences.
She asked him what he was thinking about.
“I was just thinking that if me and you did it no one would have to know,” he rambled through letting smoke out of his lungs, not even looking at her. Insert a line spacing after the first line.
about your own father, that's why you didn't tell about Homie,” Insert 'that' or 'the' before 'Homie,'
She was screaming although she Would be better as 'She screamed, although she
neck in hopes that her hands would land near his jugular vein so that she could rip it out.
Darnell was a college wrestler so that plan failed. He had her now. She continued to Close up the spacing after 'out.'
The rain storm just yesterday left this wooded low land like marsh Should be 'rainstorm'
She was not sure if he was just resting or if he was sincere in his sorry apology Put a comma after resting,'
She was not hididng anything Typo. Should be 'hiding'
Her constant questions atopped with all the others questioning her had started to irritate her Should be 'stopped'
She had on a one piece body suit with cris-crossed straps Should be 'one-pieced'
Gabriel was known for her gossiping, but, somehow Skyla believed she would be different with her since she was the one that had befriended her upon her arrival to a new school of snooty folk that looked down on her and her family for the service work they did in town versus a respectable intellectual career on campus or at the elementary- high school in some fashion with the exception of cleaning and garbage disposal This sentence is too long. Maybe you could consider dividing it into two or three shorter sentences.
You need to take out the italics in the second paragraph after her thoughts {/c:red}She laughed to herself thinking that was really a nasty thing{/} to show if it is what she believed it was.
Check other parts for tense construction, punctuation and line spacing.
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